Epiphany Moment

There are many reasons I decided but the primary reason I went natural because I wanted a healthier lifestyle. And I have always used my hair as my crutch to not work out routinely. So if I cut my hair and began a journey to go natural, excuses could no longer occupy the space I wanted to create to become a healthier, full of love for self person I aspire to become.

I've always hated flat, lifeless hair, and that's exactly what my fine hair looks like after a fresh touch-up. I began strectching my relaxer sessions and quickly realized that I didn't really need the relaxer. Never having been one to submit the slavery of the beauty salon, I was already a pro at maintaining my hair, so I knew I could figure this "natural hair" thing out for myself. After some researach and a few answered questions, I did the big chop, practically overnight. I was already 4 months post my last relaxer and was always enamored by my new growth, so I thought what better time than the present.
My aha moment came when I realized I didn't "need" the relaxer. I never felt I was unacceptable/unkept with it, but I guess I just always thought it was the thing I was "supposed" to do since everyone else did it. Shortly after that, I felt it was my responsibility to help convey the message that what grows from our scalps is beautiful, no matter the number or letter we use the describe, or classify, it. I had been relaxed since about 11 years old (when my father finally conceded to my begging), so I do remember my natural hair and could appreciate it for what it was. My mom had passed away when I was only 7, so I took over my own daily hair care shortly thereafter (as crazy as that sounds) relying on the bi-weekly pressing comb sessions by my grandmother. I do, now, feel as though we natural women have the responsibility of helping young girls appreciate themselves for the way God created them. That's the message I choose to pass down to my 21-month old daughter. I want her to see beauty in herself and love every inch of the curly, kinky, fuzzy, nappy mass that sits on top of her head.

Honestly, my decision to go natural was a gradual process. I had been getting relaxers from 1999 to 2004 professionally and I always hated the process. I had too much hair to risk having it done at home. Even when I was relaxed my hair was very thick and dense, so they would always charge me extra and I would always get burned and I would physically get sick from being in the hair salon all day [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] [I suffer from migraines and nausea set on by noise, light, strong fragrances, and not eating on time]. I always looked crazy after the first week of freshly relaxed hair anyway (I never owned a flat iron [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] ]. I really abhorred going to the salon, so senior year of high school I had a relaxer in October 2003 and the next time I went back was May 2004 and only because I went to prom and had no idea what else to do with my hair. If I had known about "going natural" back then, I could have had a 7 month head start in transitioning. May 2004 ended up being the last time I got a relaxer and I gradually cut away my relaxed ends. Fortunately, in November 2006, I finally found out about "going natural" when I bumped into the nappturality website.

I wore braids off and on for a year. As time progressed, I would take note of how soft my natural hair felt. It was soft and wavy. Because of this feeling, I was encouraged to keep it braided. Through out this year- what is now known as transitioning, I would run my fingers through my hair and say that this is what God has given me and it is perfect. So after about a year of braids, I went into work one day in September 2000 and told my co-worker to cut it down to the natural hair. It was empowering. It was liberating. I was hawt! I could find fault with some things about me that I may have contributed to but my natural hair is perfect!

I had been thinking about going natural for years like "Oh, I might want to do that one day." I have a friend that has been natural (2x) for a long time, but had just decided to wear her hair out. Right after her decision, I started getting interested again in really doing it. I had a lot of new growth, but I chickened out and got a perm. I felt like I couldn't manage my hair being broke and jobless. I got a job soon, though and decided to transition with kinky twists. They didn't stay in long because I also wanted to get the process over with; I was impatient and wanted to see what my hair would be like. Despite my friend warning me about possible shock and regret, I BCed February 7th and never looked back. I never thought I'd be this happy about my nappy hair than I am. It's amazing thing to accept apart of yourself despite others' opinions and feelings.

