Hair Woes ...

Ok, so I've been holding off on venting my frustrations because I've been trying to be a big girl and just deal with it. But ... I'm really at a loss.

I'm almost 5 months into my transition. Medium length hair (closer to short than medium in my opinion, but I'll say medium). I think I'm somwhere between 4b and 4c as far as hair types go.

Dilemma 1: I have no idea what to do with my hair and my patience is wearing thin. Last week I did a bantu knot out that took FOREVER, but turned out effective. I did it again yesterday and didn't realize it took 3 years to dry. (Last time I did, sat under the dryer for awhile, went to bed, woke up, and it was dry.) So, I spent HOURS yesterday on my hair for it to be shot to crap because the hair wasnt dry enough and the hubby and his best friend were waiting on me so I had to brush it all out and just pin the crap up in the back. Sooo ... any suggestions for someone who doesn't have magic hair hands? And doesn't have hours on end of free time to just sit under the dryer. I tried a perm rod set but it didn't turn out very good. I'm thinking it's the size of the rollers I used, but I haven't had the patience to try it again.

Dilemma 2: How do you guys get your hair to feel soft more than a day at a time. I just co-washed my hair yesterday. I did a hot oil treatment prior to washing. Yesterday, despite the lack of a style, my hair felt incredibly soft. Today, I can tell it's on the way back to dryness. I sleep with a satin bonnet. Everyday I try to shoot some kinda oil in my hair to salvage it, but it seems like it's no use. Any ideas?

I'm sincerely sorry this is so long, I'm just at a loss (not to mention I just talk a lot ... lol). I don't have the courage to BC just yet and I'm trying to wait until after the holidays to cough up the $200 to get my hair braided. I literally DID NOT want to leave the house yesterday after the hair catastophe, but the hubby said he wasn't going without me. So ... I came to the only place I know that might be able to help.

Thanks in advance!

Hey Jessi! Don't stress! Transitioning is hard. In fact the whole reason why I ended up doing the BC is because I was only doing ponytails, nothing looked right on my hair anymore. Now I live in twists!

Have you tried a twist or braid out? You have to let your hair dry so save some time to allow your hair to do this. This is key. Don't style your hair in a rush, and utilize your dryer. Read a book, watch TV, lots to do while sitting in place lol. Can you put your hair in a bun? I didn't do this (because I can only do ponytail buns. ), but it's a simple and quick style that looks great. Also try flat twists or braids (cornrows). You can do them yourself, or if not, find someone who can. You can rock the style a few days, or however long, and then take it down and rock that style. There's also simple hats or those crochet beanie hats that you can wear covering your hair. Also, by a scrunching product apply it and scrunch your relaxed hair. Depending on how much new growth you have this style can turn out great.

Here are some more links:

This first lady shows how she saves her "out" styles when they come out too wet: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUtgJ_vnAVA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx_oPzk7nRI

http://www.curlynikki.com/2010/04/transitioning-hair-style-ideas.html

http://blackhair.about.com/od/hairstyles/tp/transitionhairstyles.htm

Oil is great for sealing, but not really for moisturizing, though I guess it depends on what type of oil you use. I'm not sure how Hot Oil treatments work and I've never done one. But you will need to purchase a moisturizer that contains water as the first ingredient. Target is a great place to go to look and see if you find any products you'd like to try. Specifically, they have Curls for Target, and Shea Moisture. There's also online websites such as http://hairveda.com/default.aspx

I personally haven't tried anything from Hairveda but it's on my to do list, I just don't fancy buying things online too much.

If you believe that soft hair is how your moisturized hair feels than you may have to do it everyday or find a moisturizing product that allows you to do it less often.

HTH.

Have you tried curlformers? My curls look great and they are vented so my hair dries very quickly.

My hair was the same length as yours when I was transitioning. I used curlformers and magnetic snap rollers to style. I agree with josh'smom, my hair dried very quickly.

What products are you using? What is your routine?
IMO:
Step 1: Balance moisture and protein in your products (http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/278612/the_fine_art_of_protein_and_moisture.html?singlepage=true&cat=69)
Step 2 : do a ACV clarifying rinse (2 TBS ACV in 1 cup H20) to remove any product build up.
Step 3: shampoo with a non SLS shampoo ( there are many inexpensive ones such as TJ nourish spa, etc )
Step 4. Deep condition with a non SLS conditioner ( there are many inexpensive ones such as TJ nourish spa, Giovanni SAS etc )
Step 5: apply a good leave in conditioner, then seal with EVCO, or EVOO or shea butter
Step 6, apply styler
Step 7: repeat weekly

You guys are amazing! Thanks for all the helpful feedback.

