Is relaxing ever a healthy option?

I've been thinking about relaxing lately. I love my curls so much, but I'm just wondering if being natural fits my personality. I love the curls and the big hair look, but it's not feeling natural to me anymore. I transitioned for almost 2 years and have been natural for 6 months. I want something that can let me go with how I feel any given day--curly, straight, pulled back, headband--and at its current length (chin length stretched), I don't have a lot of options. I don't have the ability to blow it out myself (totally not coordinated enough to get my whole head straight!) and with this humidity, when I get it blown out professionally, it reverts back before I get home.

I feel like with all the knowledge I have now, I could definitely maintain a healthy head of relaxed hair, but I'm scared that I'll make a big mistake by relaxing in the first place. Anyone out there relaxed and maintaining healthy hair? Anyone relaxed and regretted it? Is there something in between relaxing and staying natural (I did the keratin treatment and it just loosened my curls)???

I think about this a lot and honestly, my hair has always been healthy even with the relaxer. I know that the chemicals are not good for your hair, but since i was 11 when my mom first relaxed my air, til two years ago, my last relaxer, i always had bouncy healthy hair. My daughter attempted the natural thing for two years and recently relaxed again. I had mixed feelings about it, but i wanted it to be her decision. She got her first "real" hair cut and she hasnt looked back since. So i really feel to each her own.

sounds like you are thinking it would be easier to make relaxed hair curly than to make curly hair straight? 30 months is a long time to be at something.

mahogany curls has a you tube video on how to make natural hair become straight and bouncy. she uses big rollers. i think you could do it without a hair dryer but I'm not sure.

to each their own. i am not a fan of the premise of relaxing hair, but it is very possible to keep a healthy head of relaxed hair.

i can say that based on my experiences of taking care of my natural hair, that it would be even more consuming taking care of my hair relaxed. why? because if my hair in its natural state drinks water to no end (i replenish my hair with moisture everyday...almost twice a day) and my ends get drier in no time, then it would have to deep condition multiple times a week to keep my relaxed head healthy. and this is not a figment of my imagination because the proof is in the science: research shows relaxed hair needs 3x more protein and moisture compared to natural hair. don't believe me still? check out the blog keep it simple sista. the lady has beautiful relaxed hair, but she is on top of it like that oil in the marshes.

you said you have only been natural for 6 months....that is not a long time in being completely natural and so you didn't give it enough time. and you said with you wanted versatility with relaxed hair? were u able to get curls even when you were relaxed? in my experience natural hair has the most versatility: u can go straight, curly, pulled back, headband, etc all day long till kindom come.

hth

Thanks for your responses! I think you're right, HappyCurly: I think I feel that it would be easier to make straight hair curly than curly hair straight. I tried Mahogany Curls' rollerset advice and I looked like a crazy person, so I made an appt to get a rod set professionally done.

I like your thinking, Summerbreeze76: I have to do what makes me feel good. I don't know if straightening it will be the answer, which is why I'm going to try going to some natural hair salons first to get some professional advice.

i had this battle for years since going natural. its been four years now. i never gave in to getting a relaxer again, i have nightmares about relaxing my hair lol, its like i would be letting my hair down... anyways, like i said i have felt like this before. what keeps me going is that when i want my hair to be nicely straightened i got to the salon, but when i want to do oother things i still can without worrying that mytwist wont look right because of straight ends.

when i relaxed my hair i didnt take as good care of it as i do now. but i think that as long as you take good care of your hair, relaxed or not it wiil be healthy

I agree with DaJewel. It's possible to have healthy relaxed hair, but it would take alot of work. Furthermore, even if you hair is healthy, I'd be more concerned about the continued use of chemicals. There are many reasons to not get a relaxer. If it's only about the hair then it's just a matter of choice. Personally, I do not like the fact that a relaxer is sodium hydroxide (a very stong basic chemical) is being put onto my head. And if it needs gloves to be applied because it's bad for your hands, how can one deny the harm it's doing to your scalp. And a relaxer is physically painful. I can't think of any other situation where one would induce physical pain by choice. When you think about it, it's quite absurd.

