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Negative Comments on the Curlynikki posts

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Post by Coilsandall 10th February 2011, 10:11 pm

I am really tired and annoyed by the negative comments that many of these anonymous bloggers contribute to the posts on the Curlynikki site. I think that this is a community that should only encourage positive, constructive feedback. Negative comments are not only ones that are limited to using profanity but ones that mimic, or insult the poster and his or her emotional experiences. I know that there has to be filter to a certain extent that probably isn't strong enough to only screen for the "nice," positive sounding comments, but really I've become so annoyed by the several negative comments that I've read. Some bloggers I've found feed off the frustration of some of the posters and other bloggers who are willing to share their emotional or even mental experiences while dealing with natural hair and its nuisances.

Other bloggers degrade, and insult the experiences themselves, like what Anon @ 4:42 did when she replied under the post regarding Afrobella today. I don't see the merit of negative comments that seek not to encourage other readers or posters, but instead have the effect of attacking them. What's the point of commenting if you're not going to offer any useful constructive advice? And of course all that is subjective, and of course those few, which seem to be so many to me now, do not reflect the goal of the Curlynikki site, but still. Call them haters, whatever you want. I don't see the worth of calling someone's emotional experience "trivial," which is what this anonymous blogger did and I don't see the value in her calling Afrobella dramatic. Going natural and being natural is a journey for many women and I definitely don't think that anyone who is so generous to share her experiences with this community should be so degraded or have her experience downplayed. Just my thoughts. I can definitely respect another's opinion even if I don't agree with it, but not when it seeks to hurt, attack or berate someone. No.

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Post by prettyporsche_ 11th February 2011, 12:46 am

I saw that comment. It was totally out of line & unnecesary.
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Post by Indigo.Blue 11th February 2011, 1:49 am

Here is one of my favorite stories:

"A farmer had only one horse, and one day the horse ran away. The neighbors came to comfort over his terrible loss. The farmer replied, “Maybe, maybe not.” A month later, the horse came home bringing with her two beautiful wild horses. The neighbors came to congratulate for his good fortune, “Such lovely, strong horses!” The farmer replied, “Maybe, maybe not.” The farmer’s son was thrown from the horse and broke his leg. All the neighbors came to console, “Such bad luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe, maybe not.” A war broke out and every able-bodied was recruited except the farmer’s son because of his broken leg. The neighbors came to congratulate the farmer. “Maybe, maybe not.” replied the farmer."

I often title my post and responses with "the unpopular opinion" because some people cannot handle a difference of opinion. I call it the American Idol Effect, people who cannot sing are never told by their families and friends because it is "negative."

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Post by dajewel 11th February 2011, 2:42 am

huh? what comment/?
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Post by MissyCee 11th February 2011, 11:25 am

Well said Coilandall!!!
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Post by CarlaAR 11th February 2011, 1:12 pm

dajewel wrote:huh? what comment/?

It must have been removed.

To the OP, I've seen this a lot lately. The whole recent KKP meltdown is just one of them. No
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Post by diego2memphis 11th February 2011, 3:57 pm

I agree Coilsandall! Well said!
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Post by dajewel 13th February 2011, 4:39 am

CarlaAR wrote:
dajewel wrote:huh? what comment/?

It must have been removed.

To the OP, I've seen this a lot lately. The whole recent KKP meltdown is just one of them. No

who or what is kkp?
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Post by DvaAuNaturel 13th February 2011, 5:21 am

I've noticed the negative comments and I think you have to just ignore it, albeit hard. Most people come here looking for advice, support, and for resources - not for drama.

Sometimes there are people looking to start some "ish" (if you know what I mean) if for no other reason than their own issues/misery/negativity. I'm all about differing opinions and people discussing a topic politely and agreeing to disagree but there are some who just want to take an opposing side or stir things up just because. Call it what you want or try to spin it however you please.

Oftentimes some of the simplest things from a posted topic is critized or turned into a negative discussion and I'm thinking/reading like damn, hello people that's not even what the topic is about...stay focused.

It's always interesting to me when I read the comments, especially the negative ones, that they are always anonymous. People, oftentimes, hide behind their foolishness and do/say things online they would NEVER say/do if face to face. Everybody is not happy or in a good place or feels good about themselves and it shows.



Last edited by DvaAuNaturel on 13th February 2011, 5:26 am; edited 2 times in total
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Post by CarlaAR 13th February 2011, 5:24 am

dajewel wrote:
CarlaAR wrote:
dajewel wrote:huh? what comment/?

It must have been removed.

To the OP, I've seen this a lot lately. The whole recent KKP meltdown is just one of them. No

who or what is kkp?

Keshia Knight Pulliam: Natural Hair Celeb 02/07/11

The meltdown was regarding her hair texture.
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Post by dajewel 13th February 2011, 1:53 pm

there was a meltdown over that article??? ur j/k, right???
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Post by CarlaAR 13th February 2011, 1:58 pm

dajewel wrote:there was a meltdown over that article??? ur j/k, right???

