Question?

Okay my hair shrivels in water other naturals say their hair loves water I don't think my hair does is their any alternatives or ways I can manipulate my hair into liking water I've been researching and finding nothing it's like when I was younger and had a perm I avoided water like it was the black plague, but now I thought I could enjoy my natural hair without the worry of water but I guess I still do sigh

Shrinkage (or "shrivels" as you described it) is a part of being natural. Natural hair shrinks. The only way to keep it from shrinking as much is to twist it, braid it, or band it after you wash it.

Water is the best thing for natural hair. It doesn't hate it. It's necessary to keep your hair from being dry. We have extremely tight coils, so our hair shrinks. Mine can shrink about 50-66% but other people's hair can shrink to 75% of its length. The key is to seal in the moisture after you put water in your hair so it won't dry out. You could use butters or oils as sealers.

hair loves water! There is no need to aviod it. You may have 'hard water'. Try using a shower filter and see what happens