Frustrated with dry hair!!!!

by patmichele 20th October 2010, 10:52 pm

Hey ladies i need some help, encouragement, advice fast. I am so tired of my hair and ends being soooooooooooooooo dry i don't know what to do Mad

! i feel like i have tried everything. I've used shea butter, oyin's burnt sugar, sheamoisture hair milk, etc.... i have so much stuff it's ridiculous and I'm tired of it. I just cut 4 inches off my hair because i didn't like the way it felt or looked and my ends still feel dry. What is the problem?????? I can't figure it out and I'm tired of spending money (i'm sure my husband is tired of it too; i've taken over the bathroom!) on hair products and not getting the results that i'm looking for. I don't think i deep condition enough, maybe that's the problem????? My hair was never dry straight, as a matter of fact it was oily after 2 day of wearing it straight. I need advice on some tried and true was to ensure healthy moisturized hair. I love my natural curl, just want them to be healthy.

by naturallynola 20th October 2010, 11:35 pm

Pat, first take a deep breath. Be comforted to know that whatever the culprit, it is fixable. Every one here has had some issue with the hair. You did the right thing, pulling the fire alarm. Your response team has arrived. You say you have bought everything. If you have a routine, it would be helpful to know what it is (what you use, the products you use with it, etc.) Do you use a leave-in Also, any environmental/climate/weather/humidity changes. Moved and the water is hard, etc. Specify your shampoo/condish/stylers. Do they have drying ingredients? How have you been wearing your hair? When did you notice this change? Ends are exposed and very vulnerable. They rub against clothes. I see the products you have listed are oily. Do you use spritz, aloe, distilled water? It may be a case of the right shampoo, condish,(concentrating on the ends w/ condish), and adding a daily spritz and keeping your hair in a protective style so the ends can get a break. But, until we can get more specifics, its speculation at this point.

Just know, a ton of people will come to your rescue and encourage and empower you.

by FalconTress 21st October 2010, 12:02 am

naturalnolagirl1900 is correct, it's fixable and we need more info regarding your regimen & your environment. She honed in on the fact that you mentioned oil based products. It could be that in your effort to moisturize with these products you are actually locking moisture out.

What are you doing to lubricate and nourish your hair from the inside?
Are you drinking enough water? Eating enough fruit & vegatables? How is the rest of your diet? Are you getting enough protein(animal or plant), iron, B Vitamins & essential fatty acids. There are other nutritional requirements, but these are the ones that I thought of first.

Are you taking any medication?

You will get this situation under control. It will take some time to isolate the problem and resolve it.

by Free2Be 21st October 2010, 12:14 am

The conditioner is important. You have got to have a good, rich conditioner to help with the moisture problem. Make sure you're using enough. I'd recommend rinsing out the conditioner and then adding more, whether more of your rinse out conditioner or a product designed specifically as a leave-in. Again, make sure you're applying enough product so that your hair feels, well, moisturized. As it dries your hair strands will absorb the moisture. Then lock it in with oil or butter.

Have you been switching the products around a lot so that you're unsure which have actually been working or have been a part of the problem? Have you been able to tell the difference between sealing with an oil vs. a butter? All of that is important, imo.

ETA: I have no idea if we are the same hair type or not and imo, that's not important. But one thing I've noticed with my routine is that after tweaking my conditioner (which one, how I apply it in the shower and how I apply a leave-in) I can totally tell that my hair is much more moisturized. I don't have a dryness problem anymore and I did several months ago. Also, think about how you are drying your hair after cleansing or conditioning. Are you using a regular terry cloth bath towel or a t-shirt or some other smooth absorbent material? That has made a huge difference in how my hair dries after a wash/cowash and subsequent styling.