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Well, I have always been natural, never had the creamy crack. However, I never really accepted my natural hair and really been proud of it until recently. I would always keep it straigtened, keep it in braids, or in a ponytail.
My older sister went natural about 3-4 years ago. Me and her started to look on places where we can find out the right way and healthy way to take care of our hair. We found so many resources, but the main thing that helped was youtube.
Being able to see other women be proud and embrace their natural hair and feel like it was beautiful and unique encouraged me to wear my hair outmore. So, the thing that really made me embrace my naturallness was my growing online family of natural sisters! :-] [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I went natural simply because I LOVE the way natural hair looks! When I went away to college, I went to a HBCU and there were many women there with beautiful natural hair...I was in awe. I decided my first semester to go natural and started transitioning

I decided to go natural because I can vividly remember what my hair was like as a kid. At age 11 I begged my mom for a relaxer due to the fact that I was brain washed to believe that straighter hair was better. I also wanted a relaxer because I hated to get my hair comb, which was a result of my mom lacking knowledge on how to care for natural hair. My sister and I would literally hide the comb and brush on the days my mom planned to comb our hair. We did not get our hair combed everyday considering that it was a hassle. After getting a relaxer I have to admit that my hair became much more manageale but overtime my hair begin to vanish before my eyes. I could not believe that the relaxer had destroyed my hair the way that it did. Tough I was relaxed my hair was in a healthy state according to other people, but if only they knew what my hair was like before the relaxer. After about 5 years of being relaxed I thought about turning back several times but people would tell me that I would have to cut all my hair off or if I didnt cut it all off my hair would begin to break off terribly. I refused to shave my head and I was very afraid of my hair breaking off and being extremely damaged so I continued to relax. One day my aunt made a comment about how I had such beautiful hair as a kid and I immediately realized that obviously my hair was not beautiful anymore; so I decided to go natural, and at that point whatever going natural consisted of was fine with me. If going natural meant all my hair breaking off then oh well; this is how disgusted I became with my relaxed hair. After going without a relaxer for several months I discovered CurlyNikki and a few other blogs; I felt like it was heaven sent. I have been transitioning for 10 months now and I plan to BC when I reach the 12th month. Learning how to care for my hair properly has been one of the best rewards ever. Since I've been transitioning I have had little to no breakage and I am extremely anxious to reunite with my natural hair again.

I always knew I'd go natural -- I arbitrarily thought I'd do it when I had a child (because I'd heard that your hair grows super-fast when you're pregnant, ha!) But after awhile, I was like, "Why am I waiting to get married and have a baby to do this? Wouldn't it be much more powerful to have a head full of natural hair when my child first lays eyes on me? Why am I waiting for the idyllic situation to do something that is, really, just about ME?"

I had already been stretching my relaxers about 20 weeks (3x/year), and when I went to get my last one, and I listened to the assistant complain and just go on an on and on about how hard it was to get through my hair, I thought, "This is a sign: The time is NOW!" After all, why was I paying to have a procedure done AND feeling like I'm being berated in the process? Even if it was just teasing, it reaffirmed how there's no respect or understanding about how to handle multiple textures of hair. And I was feeling emboldened and up for the "challenge"...I wanted a change.

That was Fall 2007 and it was the best time and the best decision. I truly feel that it was ordained to go that way. (And shyt, if I had waited for a husband and a baby to make the decision, I'd still be waiting...ha!)

Okay.... we are all ladies, and we have been through different situations when it comes to love, and love lost.

I was in a relationship with a guy for 3 years. Through the whole time my hair was laid and fried just right, thats how he liked it. Well, the relationship ended badly when I found out he was cheating on me.... Devastated was not even the word for how I felt. Then when I saw the girl and her hair I was floored. I have nothing against weave- even wore it myself from time to time. But her weave was something that needed help. I at that point wanted to be the complete opposite of what he left me for. Backwards? Maybe! Helpful? Yes. It led me down a path where now I am learning to love me and everything that comes with it. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Hi Curly Nikki and followers

I would say a liitle of both. I was diagnosed with psoriasis (skin and scalp condition due to an overgrowth of skin cells causing flaky red patches) when I was nine years old and although it has decreased significantly over the years, I still get scalp outbreaks on occasion. (I didn't get my hair relaxed until I was about 13 years old after begging my mother because I wanted my hair to look like MC Lyte in the Paperthin video. LOL). As a result of this condition, my scalp almost always burned after a relaxer leaving me with scabs. Hairdressers would tell me not to scratch, but I always had scalp sores or thick scaly flakes, so I would still burn even if I managed not to scratch. I would always stretch out the time between touch-ups and I tried to go natural twice before in both college and upon finishing graduate school only to go back when a "special occasion" came up (pictures, job interview). I finally just said screw it and had my last perm in April 2006 around the time my husband and I wanted to try to have our son (kinda light bulb?). I was leary about the chemicals affecting the baby in utero.

