Attitudes Rocking the Natural

Hey loves,

I'm new to this site and I wanted to post something. Ironically today something happened and I believe its share worthy. I would also love to hear feedback and other stories as well. Anyway...

I've been natural my whole life and dealt with trying to fit in with the "creamy crack" girls and hating my curls. But, you couldn't tell me nothing when my hair was in a ponytail and all you saw were waves lol. In my freshman year of college, I moved back to Chicago and was looking for a hairstylist who did natural hair. The hairstylist that I went to every other week kept my hair in top shape even between appointments before I made the major move. At the time my hair came to the middle of my arm and it was colored after prom.

I was able to find this woman who "loved" my hair and claimed that she would take care of me...WRONG! When I went to her shop, she chopped off all my hair to where I had only 2" on one side and 3" on the other. I wanted my haircut to start a dif. chapter in my life, but I wanted it cut into a long bob just above my shoulders. According to her, all my hair was dead, and screaming to be chopped. Of course I cried, felt alone and ugly.

With the support of my new college buddies, they encouraged me to wear my hair curly. It took a long time for me to adjust and feel beautiful again. Since it was short I tried various styles, but didn't trust another hairstylist again. I went to referrals only when I didn't feel like dealing with my kinks n curls. It wasn't until this year I decided to completely take pride of my hair and care for it.

Today actually, I did a twist out and pinned it because I was in a rush to get to work. One of my coworkers flatout told me my hair was ugly and if it was styled it'll be better. I laughed of course because clearly she doesn't know natural. Before and after she made her remarks, I was getting compliments about my hair and how cute it was curly.

I've said this to say, I've changed a lot since day one when I wore my hair completely natural in curls. I"m more confident and I feel that no matter what I do with my hair I'm beautiful. Like India said.."I am not my hair," but my black (hair) is beautiful!

Ok 1st of all what did her hair look like.. I swear the people we work with feel like they can say anything to you and that is it.. Maybe she was jealous and being a hater was the only way she could handle it. I had an ex co-worker who wore her hair in its natural state never curly which is fine but the problem was with her hair it was always dry no matter what and then she had to nerve to give me hair advice one day on how I should have worn my ponytail.. Now she is wearing weaves because she said her hair is breaking off and she don't know what to do.

Then another co-worker had a funny look on her face because I wanted to buy an afro ponytail. Her statement was you bought that.. I said sure did and plan on wearing it soon..

Great story..

Welcome to CN!

I'm glad you were able to overcome to your horrible salon experience and embrace your curly hair! All hair is beautiful!

WOW....she had a lot of nerve. You must know your co-worker very well. **sigh** you handled the situation very well.

I agree you have to have an attitude, be strong and not addicted to approval to rock natural hair.

Hi and welcome. I am from chicago too so tell me where that beautician is so that i will never go to her LOL. On another note, since i have been natural I have not gotten alot of love from the natural community here, so i know that the permies have alot to say. I guess I have been lucky that they have not said it to my face. At your age, I am glad you are strong in what you believe. Stay that way because people will try to do and say whatever to bring you down.

#somepeoplecanbesorude

Even when I was relaxing my hair I very much admired those who wore well-kept natural hair... I love it! It's beautiful! I don't understand how people can say something bad about it. I'm sure a lot of them are jealous, and then others are just ignorant. When you wear your hair big, you're going to stand out, but if you wear your hair big, throw your shoulders back and strut like you are the hottest thing alive, you will turn heads and raise eyebrows... People notice that and some say "attitude" like it's a bad thing, but I love it when I see someone who is proud to be who they are, especially when their self-love emanates from their pores! So, continue to hold your head high and love your hair for the statement it makes!

Welcome! Love the hair story. I am impressed too by the age at which a lot of ladies are embracing their curls (the younger ages) because peer pressure, even at the college level, is so tough to deal with. I hope that as more ladies wear their kinks, coils, curls, etc. it will become more the norm than an exception. Good luck to you!

OK so I have to comment on your dumb ass coworker. You're too nice...or I'm too mean, because I'd have reached into my purse, grabbed my compact and flashed it in my coworkers face saying, "So, THIS (pointing to her hair) is the epitome of style?" Not caring, of course, what her hair looked like, but making sure she felt the same shock I'd just felt listening to her uncalled for rude comment.