by patmichele 21st October 2010, 1:29 am

Thank you ladies....
Shampoo: Shea Moisture Moisture retention shampoo (pretty consistantly)
Suave Daily Clarifying Shampoo (maybe 1x wk).
Co-wash: Herbal Essense Totally Twisted
I have a variety of leave-in: Paul Mitchell the Conditioner, Rusk Smoother leave in conditioner, Garnier Leave in conditioner,
Conditioners: Carol's Daugther Tui Smoothie, Traders Joe's Nourish Spa, Shea Moisture Reconstuctor Conditioner, EO Rosemary and Mint weightless conditioner
Styler: Miss Jessie's Curly Pudding, Shea moisture hair milk, Carol's Daugther Hair Milk, Shea butter mix, Shea Moisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie, HH totally twisted gel, Mixed Chicks Leave in, Elasta QP Olive oil and Mango Butter
Oils: Unrefined organic Coconut oil, Jojoba oil, Olive oil
Butters: Shea
Do we see how ridiculous this is???????? I'm embarrassed Embarassed

I probably have more products (I only looked in 1 bathroom).
For the summer i pretty much wore a wng, but i have been doing braid outs more and i've been wearing a protective style for the past week (ends tucked). I like do like wearing my hair out as well though.
I don't really have a routine: wash, condition, leave in, and wear either wng or braid n curl. I usually seal with shea butter or Oyin burnt sugar.
I prob. do change products too often, looking for results or as a result of PJism....No medications, I live in Los Angeles (weather wise), def. should take better care of myself! I want to narrow my products down to maybe 3-4 products, if possible. I think my hair type, if it matters, is a mix of 3c/4a.

by Free2Be 21st October 2010, 2:56 am

I'm not a chemist or hair stylist, but the first thing that is waving a red flag at me is the weekly clarifying. I wonder if that's really necessary? Do you think you are getting enough build-up each week to necessitate the clarifying step?

I read the ingredients for the Suave Daily Clarifying Shampoo and while the description says it can be used daily without stripping moisture, I don't believe it. Not for black hair, kwim? Have you considered trying baking soda to clarify and follow up with an ACV rinse? Or simply reducing your clarifying to once or twice a month instead of weekly? You may see some improvement then.

*Also, I find that when I use MJ Curly Pudding, it makes my hair feel dry later on.

by ChrsLvsBks 21st October 2010, 3:33 pm

patmichele wrote:Thank you ladies....
Shampoo: Shea Moisture Moisture retention shampoo (pretty consistantly)
Suave Daily Clarifying Shampoo (maybe 1x wk).
Co-wash: Herbal Essense Totally Twisted
I have a variety of leave-in: Paul Mitchell the Conditioner, Rusk Smoother leave in conditioner, Garnier Leave in conditioner,
Conditioners: Carol's Daugther Tui Smoothie, Traders Joe's Nourish Spa, Shea Moisture Reconstuctor Conditioner, EO Rosemary and Mint weightless conditioner
Styler: Miss Jessie's Curly Pudding, Shea moisture hair milk, Carol's Daugther Hair Milk, Shea butter mix, Shea Moisture Curl Enhancing Smoothie, HH totally twisted gel, Mixed Chicks Leave in, Elasta QP Olive oil and Mango Butter
Oils: Unrefined organic Coconut oil, Jojoba oil, Olive oil
Butters: Shea
Do we see how ridiculous this is???????? I'm embarrassed I probably have more products (I only looked in 1 bathroom).
For the summer i pretty much wore a wng, but i have been doing braid outs more and i've been wearing a protective style for the past week (ends tucked). I like do like wearing my hair out as well though.
I don't really have a routine: wash, condition, leave in, and wear either wng or braid n curl. I usually seal with shea butter or Oyin burnt sugar.
I prob. do change products too often, looking for results or as a result of PJism....No medications, I live in Los Angeles (weather wise), def. should take better care of myself! I want to narrow my products down to maybe 3-4 products, if possible. I think my hair type, if it matters, is a mix of 3c/4a.

Free2Be wrote:I'm not a chemist or hair stylist, but the first thing that is waving a red flag at me is the weekly clarifying. I wonder if that's really necessary? Do you think you are getting enough build-up each week to necessitate the clarifying step?

I read the ingredients for the Suave Daily Clarifying Shampoo and while the description says it can be used daily without stripping moisture, I don't believe it. Not for black hair, kwim? Have you considered trying baking soda to clarify and follow up with an ACV rinse? Or simply reducing your clarifying to once or twice a month instead of weekly? You may see some improvement then.
*Also, I find that when I use MJ Curly Pudding, it makes my hair feel dry later on.