I never big chopped. I moslty had my hair in flat twists or braids (no extensions b/c my hubby hates them) , flat-ironed, or my usual bun. I have recently become a fanatical YouTube viewer (PrettyDimples is my favorite) and googler and stumbled upon this awesome site. I am now trying to find better no heat styling options (besides the bun & puff) and am trying to improve my braiding skills so i can do my daughter's hair in creative styles as she gets older (she's only five months now). Your website is outstanding and I love all of the useful information you have given to the natural hair community. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Peace and Blessings,
Crystal

I definitely had a light bulb moment that fueled my decision to go natural. It was getting close to the time for my usually touch-up and one day I literally woke up and decided I don't want to get a relaxer. I was tired of the whole experience. I wanted the healthy hair I had before I got a relaxer. I am currently transitioning and am super excited about my journey back to healthy hair.

I thought I posted my wonderful story, but i can't find it on here...so i'll repost a shorter version.

I begged for a relaxer in high school. After much begging and pleading, I got one. I was content with the results because it was straight and looked like everyone else's hair. My mom regulated my relaxers to twice a year. I continued with this twice a year get up till my junior year in college. I hated the relaxer, and the hot comb even more. By my junior year in college, flat irons were around and did wonders for my hair. I made the conscious decision to cease and desist with the relaxers. My hairdresser didn't agree, so I had to get a new one. I found one that did "natural hair," but that meant she could do a mean flat-iron. I was sold.

With a head full of new growth and relaxed ends it seemed like a good idea to get a hair cut. The Rihanna cut was in that year, so I (well my hairdresser...I'm terrified about putting scissors in my hair) cut my hair into the trendy hairdo. It lasted for two weeks. My hair grew ridiculously long during that period. I did the flat iron twice a month. No hot comb and no extra heat in between visits. I thought I did it-- I achieved happy, healthy, manageable hair-- and I didn't need a relaxer to do it. I loved my hair so much that I decided to learn how to do it. hahahaha.

Later in life (two years later), my best friend starts talking about how she is going natural. Well, by now I've been natural hair for three years. I am telling her how great it is and she nicely drops a bomb that she is not going to flat iron...she is going completely natural. gasp gasp gasp! hahaha I thought it was great. So the next day, I washed my hair and looked at my curl pattern. I loved it!!! It didn't last too long because it was a dry nasty mess that was hard to comb later that day. I have an extremely tender head, so I was in tears trying to comb my hair.

I became a mad scientist. I was researching and trying everything to maintain my curl pattern and detangle my hair. I had the summer off from graduate school, and took it up as my personal research project. I am still learning but my hair seems to appreciate it. My hair and I get along well when i use the right products, technique, and dry time. I am always working to perfect it.

Yeah, I thought that would be the shorter version, but I get so winded and passionate talking about my hair. It is the one thing that I could talk about for days and days. hahaha :-)

My daughter actually prompted me to go natural. She's only 11 months but her hair is soooo curly and thick just as mines once was. And I remember hating wearing a bun in my hair day after day b/c no one knew what to do w/ my hair so when I turned 16 I got a relaxer. I don't want my daughter to EVER relax her hair so what better example would there be to show her that her natural hair can be just as beautiful than by having natural hair myself!

My light bulb moment came almost 5 years ago after I left the salon with a burned and scaly scalp. My hair flaked for about 3 or 4 weeks afterward and this was done by a trained professional. I had to ask myself what am I gaining from this (the relaxer) when I couldn't come up with any logical reason for getting the relaxer in the first place it was a fairly easy choice. Everyone who has seen my natural hair has always complimented me on it ever since I was a small child. But since getting the relaxer my texture has tremendously changed and I'm not so sure I can get it back. I have really curly hair on the right side of my head and really course hair that refuses to curl on the left side of my hair. However since I stop getting my hair relaxed my hair as a whole is a lot more healthier and fuller, it was definately the right choice.

