Long-term transition...afraid to BC! =)

Hey ya'll!

I am so excited about being part of the CN fam! I love this site and the knowledge I have gained since I joined! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I decided to go natural last summer...my last relaxer was May 2009. I was encouraged by my mom and a close friend to go natural. However neither of them wear their natural curls... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Anywho, when I started out my hair journey I was blow drying and flat ironing my hair every two weeks, now I know it is a BIG NO NO! Recently I have been trying out the twist outs and braid outs. The only problem I have is the frizz...I am sure it is due to my straight ends [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] . I was wondering if any of you may have suggestions. I don't want to BC just yet, my hubby is totally against it and truth be told he really isn't a fan of my hair being curly at all [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] . The main reason I decided to go natural is for the versatility, I just love the many different ways I will be able to rock my hair! If anyone has any tips for a long-term transitioner, please share them.

Also, I was wondering if there were any naturals here in the Birmingham, AL or Montgomery, AL area. It would be great if we could do a meet-up and share info.

I've been transitioning for nearly 18 months and I only style my hair after a fresh cowash. I wear TnCs most of the time and protect my style at night with bantu knots and a satin cap. Whenever I roll my hair or twist I make sure to apply some shea butter or CD's Healthy Hair Butter to protect those dirty rotten straight ends. Oh! And I always use end paper with rollers. Keep those hands out your hair.

Hey! Im new here too. My last relaxer was in April '09 and I plan to BC in April '10. Well I did get anxious last month and cut some myself but its completely uneven/hotmess. lol. Im transitioning with sew-ins in the mean time. Im sure your husband will come around. Mine was so afraid of my curls until I educated him on how damaging relaxers are and when he actually saw some curls on my head. Now he tells me everyday to get this weave out of my head and be curly. Good Luck!

Hey Vee!!! I agree with the ladies above, I pretty much only styled my hair right after washing it (I would use shampoo like once a month or so). I styled my hair dry to do braid outs, twist outs and buns. But my staple style was bantu knot outs!! Those I could do on dry hair and I could re-do them nightly. The frizz issue might go down if you use oil when you're taking the style "out". I would use Hot 6 oil on my hands when taking out braids. Also, Curly Nikki's twist-n-curl method helps get those relaxed ends in shape! That way they're not so noticeable or frizzy. Hope this helped!

Vee-

Welcome to the fam. My hair gets frizzy when it need moisture. I moisture it with a shea butter/coconut mix and seal it with castor oil. My hair [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] castor oil. There is a castor oil challenge you may want to check it out.

The more you educated yourself about your hair and natural hair in general the better you can educated your hubby. My hubby has always been supportive but I have to educate him about the transition process. You may want to remind him that "You are not my hair". You are FAB regardless if your hair is straight or curly, just remind him of that sometimes [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] . Good Luck with your journey, you have a lot of support on this site.

Lastly, under the general thread there is a thread for meeting-ups. I'm sure there are a lot of curlies in AL.

Thanks ladies for all the tips. I plan on taking a little trip this weeked to find some shea butter and coconut oil. If I can't find any in the stores I will be ordering it real soon...what are some of the best brands/kind to use?

I plan to contiue my natural journey despite my hubby's lack of support. He fears that my hair is going to look dry, wild and frizzy...I have told him that this is a learning process for me too. I have also reassured him that my hair will look fab natural and he will love it...I hope [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] !

One thing that helped me during my transition was my bf was so supportive to join me at the NYC premiere of "Good Hair". He was so amazed about how much women of color spend on chemical treatments and weaves. There is a scene when Chris Rock visits a lab and demonstrates the ridic effects of sodium hydroxide, the main ingredient in chemical relaxers/texturizers. I think this will help your husband understand how you use to damage your hair and that you're pursuing a journey for a healthier you, and healthier hair.

