Is 4b/c Hair Frowned Upon?

WOW, I wasn't expecting so many comments! Thank you so much, each and every single one of you! You all made me feel so much better, it feels like weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I read each comment, and I feel so touched right now.

God bless you all! I am so thankful

I agree with all the other post! There are pros and cons to everything and everybody. It hurts me reading your post because we all need to come together and accept everyone's beauty without the media telling or dictating us to. Love yourself, all of yourself!

tiashauntee wrote:Jiggaboo?!?!?!?....that's taking it way back to Spike Lee's 1988 School Daze. Your hair needs to be more concerned about getting herself up to date.

Self-hate really annoys me and that's what I believe is the cause for people talking so bad and hating so much that there are people that love the way that they were born.

I know....just a way to keep people down. They probably don't realize that the things they say can affect a person's self-esteem.

I'm echoing everyone else. I don't really care what anyone else thinks about my hair and neither should you. That's a major problem. Black women are the only ones who can't wear their own hair within or outside their brethren without getting criticized. It's a centuries old issue and I believe we are changing that perception one curl, nap, kink, coil at a time.

I am also in the 4 category and am doing my BC next week. I also heard negative comments when I told people I was going natural. My 13 year old son even said "Mommy" don't do it you don't have good hair. I was shocked My husband loves natural hair and I have always envied women with big fros , I used this as a learning experience for my son and pointed out he had hair just like mine and it looks great, I even use some of the tips from this site on his hair and it looks better than it ever has. The point I am making is that I have never bought into the "good hair" "bad hair" theory and my son still made that comment. I definitely sat him down and had a talk with him about hair and how as a black man he needs to appreciate black women with all types of hair, not just what he sees in music videos:(. I also made him look at women with natural hair on the internet and he loved some of their hair. He even told me last week that a girl in his class had natural hair and it was "tight" He said I told the girl my mom is going natural to. As the mother of a son I feel even better about showing him that natural hair is beautiful. You will look beautiful no matter what type of hair you have.

tiashauntee wrote:I have all the 4's in my head and I love my hair! It's not about what "they" think it's about you because at the end of the day you are the one that gets the pleasure of enjoying your hair. No one's hair is "too nappy" and that is the most ignorant hair comment that anyone can make. Just plain hateful and stupid - and you can tell them I said it, it's true.

Take a look at these lists of lovely 4's:
http://maneandchic.blogspot.com/search/label/Type%204
http://maneandchic.blogspot.com/search/label/Type%204%20Hair
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/forums/showthread.php?t=419684

Hair typing is just another device used to keep us divided.

I adore you Tia!! Tell it!

I can completely agreed with everyone. I know exactly how it feels. For my entire life my hair has been called nappy, brillo bad, you name it, I've been called it. If my hair wasn't pressed it was in extensions. Eventually I got tired of it and took things into my own hands. I wish I'd know about site like this in HS. Fast forward to the last family gathering that I went to and my hair was in twist-out. Needless to say my aunts couldn't stop staring and asking me questions about my hair. They are older Caribbean women that were raised to believe that the straighter your hair is the better. Surprisingly the men in my family don't care as long as it neat and clean. Well that night my hair wasn't straight at all. It was clearly kinky and "nappy" but they were fascinated that I had transformed it into something beautiful.

That being said, I know it hurts when your own family doesn't support you, but once you get past the awkard phase of styling and caring for your hair things get a lot better. Surround yourself with positive people. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] They don't all have to be natural but they should be supportive of you. Life is already difficult, you don't need those closest to you wearing you out.

I love what everyone is saying.
I don't think it's frowned upon as much as ingrained misunderstood. It's unfortunately in our history, media, and all around us for years as negative.
Hold your head up - my common response (mine is in the 4's, but I honestly hate typing ... because I think my texture is just plain ol unique!) is: This is what God has growing out of my head so I am accepting it. And I know He didn't make a mistake here.
And I promise, I get looks of either reflection or a quick "walk away".
Get familiar with your own texture, learn what works for it and keep it healthy and you will be surprised at the people who will creep up and ask for either advice or give the compliments, but even if they don't, like the poster above said, "Your black (including your hair) is beautiful".

Kbelle

I'm really loving all this posts! I must say that I also had a lot of issues with my natural hair before I started wearing it open. Even when I came to this page.. seeing öike nikkis hair I though my hair texture is not the "pretty" type but meanwhile I don't give a damn on what the society thinks or whatever..! The fact is that this is the hair God placed on my head and I appreciate! I would also appreciate it if it were type 1,2 or 3!

NewYorkUptownChick wrote:WOW, I wasn't expecting so many comments! Thank you so much, each and every single one of you! You all made me feel so much better, it feels like weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I read each comment, and I feel so touched right now.

God bless you all! I am so thankful

You've come to the right place to get all the support you need! You have nothing to worry about. We've all met some type of resistance when we initially made this decision to go natural. Some of us may have received harsher comments than others, but you have to do what makes you happy and what brings you peace. None of us regrets our decision to embrace our God-given texture, and neither will you. It's more than just a change in your appearance. It's a self-transformation into the woman you are meant to be. So stick with us! We'll be your cheerleaders and keep you encouraged as long as you need us!

I have not done the big chop yet, but I am feeling the love on this thread. Vthis has really been a blessing to me to read all of the positive comments.

I think it is, that's why so many people especially on youtube aren't claiming the right hair type. Which is in turn leaving the rest of us confused. I still can't figure out my hair type from what I have seen on youtube. Need to send a pic when my hair is out of this twist set so I can get some honest answers .

No offense to anyone but I think hair typing is dumb. When I first starting researching how to care for my hair nothing worked for me that was suggested by those that supposedly had similar hair types. I really think that it's a pointless classification process.

tiashauntee wrote:No offense to anyone but I think hair typing is dumb. When I first starting researching how to care for my hair nothing worked for me that was suggested by those that supposedly had similar hair types. I really think that it's a pointless classification process.

Yeah! What Tia said regarding the whole hair typing thing!

You guys are right about that, they say its for you to know the right hair products to use, but I really think its just another way for us to argue whose better than the other.Plus I like the product I use and no matter whatever else I try I aways end up going back to that same product.

I love the pictures of the model.

I have little, tight, cork screw curls growing now, and they are gorgeous. I'm still figuring out how to comb them, but I love them. Our hair is curly and strong, not nappy or kinky.

It took me some months to realize this:

Your own hair, the way it grows out of your head, just like how God made it, can't be anything other than beautiful.

@ HappyCurly - you comb your curls when they are soaking wet and/or loaded down with conditioner. Dry combing is a Big NO NO [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]...OUCH!!

THanks Lynnieluve! I'm still transitioning, it's hard not to comb my hair every day! I can't wet it down every day to do it. I've got to accept that some days, just fingers will have to do!

Lynnieluve is right. The good news is once you big chop you won't have to comb every day. Your hands will have all the skills!

I know I'm in the 4 category still trying to figure it out though. Anyway you can't listen to people. I will say that usually when people are calling hair nappy or being negative they are usually referencing hair in this category. It's not the hair people talk about if you go by that old school idea of "good hair". So I guess to answer your question it is by SOME people. Like most things in life you have your haters and your celebraters. Listen to those who have a more enlightened understanding about embracing all textures.