I am so appalled by all the stories ladies tell of coworkers actually commenting on their hair! What happened to 1) "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." and 2) Random coworkers who either don't share our hair vision, don't even KNOW us, and finally, can't take care of their own head of hair decide they are an authority on style? I can't wait for someone (coworker, nurse, librarian, bank teller, Taco Bell worker, etc.) to call me out on MY hair, cause they sure enough will get told about all of their flaws, real or imagined. Humph.

Confidence comes from within!! I love my hair and that's all that matters.. People have some nerve thinking they can say what they want. I was raised to give your opinion only when asked, and if you don't have anything nice to say don't say it at all!!!

*Your first post was awesome!!*

Hmmmm someone was jealous of your curls ...

Welcome. I'm sorry that happened to you.

I would be surprised if someone went out of their way to say something negative about my hair or anything else that was personal to me. I would have to assume they had their own issues; expecially if they felt the need to do that.

Free2Be wrote:
OK so I have to comment on your dumb ass coworker. You're too nice...or I'm too mean, because I'd have reached into my purse, grabbed my compact and flashed it in my coworkers face saying, "So, THIS (pointing to her hair) is the epitome of style?" Not caring, of course, what her hair looked like, but making sure she felt the same shock I'd just felt listening to her uncalled for rude comment.

Free2Be - You are my kind of gal. I don't know what I would have said, but she for sure would not have walked away from my office happy.

Free2Be wrote:Welcome! Love the hair story. I am impressed too by the age at which a lot of ladies are embracing their curls (the younger ages) because peer pressure, even at the college level, is so tough to deal with. I hope that as more ladies wear their kinks, coils, curls, etc. it will become more the norm than an exception. Good luck to you!

OK so I have to comment on your dumb ass coworker. You're too nice...or I'm too mean, because I'd have reached into my purse, grabbed my compact and flashed it in my coworkers face saying, "So, THIS (pointing to her hair) is the epitome of style?" Not caring, of course, what her hair looked like, but making sure she felt the same shock I'd just felt listening to her uncalled for rude comment.

I am so appalled by all the stories ladies tell of coworkers actually commenting on their hair! What happened to 1) "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." and 2) Random coworkers who either don't share our hair vision, don't even KNOW us, and finally, can't take care of their own head of hair decide they are an authority on style? I can't wait for someone (coworker, nurse, librarian, bank teller, Taco Bell worker, etc.) to call me out on MY hair, cause they sure enough will get told about all of their flaws, real or imagined. Humph.

Too funny. I would have paid to see her reaction to that!! Love it!!!

Hey.. welcome. that chick @ you job is hating..forget her.

Natural hair Rocks

Free2Be wrote:

OK so I have to comment on your dumb ass coworker. You're too nice...or I'm too mean, because I'd have reached into my purse, grabbed my compact and flashed it in my coworkers face saying, "So, THIS (pointing to her hair) is the epitome of style?" Not caring, of course, what her hair looked like, but making sure she felt the same shock I'd just felt listening to her uncalled for rude comment.

I am so appalled by all the stories ladies tell of coworkers actually commenting on their hair! What happened to 1) "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." and 2) Random coworkers who either don't share our hair vision, don't even KNOW us, and finally, can't take care of their own head of hair decide they are an authority on style? I can't wait for someone (coworker, nurse, librarian, bank teller, Taco Bell worker, etc.) to call me out on MY hair, cause they sure enough will get told about all of their flaws, real or imagined. Humph.

Thanks femmes....I appreciate the support. But, yea my coworker really has issues. I come from Chicago where there is so much hate its ridiculous! But, this quote above really made me LOL! I'm the type of person who doesn't like to fight fire with fire especially in a work place. But, ironically this girl really seeks my opinions about how to wear clothes and where I shop to buy shoes.

CrissyQ: I don't remember her name since is was back in summer 2007. But, her shop was off 11th n wabash downtown. I agree there isn't much support in the Chi for naturals. But, last wk they had a black womens natural hair convention on the west side. In my womans support group, we talk about issues like this and you are more than welcomed to join!

Much love

Please dont worry about what someone else thinks & Im glad that you had the strength to over look her ignorance & love u and who u are

Proud of you Keep rocking