wow...there are a LOT of posts! this is a great question....i see a lot more sisters going natural and i SO hope it's not just a fad....for me, "going" natural was and still is a process, it's a lifestyle change that entails love and appreciation of oneself. i big chopped in september of 2003....my barber boyfriend actually did it and i colored it soon thereafter.[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] no one else in my family was natural so i wasn't exactly supported (except by my wonderful younger brother)...but that wasn't a deterrent. there weren't a whole lot of naturals in memphis (that i could see) at that time either. i just did what i felt was best for me!
i've learned so much about my hair and myself for that matter....i also try to appreciate others just for what they are....not for what i want them or expect them to be (if that makes any sense). at any rate...the change was a gradual one in my head (for more than 4 years) and heart but when i decided on it....it occurred rapidly!
my hair does NOT like color....but it does love water! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] i love the versatility of it and how no other hair can do what ours does! thank you Lord for giving us just what we need at all times. some co-workers ask if i will ever go back to relaxing...to which i respond....why the heck would i want to do that?!?!?! i'm going to remain the way God intended me to be since all i want to do in this life is what He has for me to do!

I decided to go natural after I felt like i had become dependent on weaves and wigs to make me beautiful. I would wear my hair and think that i wasn't as beautiful without my weave and there was absolutely nothing wrong with my hair. I knew that i was beautiful and that's when i decided to go natural i need to love my natural self. i am transitioning (it's been four months). [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I decided to go natural when i realized i didn't enjoy relaxing my hair and looking like every other girl. I always enjoyed being different and i always wanted to find out more about myself and my passions. Not only did i want to stop being addicted to a specific look but i felt that sometimes what we define as beauty should be ourselves. I felt that by cutting the straight hair that didnt really suit me and doing something more fun and outrageous and just enjoyable for myself was the way to go. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Well...I moved to the US in 2003 from the islands and it was extremely expensive to go to the hair salon to relax my hair. After 9mths of not perming I decided to do the BC, my cousin who was also natural had fun with this process. I was only left with 1 1/2inches on my head, I literally cried when I saw myself after the fact I never wore my hair out it was always under a scarf, but as time progressed I became more confident to wear my hair.

Sadly in 2006 I was getting tired of wearing my hair in twists all the time, so I decided to flat-iron my hair without doing the proper research. I basically fried my hair straight...it was not reversing to its curly state. Old proverb says "you never miss the water 'til the well runs dry". I kept on flat-ironing until in 2008 (after hurricane Ike) I did the BC and vowed to never do no harm to my hair ever again, I was back to 2inches yet again.

After my BC I started looking around and tried different things that works and what didn't; 6mth ago I found Terri at www.tightlycurly.com and it led me to Nikki at www.curlynikki.com, I felt like I had emotional support from these on line communities. My hair is growing extremely fast and it is at 7 1/2 inches after a yr of the BC.

Extremely happy with my hair, to my curly sista keep on keeping on. Natural is BEAUTIFUL!!!!

Well, here goes...I have toyed with the idea of being natural for about 3 years, but I was too scared to do it because of my very conservative, southern coworkers. After a lot of soul searching and quitting my job to go back to school, I decided what better time to do it? I, like a lot of other people, haven't seen my hair since I was like 11 and I really wanted to see what MY hair looks like. One of my inspirations was my friend from college (but even she gave into the creamy crack temptation last spring :-(). I stopped getting relaxers and have started all types of protective styles and using my satin scarf religiously. I haven't made it far yet (8 months), but I can say that being on the hair boards have helped me TREMENDOUSLY! I love the fact that I can ask about products and get an honest answer and know what products to avoid. I also love the fact that I have the support of my family (my sister, nieces, and nephews have locks) and they help me style my hair when I am in a rut. I think that this will be the greatest journey of my life and I am so ready for it! This is a life changing experience and I am glad that I have you guys to help me along! Thanks!

Honestly, I never really thought about going natural and I had absolutely no intent to go natural in my life, I happened to this change purely by chance. To me relaxing my hair vs being natural was just a style choice and I preferred to wear my hair straight. That's it there was no self loathing or feeling that natural hair was ugly. I've been relaxing my hair since I was 14 because I wanted to have more styling options. Obviously my mother didn't know how to do my hair, because my natural hair was past shoulders and the only thing she would ever do with it was put it in a french braid. Her lack of knowledge about natural hair translated to my lack of knowledge about my hair.

For the next 16 years I was getting a relaxer every 4 weeks because after 2 weeks my hair cuts wouldn't lay right since my hair grows fast. I turned 30 this year and I've been working on losing weight and living a healthier lifestyle, as result of this I shifted to an organic/chemical free lifestyle this summer. I've eating primarily organic foods, all natural vitamins, using chemical free toliet paper, household cleaners etc. I've been getting wonderful results, my skin is smoother and clearer, I have more energy, all of my food allergies/sensitivities have disappeared.