So, it just so happens I went to Target today. I had been doing really good about resisting the urge to by products, but yesterday's panic pretty caused that to go to crap. I met a really nice lady in there who saw me looking at the kinky curly, miss jessie, and curls shelf. I ended up buying most of the kinky curly stuff (come clean shampoo, knot today leave-in conditioner, spiral spritz, curling custard) , but after seeing your response, I may take it back. I did buy the curls pomade to try to lay these sides down. I also bought the Cantu shea butter leave-in conditioner that a lot of people seem to use for their twists and stuff. I think I bought a curls moisturizer ... maybe I should go look through my bag of goodies ....

.... just looked in my bag. Yep .... bought the Lavish Curls Moisturizer. I'm supposed to be able to refresh my curls the next day.

As for my regimen. Although it's been almost 5 months since my last relaxer, I didn't start really dealing with my hair until .... ummm ... mid- to late-November because I was wearing braid. So, that being said, my 'regimen' is sort of a work in progress. I tried the Carol's Daughter Black Vanilla line. Hated it! Complete waste of my money for my hair. I went to a transitioning stylist 3 weeks ago and she did a perm rod set. I wore that for about a week. Then my roots started telling on me and started getting super dry, so I had to wash it.

That took me to last Wednesday, when I did the bantu knot out. I believe I washed my hair with Hello Hydration shampoo. I just did a once through with the shampoo (I'm having issues going cold-turkey on the shampoo). Then I conditioned with the HH conditioner and did a protein treatment with the ORS Mayonnaise (the stylist suggested I do a protein treatment because of my breakage). To try to prevent the crunchiness from protein treatment, I did a once-through with the ORS Replenishing Conditioner (I have honey and olive oil mixed in mine).

This week, no shampoo, just a co-wash. HH and ORS Replenishing Conditioner. I have a spray bottle of aphrogee and water to keep my hair wet while styling that I used. Oh ... I used that last week too when doing my bantu knot out.

Other products I use ... ORS Olive Oil (a creamy moisturizer), ORS coconut oil (feels kinda like a grease), shea butter (in a tube, kinda creamy, don't remember the brand and too lazy to go get it), castor oil, EVOO.

OK ... all done for now. lol I hope I didn't forget anything.

JessiWantsCurls wrote:Ok, so I've been holding off on venting my frustrations because I've been trying to be a big girl and just deal with it. But ... I'm really at a loss.

I'm almost 5 months into my transition. Medium length hair (closer to short than medium in my opinion, but I'll say medium). I think I'm somwhere between 4b and 4c as far as hair types go.

Dilemma 1: I have no idea what to do with my hair and my patience is wearing thin. Last week I did a bantu knot out that took FOREVER, but turned out effective. I did it again yesterday and didn't realize it took 3 years to dry. (Last time I did, sat under the dryer for awhile, went to bed, woke up, and it was dry.) So, I spent HOURS yesterday on my hair for it to be shot to crap because the hair wasnt dry enough and the hubby and his best friend were waiting on me so I had to brush it all out and just pin the crap up in the back. Sooo ... any suggestions for someone who doesn't have magic hair hands? And doesn't have hours on end of free time to just sit under the dryer. I tried a perm rod set but it didn't turn out very good. I'm thinking it's the size of the rollers I used, but I haven't had the patience to try it again.

Dilemma 2: How do you guys get your hair to feel soft more than a day at a time. I just co-washed my hair yesterday. I did a hot oil treatment prior to washing. Yesterday, despite the lack of a style, my hair felt incredibly soft. Today, I can tell it's on the way back to dryness. I sleep with a satin bonnet. Everyday I try to shoot some kinda oil in my hair to salvage it, but it seems like it's no use. Any ideas?

I'm sincerely sorry this is so long, I'm just at a loss (not to mention I just talk a lot ... lol). I don't have the courage to BC just yet and I'm trying to wait until after the holidays to cough up the $200 to get my hair braided. I literally DID NOT want to leave the house yesterday after the hair catastophe, but the hubby said he wasn't going without me. So ... I came to the only place I know that might be able to help.

Thanks in advance!

Hey, I was struggling with some of the same issues. I don't know my hair type, I just know the curl is SUPER tight, the shrinkage is severe, and my hair does tend to be dry. Its almost APL at the longest point.

Dilemma #1:
I am still having problems with this too. However, I have found that doing my hair at night alleviates A LOT of my daily stress. With it being cold, more times than not my hair is in twists under a crocheted hat anyway, lol. I only take my twists, bantu knots, or whatever down for an occasion. Shoot, if you're in a rush, go ahead and use your dryer! Just make sure you apply a heat protectant before hand and don't make it a habit to apply constant heat. I mean if you have some extra time one day, you may just wanna experiment and see if you can find some nice "go to" styles. I surely will be doing that tomorrow if I don't get my cornrows done!

