{Trim and Grow}

When I first started growing my hair out I knew that a BC was going to be in my near future, but my hubby had a different plan in mind altogether. He wasn't ready to see me with a fade and honestly, I wasn't so sure that a TWA would work for me.

{let me say this, I know its my hair and I can do with it what I please, but our marriage works with compromise so that's what I'm trying to do here}

So we compromised. I'm going with the grow and trim plan...for now. Basically, for every inch or two of new growth , I'll remove the same amount of relaxed hair. No set schedule really, just as it comes. I"m a little over 5 months post relaxer and have between 2-2.5 inches of new growth at this point, so today I'm having about an inch trimmed off all around.

Is anyone else transitioning this way?

A few pics of my growth thus far:

Last relaxer, October 2009
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Straightened for a length check, February 2010 (very low heat!)
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Wet texture with relaxed ends
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Additional info: I've been wearing micros and cornrows as protective styles to help with the transition. Im having micros done again on Monday so thats why I'm trimming my hair now, so most likely, the trims will come between protective styles.

That is exactly how I am transitioning. I put a full-head sew-in last week and my stylist trimmed an inch and when I get it taken out the first week of April I will have her trim another inch. I am almost 5 months post and I dont wont to BC until December of this year so I will be in protective styles 95% of the time. I agree with you Hair2Me even though it is your hair your husband still should have some type of say in it...whenever I get married I will definitely want the lines of communication open and be open to compromise.

Morning Ashollan! Its great to know that Im not alone in my process Im hoping that the frequent trims promote healthier hair and growth. I see your in Indy, have you found any natural hair stylists in that area?

That sounds like a great plan Hair2Me and Ashollan. My husband had to compromise with me as far as me going natural in the first place because he didn't like the idea at first. I was talking about the bc all the time and I don't think he knew what I was talking about or not really listening because recently he was like what are you talking about bc you cutting your hair off. Well I guess I will have to compromise with him on this part even though I am soo ready to bc.

I am thinking about getting a sew in on tues haven't decided yet but if I do and I like it I might be joining you in this transition process. I can't do the braids right now because my edges are still growing back from the chemical damage [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] .

It seems to be working well for you. I can't stop touching and looking at my new growth [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Same here, and if I dont leave it alone, I'm sure its all gonna fall right out!

My husband is okay with me being natural, he just doesn't LOVE the idea of me with a mini fro. We've been together for 9 years so I know that hes accustomed to seeing me a certain way and I have to remember that it is a transition for the both of us. If the weather here wasn't so cold a sew in would be ideal, its actually my next protective style after I remove the braids. I had some breakage around my edges with micros before but the last time I kept them moisturized with a shea butter and coconut oil mix and made sure not to over style or exert the hair around my edges. This helped a lot.

@Hair2Me. My regular stylist and the stylist that does my sew-ins are both natural. They are newly natural but they are learning but my regular stylist really took care of my relaxed hair and she definitely promotes healthy hair. Although once I become fully natural I will not be going often...maybe every 3 months for a trim and blowout. Have you found a natural hair stylist in your area?

Not yet unfortunately but I haven't done much research either. I live in Gary so I'm close enough to Chicago if I cant find one out here. Sounds like we have the same plan, I dont think I'll be in the shop that often either. Heading to my regular stylist now and I'm taking my own sulfate free shampoo just to be on the safe side.

Hair2Me, I am not doing a BC...I cringe at the thought of just chopping off all my hair....because it is still my hair wether it is relaxed or natural. It's been about 6 1/2 months for me at this transition stage and I am enjoying every minute of it. I plan on just growing my natural hair out until it reaches my collarbone...so I have a long road ahead. Dealing with the two textures is not a problem for me as I try and do styles that will give me the minimum amount of time being spent on my hair. Braids, sew-ins, half wigs. (Making sure to keep them moisturized and not tight. In between those times, I wear my hair out for about two weeks just to breathe. ) People trying different styles/products is not that appealing enough for me to try the same thing...this is what works for me, my life, and my hair. Whatever reason people decide to BC..that's up to them and frankly a decision that you have to be well prepared for. Yes, I love the natural curls that are coming out now, but just like I heard someone say before...I have the rest of my life to be natural...so why rush?

I think you are making the right decision by compromising with your husband. Family first. Period.