But to each his own. Like I said. If hair is your only consideration, then the answer to your question is yes. But I also agree that natural hair is more versatile. You could always press it or get a Brazilian blowout if you desire to have it straight.

Not my head.

If you really feel this need to go back to the crack, then try texturizing, or stretching your relaxers. I think the other ladies have given good advice, but if that is not enough then what I've mentioned would be my suggestions. But I would give it a little more thought. You've been transitioning a long time, but it's possibly not for everyone.

I would consider it very carefully as well. As much time and money as you spend to make your hair look good now - multiply it. Then multiply again, especially if you want length.

The main difference between relaxed and natural hair is the cuticle. wiki entry on relaxers.

This means you can have long hair, full and shiny, but if relaxed it is damaged - by definition.

I will only say this much more - I had to update my Body Shop profile the other day - I removed the "Dry Damaged" description and chose "Normal" for the first time in my life. I can't tell you how that feels.

Take your time to think about it.

Relaxers again? for me ...No ma'am!
Is there a healthy option on relaxing? Hard to stomach ... especially thinking of the responses above and when i educated myself on what REALLY happens with a relaxer on your head - not to mention the maintenance to keep it healthy ... and the cost of that maintenance ... don't get me started! LOL
I always say to each his own, but personally I can just deal with straightening (when i get the courage too, I'm too scared of heat damage) if I want to at a later time. My hair is SO coily that I already know what will happen ... it will either revert or probably get damaged to hold the style, per say. So I am just going to deal and hang with what it does naturally.
Anywho, also to respond to watching the You Tubers, I love so many people on there, including MahogneyCurls, but sometimes although their techniques definitely work and come out great BUT reality is they may not work on your hair texture. So don't let that discourage you.
I think you are just at a point that we all have been and that's "at a loss" of what to do with your hair right now.
My advise is to reach down and remember what was the main reasons you went natural in the first place and hold on to that especially if that will encourage you, and don't rush it. Research, research, research and be patient with your beautiful kinks, coils, waves, or whatever ya got!

Healthy hair is relative. And my answer would be bias, seeming that im on this beeaaautiful natural journey. lol. But Healthy for you, is what you want. Dont throw in the towel because its hard, but if you truely dont want to be natural, then by all means! Changing your mind is not a crime. Give it alot of thought though, I've heard regret stories from people who backslid! Hope it works out, let us kno what you decide.

If it was possible, I wouldn't be transitioning.

Thanks, everyone! I got a rod set on Thursday and I'm happy with the results--nice curls, no frizz (it's supposed to be humid today, so we'll see!) and minimum maintenance, which is exactly what I need right now. My stylist said she has a lot more ideas (including a longer keratin treatment) before she'd let a relaxer touch my head, so I think I'll make it through the summer.

Fingers crossed! I really appreciate all of your words of encouragement!

I am glad you will have the summer to learn more about your fabulous hair! Sounds like you have a great stylist!! Enjoy the transitioning styles. Virtually every style I have seen transitioning can also be done on natural hair too.

Hey. In my opinion it is up to you completely. If you want to relax go ahead. My hair is very thick and the reason I am trying to go natural (7 to 8 motnhs so far) is because I just want to at least eb able to say I tried to deal with my own hair. Also, I don't like doing my hair that much, and with a relaxer that causes damage. My hair is healthier when natural and can endure more pain. I love to dye my hair so I figure beign natural will be better instead of dye plus relaxer.

I honestly think everyone should try to be natural because it is our Godgiven hair. You love your natural hair so if you do a relaxer it will not be because you hate your natural hair but because you want something different which I think is perfectly fine.

Hmm why not just try a straight sew in weave?