I agree with Free2Be, you may be clarifying too often. A couple of your stylers are known to cause dry hair. Although no head of hair is exactly the same, they may be the culprit. Check your products for lanolin, beeswax, mineral oil (paraffin liquidum, petrolatum) and ingredients ending in –cone or –conol or –ane. These are known to one, build up and two, block moisture. If you use them, you may want to do so after sealing in your moisture especially if the ingredients are in the top five.

Pat, believe it or not, you do have a regimen—cleanse, condition and leave in. When are you sealing in leave in? What are you using to seal?

You wrote you want to limit yourself to three to four products. Start now by using one cleanser, conditioner, leave in and sealer (oil or butter). Do this for at least one week and record how your hair looks and feels, take pictures if you can. I think using the same products at least three weeks is better so you can see what your hair feels like when wet with no product.

by Guest 21st October 2010, 3:38 pm

maybe u should try going to talk to a natural hair beautician or something b/c they will b able to tell you what u need and what u don't need and they can actually look at ur hair and see it for themselves

by patmichele 22nd October 2010, 5:29 pm

Thanks Ladies.... Does it really matter which you seal with oil or butter? What's the difference? Is one better than the other?

by makeupvixen 22nd October 2010, 7:05 pm

I see that you are here in Los Angeles with me. I learned about this place called Mahagony Hair Revolution in Los Angeles near Beverly Center. I haven't been yet but they are suppose to have experts with natural hair. I learned about them from another Curly Nikki subscriber at our recent meetup, maybe they can help. Here's their yelp link http://www.yelp.com/biz/mahogany-hair-revolution-los-angeles

Oh and I don't use Miss Jessies anymore, especially not now in this weather, it's too drying on my hair. I'm using Qhemet right now and what's left of my AfroVeda I've added Aloe Vera Juice and JBCO to so it's very moisturizing. I seal with either Vatika Frosting, JBCO, or Jojoba Heavenly Oil. Others just don't work on my hair, right now. Oyin works but it's too light for me with this off and on rain we are having.

You can try Qhemet in Los Angeles too, it's near Farmer's Market around the corner from 3rd and FairFax. It's an herbal and health market, the location is on Qhemets website. Qhemet has been a God send for me

by patmichele 5th November 2010, 7:14 pm

Hi ladies, I wanted to give an update on my "dry hair". I have stopped using so many products on my hair. With your help, i realized that i don't really moisturize my hair; therefore, I started spritzing my hair with water or a leave in (usually water) at night and sealing with a butter. I'm in a bunning challenge so i've been wearing protective styles as well. My goodness!!!!!! My hair has never felt better! I am not longer having an issue with my ends or my hair feeling dry. I am really happy with the advice iIwas given and think that spritzing and sealing with a butter was the trick! My only issue is I bought QP Elasta Olive Oil and Mango Butter; I really like it but it has lanolin in it. How bad is this for the hair? I've read good reviews about this product and I'm getting good results.
Makeupvixen... you and I must be in the same area. I'm in Ladera Heights and I do want to try the products you recommended soon. Do you feel the PJism in me? LOL

by Renny 5th November 2010, 7:30 pm

Hi Pat,

I notice alot of products with shea butter, have you ever considered that your hair might not like shea butter? Mine doesn't and it took it getting dry and staying dry for me to realize it.

I seal with oil, because butters are too heavy. It all depends on your hair. I have a mix of 3c/4a hair and my hair is fine. Yours looks fine in the AVI. If it is, consider that butters may be too heavy.

Chrs passed on some great advice about simplifying your products and watching to see what the result is. I had to do that and that's how I figured out shea butter was not my friend.