I feel you Vakeshias. I will be weaved up or wearing a half wig for the rest of my transition. I refuse to do the BC until my natural hair is CB length. @Hair2Me...I used to live in Chicago and I went to Ylonn's Salon http://www.ylonnsalon.com/ My old stylist does not work there anymore but it is a really nice salon. Ylonn, the owner is an excellent stylist but is really hard to get on her book. Also Honey Child Day Spa had excellent stylists there too.

Good luck with your transition, sounds like a good plan. Do what feels comfortable to you.

ashollan, the key is to find people that are like minded as well. I like visiting fotki's or youtube videos of people that transitioned long term. (and this is rare as well cause once you get the basics down, everything else is smooth sailing) Bc videos or similar tales of the like I stay away from....and I only visit transitioning forums. Good luck and I will be rooting for you all.

@vakeshias one thing that I have been thinking about with getting a sew in is keeping my hair moisturized...my edges broke off so the stylist said he would use a cap??? Do you use caps or just your hair? I have had a sew in before but not with the cap and then I didn't want to sound stupid when I was in the salon (so i guess i will online [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] ) since you mentioned that you get sew ins what do you use to moisturize and how long do you keep yours in?

:butting in:

He may be referring to a net instead of a cap Mellowone. My stylist sews a net to my braids and then attaches the hair to the net and braids similar to this: [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

It helps to reduce the tension placed directly on your hair and also serves a protector.

Thanks everyone! My stylist cut an inch of and for the most part, the entire back of my hair is completely natural and is about 2 inches long stretched, 3 inches in other areas. At this rate, I should be 100% natural by the fall without a BC.

@Hair2me thanks for the pic. I haven't had a sew in since like two or three years ago so when he said that I was like what is he talking about.

Your welcome! I had one without it and the foundation didnt last as long.

MellowOne, I have used a cap before but find it easier to moisturize my hair and scalp without one. I normally leave hair out in the front and around the edges (the perimeter) and tree braid that part to blend it all in. Everything else is cornrowed and tucked in and the tracks are just sewn in to the cornrows. To moisturize I use Qhemets Kakardy Replenishing Mist. I normally leave the sew-in in for about 3 to 4 weeks (depending on the type of hair I use as I sometimes use synthetic hair and it can tangle something fierce) After I take it down, I let my hair rest for about 2 weeks (normally just doing braidouts).

vakeshias thank you

I plan on transitioning this way too. When my hair reaches bra strap, I'll start trimming away how many inches of new growth comes in. I want to maintain atleast bra strap length. So once I reach bra strap, I'll start trimming. I am now at apl. So hopefully i'll be bra strap length by the end of this year.

Keeping my fingers crossed.

As for protective styles, i'm just keeping away from alot of direct heat and i am decreasing hair manipulation. Sew-ins or braids aren't an option for me as I don't really like them.

Here are a few pics from after my trim. Doesnt look like she removed a lot but I guess an inch isnt much...
I was excited to see that most of the back was relaxer free!

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You hardly have any relaxed hair!!! You aren't tempted to just cut the rest of the relaxed part off...

MellowOne wrote:You hardly have any relaxed hair!!! You aren't tempted to just cut the rest of the relaxed part off...

Yess!!!! Lawd yessss!!!

I couldnt really tell the extent of the relaxed hair until I co washed it once I got home and was amazed at what little was left! Im still not entirely sold on a TWA and thats the hold up for a BC. I tend to be more of a casual chic and IMO, makeup and earrings are a constant for some rocking a TWA. So back into braids I go tomorrow. If I keep trimming off the relaxed hair I think I should be 100% natural by early fall.

*disclaimer* I love the TWA on others, but am not sure if its for me.

Yes, I wish I could do the braid thing because I am really having a time with not touching my head every min. I decided I would get another roller set tues because the way my head has been itching im not sure I would make it with that sew in [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] .

@Hair2Me I'm trimming and growing too. I had my last relaxer in Oct. 2009, so we're on the same plan it seems. I had a sew-in for about 6 weeks and was shocked at how much natural hair I had (in a good way). But, I did get a lot of hair falling out once the cornrows came out. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] I got a press and a trim and now I've just done my first co-wash after the weave. The roller set didn't look so hot, so I'm trying to recover with a twist-n-curl. I like your idea of cutting off as much relaxed hair as you have newly grown natural. I was just going to trim every month.