Dilemma #2:
Oil does not impart moisture. Only water can do that. However oils can NOURISH the hair. I did a LOT of research on different oils etc. trying to figure out what I wanted to use during my transition. Only a handful of oils actually penetrate the hair, coconut oil and avocado oil are a few. To keep this from getting too boring I will just tell you what has worked so far for me. Less is more for me. I ALWAYS spritz water on my hair before adding anything else. Then I apply coconut oil and either the Cantu Leave in or Aphogee Leave in spray to the length of the hair (You DON'T need a lot & be sure to show love to your ends). I am currently using EVOO to seal. My hair stays soft and moisturized for a couple of days. When I feel like its getting dry, I do it all over again. I spritz my twists with water just about every day. I don't mind that they swell some because they twists look more like 2nd day hair when I take them out. Do continue to sleep in your bonnet, I do think that helps retain moisture instead of soaking it up. Right now I am using castor oil on my scalp and it has done quite well. No flakes or dryness. <<---- I know you didn't ask about that but it works for me so I am sharing, lol. Btw way, when you're using rods, make sure you use those little end papers. They'll protect your ends and help it dry better. HTH!

Don't stress! It will get easier. I'm almost 9 months post and months 5 & 6 were torturous!! But I'll tell you...after month six, things became a lot easier. Try styles that last during the week...buns, braid n curls or rollersets --- that way you can take your mind off of your hair for a while. All in all, be patient with your hair... It will get better! Best wishes :-)

Hey Jessi! Glad you went shopping. I would try the KinkyCurly and see if it works for you. Besides me purchasing some Shea Moisture products which are $9.99 each usually, I was kinda of even skeptical to purchase that because I don't like to spend too much money on hair products, so I haven't tried KinkyCurly because of price for the size, but a lot of women like the products, so try it out! You may like it.

I hope you got some great advice and can get a hang on to your styling issues.

Hang in there! Experimenting with different products and styles can be time consuming, but really pay off once you master a style and settle into a regime. Rollersets have become my staple when not in braids. They also hold well during work outs. The key is to cover the roots!

So ... an update ... I'm under the dryer now with the perm rods. I was feeling a little more patient today, so I figured I'd give it a try. I've decided that I'm pretty moody ... lol. Yesterday I told myself I was going to do perm rods, but after putting 2 in ... I was like "this isn't gonna happen". Today, I went to the bathroom thinking flexi rods, but ended up doing perm rods. Pray for me, ya'll ... lol.

Anyways, I figured I'd try the Kinky Curly. After reading a couple of threads on here, I did the following:

Shampooed with the Come Clean (because people say that if you put KK on top of hair with product in it, you get white stuff in your hair)
Put in the Knot Today and detangled
Parted the hair in 4 sections
For each section, I squirted it with water, then "sealed" with EVOO
Before rolling each piece, I applied the custard

I think it's going to come out a little puffy because most people use the custard when they're 100% natural to enhance their curls, but I wanted to try to do the whole process w/ 1 line of product to see what happened.

Anyhow ... if it doesn't work out ... I also bought hats while at Target. lol

Yay! I want to know how the perm rods turned out for you. My Stylist put my Flexi rods in on my transitioning hair - Lord knows I couldn't have accomplished that if someone else didn't do it, and I believe I got a good week and a half out of it. So I hope your perm rod set lasts just as long for you!

JessiWantsCurls wrote:Anyhow ... if it doesn't work out ... I also bought hats while at Target. lol

LOL! Girl you are a mess! Sounds like it should turn out well! Just make sure its completly dry before you take em out. Be sure to post pics of how it turns out!

OK ... soo ... I really like this Kinky Curly stuff. My hair feels pretty soft. It formed the curls. My roots are kinda puffy, but I expected that because it seems that most people use the custard for "curl popping," not for setting. It could also have a lot to do with my lack of skill. I'm curiuos how it would work on a knot out. I may try that next week so that I can go to sleep on the knots and hopefully wake up to dry hair.

Sooo ... outside of puffy roots, I'm ok. I'm not afraid to leave the house this time, so I can put the hat away. lol

@Tiff, I would love to post pics but I can't find my memory card reder and the blown Christmas budget won't allow the purchase of a new one until January.

Well, I'm glad everything worked out! I'm sure with a lil more practice you'll be able to do this in your sleep! Lol, now go forth and be fierce!

I'm glad to see it worked out for you. Can't wait to see some pics!

That is all I wear Is buns and fake pony tails.. I can cornrow just never have the time and when I do they don't last long maybe 1 week if that.. I know your styling issues.. During the winter months I don't want to wear my hair out that much anyway but seeing your post I may try some new styles also