@HAMPTONSFNST I have been dying to see that movie. I plan on watching it with my hubby real soon and I hope it does open his eyes a little. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Vee- If you have cable it's on-demand. It was 4.99 w/ my cable service in DC. But it's also on DVD. Yes, have him watch it and tell him if he don't support you going natural he will have to give you $1000 for a good weave. I bet he will LOVVVVVE your curles than [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] . When we watched it my husband looked at me w/ really big eyes (his eyes are alright big) [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] and said did you pay $1000.00 for your last weave. With a smile I said no honey. I really didn't but I wanted him to think I did. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] OK, I won't tell you the movie you just have to order it and let us know how your hubby say.

@Neethair I'm not married but I figure if I was and my husband was against me going natural, I'd pretty much use that line too to get him on the bandwagon. It scares me how much people think that Natural hair is "dry, wild, frizzy, etc". I mean, I know it's not, we know it's not, but a lot of people have those misconceptions. That's probably one of the main reasons why I'm a little scared to BC, I'm still single and on the market and I definitely don't want to be single because of my hair. (hmmm but I know if they can't love me for me then they're not worth my time)

Anywho...Vee goodluck and welcome and I'm sure that your husband will come around. I mean, he vowed to love you unconditionally, so be positive

Also, I've only been transitioning for 7 months (it'll be 8 next week!!!) and I've transitioned via sew ins, senegalese twists, half wigs, roller sets (i love them because they last forever), weave pony buns, bantu knot outs (oils and butters will be those relaxed ends' best friend)...

I think the easiest one for me to do was a rollerset. I only had to re-roll like every 3-4 days after pin curling them down. Mahogany Curls has an excellent video that was posted on CN about doing a rollerset/silk wrap on Natural hair!

Good luck and Hang on In There!

@ marbar1908 My last text-a-lax was July 2009. Looks like we are on the same path. I plan to BC on NYE. How is your transition going?

well it's going along greatly! I keep switching something up with my hair. Like it's crazy lol. But I've got the scissor bug & so I'm not tempted to cut all my hair off, I'm gonna cut off 1/2 or 1/4 of my ends this week. Unless I'm just compulsive. Lol.
How's urs been?

Hi Vee!

I live in Birmingham and I just BC'd on Friday night (will post pics soon!). I shop for natural hair care products and oils at Golden Temple (5 pts south across the street from Jim N Nicks) and Whole Foods on 280.

I know you said your husband doesn't want you to BC, but if you want to then maybe ya'll can compromise and you can do a mini-chop. My boyfriend did not want me to BC because he wasn't sure what I would look like with short hair, and frankly, I wasn't sure either. But I was also tired of dealing with the two textures, so this past Friday night, after 4 months of transitioning, I chopped!! And it looks A-MAZ-ING. It's one of the best decisions I've ever made.

While I was transitioning, flex-rods were my best friends. The style would last about 5 days and they are versatile because you can make different styles as the curls get older and frizzier.

curLEIGH wrote:Hi Vee!

I live in Birmingham and I just BC'd on Friday night (will post pics soon!). I shop for natural hair care products and oils at Golden Temple (5 pts south across the street from Jim N Nicks) and Whole Foods on 280.

I know you said your husband doesn't want you to BC, but if you want to then maybe ya'll can compromise and you can do a mini-chop. My boyfriend did not want me to BC because he wasn't sure what I would look like with short hair, and frankly, I wasn't sure either. But I was also tired of dealing with the two textures, so this past Friday night, after 4 months of transitioning, I chopped!! And it looks A-MAZ-ING. It's one of the best decisions I've ever made.

While I was transitioning, flex-rods were my best friends. The style would last about 5 days and they are versatile because you can make different styles as the curls get older and frizzier.

Thanks so much CurLEIGH! I will have to check out the Whole Foods market on 280. I can't wait to see pics of you BC...I am sure it looks great [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] . I washed my hair today and have really been considering doing it but I am sure my hubby would just die. Maybe a miniBC would do the trick!