As started making a change, I had a revelation. I was putting all this effort to rid my body and home of dangerous and possibly hormone disrupting chemicals and yet I'm putting lye on my scalp every month!! So then I proceeded to cut off my hair and go natural............uh no, that's not what happened (it would be nice and neat end to the story but real life is never "nice and neat"). I continued to relax my hair for a few more months while plotting my course of action. I decided that I wasn't going to relax my hair but I wasn't sure what to do with it, I figured that I could start wearing weaves and braids and get it pressed every now and then. I didn't want to start pressing my hair monthly because I new that would just damage and I'd be trading one bad hair process for another.

So I had my last relaxer Aug 21, 2009. The two weeks later my hair stopped laying right, so I ran out and brought a wig. Things were fine for another 2 weeks, but then my wig started getting tight. My hair was to my chin and as my hair was growing I there was less room under my wig, so I cut a little bit of my relaxed hair off. My rationale was "I'm going natural, what does it matter if I cut some of this relaxed hair, I'm going to cut it off eventually". See I didn't know anything about all the wonderful hair sites on the web, so I didn't know about transitioning, BC'ing or anything. So two more weeks go by and the wig is getting tighter and I'm starting to get tired of feeling like my scalp was in prison. I was also wasn't enjoying washing my hair with the two dramatically different textures in it. So I when to town and started hacking off my relaxed hair and then I went to work with my TWA..............naw, that's not quite what happened. I did cut off my relaxed hair but I went to work with my weave for another week.

At this same time, I was googling different braid and weave styles trying to figure my next step, when I happened on some Youtube videos of various women discussing their experiences going natural. From there I started finding different websites like CurlyNikki and Nappturality and learned how to take care of my hair and how to style it. I felt relieved to be rid of my relaxed hair but I wasn't sure about wearing it out because I didn't think that I had a "fro face". You know that diva/model type chick who can wear a fro and look fabulous? I didn't know that girl and the chick with the TWA that was looking at me in the mirror seemed kinda odd looking. But during my first week post BC I only wore my wig outside. At home I walked around with my fro and lo and behold I started to feel comfortable with that chick in the mirror rocking the TWA (she actually looked pretty good, especially with some foundation and eyeliner). The following week I brought some clippers and gave myself a shape up. Monday morning I walked into work feeling confident, I got a lot of compliments and a lot of puzzled looks (which I am still getting 1 month post BC and 2 1/2 months relaxer free). So for me going natural was a gradual accident but it's the best thing that has happened to my head in a long time. I don't have dandruff any more, my routine is so easy to maintain (and much cheaper as well) and best of all it's chemical burn free!!

I decided to go natural, first, because the perm that I had been keeping up for four years was slowly eating my hair away. I did not have a perm throughout high school, but decided to get one my last year. While in college, I did my best to get my hair done at least once per month (most times, once every two weeks) and it STILL was dying a slow death. I knew how healthy and full of life my hair could be and the Affirm was doing its best to keep that from happening.

So, my last year in college, I decided to stop getting the perm. I got it pressed off and on for the next four years (with a brief all nat-u-ral run after an unintentional BC in May 2006). I finally decided to stop getting it pressed on September 11th, 2009 because I was mostly tired of waiting at the hair salon for hours every two weeks, throwing money away as soon as I stepped out into the rain or worked out, being afraid of what my hair would look like if it was not under the control of intense heat, and my growing curiosity of what that soft hair right out my scalp looked like.

It's been a statement of my confidence in being what God has truly made me. I finally wanted to fall in love what all of who I am and embark on an endeavor that would bring my healthy hair back... by my own hands!

After mulling over the idea of going natural for years, I had a moment of clarity once I realized that my great grandmother transitioned to natural after about 50 years or so of having a relaxer. If she can do it, so can I. Haven't looked back since and that was in October of 2008...

What sparked my decision to go natural?
I decided to go natural about two months ago because I want to know and love my real hair. I look at my elementary school pictures and long for what the good lord gave me naturally. I'm tired of long waits in the salon, scabs after every LYE treatment (chemical burn) and just being a slave to a look that is not me anymore.

I know transitioning is a challenge but with the support of friends, family and a wonderful online community here at curlynikki, I'm committed to doing this. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]