Oh and I have about 3 x more products than you listed. Lord help a sista!

by Cupcake415 5th November 2010, 8:52 pm

makeupvixen wrote:I see that you are here in Los Angeles with me. I learned about this place called Mahagony Hair Revolution in Los Angeles near Beverly Center. I haven't been yet but they are suppose to have experts with natural hair. I learned about them from another Curly Nikki subscriber at our recent meetup, maybe they can help. Here's their yelp link http://www.yelp.com/biz/mahogany-hair-revolution-los-angeles

Oh and I don't use Miss Jessies anymore, especially not now in this weather, it's too drying on my hair. I'm using Qhemet right now and what's left of my AfroVeda I've added Aloe Vera Juice and JBCO to so it's very moisturizing. I seal with either Vatika Frosting, JBCO, or Jojoba Heavenly Oil. Others just don't work on my hair, right now. Oyin works but it's too light for me with this off and on rain we are having.

You can try Qhemet in Los Angeles too, it's near Farmer's Market around the corner from 3rd and FairFax. It's an herbal and health market, the location is on Qhemets website. Qhemet has been a God send for me

I know this is off subject... But I'm in Long Beach... I will be checking this place out very soon!

by patmichele 5th November 2010, 10:29 pm

Renny- I have considered that; early into my journey. But I so want to like it. But maybe I should think about that one again. I just looked at the ingredients of the QP product I've been using and it doesn't have shea butter in it. My hair has been really soft and moisturized lately. What products do you use to twist your hair, if you do and what products work best for your regimen?

by Renny 5th November 2010, 11:55 pm

Coming to the realization that I could not use shea butter was devastating. LOL. Seriously, I was like how could I be that girl, but then I noted a lot of people can't and I just moved on. It was hard though.

I have yet to find the right thing to twist my hair with. I've been mostly wearing WNG's since I BCed in August. I've tried a few things but my hair is so fine it just looked a scalpy mess and it was always greasy.

I just finished twisting about an hour ago using a mix of 2 tsp of Aloe Vera gel and 2 tsp Miss Jessie's Curly Merengiue. I know Miss Jessie's has mineral oil, but I got the combination from Kimmaytube's video and honestly I'm not 100% sold on the no mineral oil stance, so we'll see how my hair comes out. I know my hair loves aloe vera gel so if it gets dry I know it's the Curly Merengiue. I have to say it feels great.

I plan to try two other products (Donna Maries Superbutter Creme and Curls Whipped Cream/Curls Goddess combination and if I can't get decent twist and a nice twist out from any of the efforts I'll be protective styling with Kinky Twist until my hair is longer.

If the QP is working, stick with it. It's on my list of products to try. It was recommended to me as a good substitute for shea butter, so I should add that to my list of products to try for twist too. I can get that at my local BSS.

by Sebastain13 6th November 2010, 12:06 am

Pat
I know how u feel I have the same problem w/dryness I have about 21/2 in of hair & it stays dry all the time I did not want 2 b a PJ but it was difficult bc I was tryng to find something that would help w/dryness I wash, cond, & dc wkly but my hair was still dry I think that Im going to stick wit this routine & use a product I just bought today Uncle Funkys Daughter Extra Butter I did some twist & may take the twist out tomorrow or Sunday My hair feels excellent now I hope it feels tha same when I take the twist out
I does get very frustrating bc u jus dont know what to do I was considering going to the barber to cut my hair down today but my daughter (who is natural) convienced me not to do it Im glad that I didnt
This is a great site to get advice & info but dont let it get overwhelming U will find out what works Hang in there

Laughing

by kinksncurls 6th November 2010, 1:01 am

Kind of off topic. But I just moved to Fullerton,CA, and was looking for a natural hair stylist so I may have to check out that place also.

I'm glad your problems with dryness are getting better!

by SummerSkye 7th November 2010, 6:59 pm

Congratulations (happy dance)!! I have fine hair and have come to realize that I don't need a lot of product. Not at all. If you get the moisture in and seal it in properly you're good to go. So happy for you!

by jeanlouisangel 8th November 2010, 10:22 pm

Hello Patmichelle...Girl do i know about dryness...aannnddddd dullness Sad

but I agree with all the ladies but I did find water and oils to seal help...and I also appreciate new found gem Qhemet biologics. They really help with moisture..but everone is different. I pray all works out because I empathize very much. Blessings flower

Be encouraged

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