Yes, LOL. If you check it out, its about if KKP was authentic about her hair texture in one of the photos she shared...
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Post by dajewel 13th February 2011, 2:12 pm

oh ok....yeah i read the article first thing that morning and didn't check it back since now....i see what they are saying....cuz Rudy had a headful of 4 type hair....and it is kinda odd that now her hair resembles 3 types...oh well
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Post by misskris 13th February 2011, 2:19 pm

WOW!!! Really?? People were tripping over Keisha's hair??? People need to get a grip. Some are haters, some are pot stirrers.... but like one lady above said, try to just ignore the negativity. I bet some of the people who post those negative comments (and some who don't have pics posted) are relaxed girls who are hatin on the natural divas!!! lol We (most of us) know that CN is about help and support, POSITIVE support. I have benefited form this site as I know hundreds of others have too. It'll all be ok!!! Very Happy
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Post by misskris 13th February 2011, 2:20 pm

dajewel wrote:oh ok....yeah i read the article first thing that morning and didn't check it back since now....i see what they are saying....cuz Rudy had a headful of 4 type hair....and it is kinda odd that now her hair resembles 3 types...oh well
hey dajewel...that's true but some peoples' hair type does change over time. Maybe hers did as well. Never know!! Very Happy
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Post by tiashaunteé 24th March 2011, 11:08 am

misskris wrote:
dajewel wrote:oh ok....yeah i read the article first thing that morning and didn't check it back since now....i see what they are saying....cuz Rudy had a headful of 4 type hair....and it is kinda odd that now her hair resembles 3 types...oh well
hey dajewel...that's true but some peoples' hair type does change over time. Maybe hers did as well. Never know!! Very Happy

Mine changed over time. My younger pics look like "Rudy's hair" but my hair is a lot less denser know than it was when I was younger. Plus she colors her hair and i know color has the tendency to temporarily looser my curl pattern.

The negative comments were just rude.
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Post by MelMelBee 24th March 2011, 11:39 am

Hey Ladies,

I know I'm so late to this post, and despite my best efforts, I couldn't find the comment! I think Nikki took it down (rightfully so).

However, I agree with most of you in that there will ALWAYS be someone who has something not nice to say. Unlike having a difference of opinion as Indigo states (and she and I have had disagreements in other threads Smile ), being rude and disrespectful is not the same as having a difference of opinion. I can disagree with someone with respect and poise.

Therefore, I say when we see these things that are just "over the top" rudeness, we should ignore them and then ask Nikki to take them down...send a message to the haters to knock it off!
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Post by MelMelBee 24th March 2011, 11:42 am

P.S---Maybe the girl henna's....That has made my hair look like I've had relaxed ends...
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Post by Luscious Mahogany 24th March 2011, 11:55 am

I totally agree with your frustration coilsandall, some of those comments on people who post about being a transitioning natural or one whose BC'd are a bit harsh and can be very discouraging to some newly naturals as myself as to whether or not they would want to post their story. It is thought to be a site where we can come to get advice, encouragement and support through this journey but when the "Anonymous" haters/bitter individuals make crude comments posting stories is second guessed. I felt bad when i read the one story like last month of the light skinned lady with freckles on her face, beautiful woman, she BC'd and someone anonymously commented that her BC'd pic looked scary, now why would I want to post my story with people making comments like that especially when its already harder for some to fully embrace their TWA? I'm just saying.

Perhaps there shouldn't be an option to post comments Anonymously, that way when it happens the person's account can be deactivated or something idk.
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Post by Juices-n-Berries 24th March 2011, 11:57 am

I saw that debate too on kpp. It was ridiculous. Fortunately it doesn't happen as much on CN as much as some other sites. I missed what happened this morning. And I'm glad.
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Post by Juices-n-Berries 24th March 2011, 12:01 pm

I know the comment has been deleted. But what post are we talking about?
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Post by BrownSkinDiva 24th March 2011, 12:22 pm

This definitely isnt the place for negativity and I think its sad when folks come on uplifting sites to be negative and make such derogatory statements.
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Post by BekkaPoo 24th March 2011, 12:34 pm

I guess part of letting people "do them" is letting them air their rudeness as well. Of course posting negativity anonymously is just cowardly, but just because someone else is having a bad day (week, month, or LIFE) doesn't mean they get to affect me. Just KIM and if they don't like what they see hear or read, that's not my problem. I'm happy as a clam. Smile
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Post by fuzzypuff 24th March 2011, 2:53 pm

What a timely post! I don't comment much on blogs / forums because I have found that (get ready to gasp) when I speak on my opinion about some things, and clearly state that it is my opinion and my opinion only, I get comments from people calling me ignorant / stupid / ridiculous / pitiful / a miserable excuse for living, etc..... I could go on. And this last time I posted on another site and read some comments, I got a little down in the dumps. I was thinking why in the hell are you attacking me? I'm just stating my opinion. If you don't like my comment...well....don't comment. Or better yet, don't insult me; engage me in some constructive dialogue to see where I'm coming from.....geesh. I can agree to disagree, but I can't stand cowards who hide behind their computers and belittle people......
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Post by tiashaunteé 24th March 2011, 3:09 pm

fuzzypuff wrote:What a timely post! I don't comment much on blogs / forums because I have found that (get ready to gasp) when I speak on my opinion about some things, and clearly state that it is my opinion and my opinion only, I get comments from people calling me ignorant / stupid / ridiculous / pitiful / a miserable excuse for living, etc..... I could go on. And this last time I posted on another site and read some comments, I got a little down in the dumps. I was thinking why in the hell are you attacking me? I'm just stating my opinion. If you don't like my comment...well....don't comment. Or better yet, don't insult me; engage me in some constructive dialogue to see where I'm coming from.....geesh. I can agree to disagree, but I can't stand cowards who hide behind their computers and belittle people......

That is when it starts being rude. It like some ppl just cant stand for anyone to have a difference of opinion. That is also why I still approve each comment on my blog. I can't stand seeing ppl be rude to others. It's doesn't bother me if you don't agree but it's the hate that I can't stand.

Don't let them deter you from being you and leaving the comments you want to leave.
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