Learning to Care for my Daughter's Natural Hair

Hello everyone! I hope that this can become a place for me to chronicle my experiences with natural hair, but most importantly to get help and advice.

My daughter, Keke will be 4 in December. Her hair is pretty tightly coiled. I am as blonde haired and blue eyed Northern European one can come, so it's safe to say that I had no clue what I was doing when I got started with my daughter's hair!

While there are many women in my husband's family who can help me with hair, none of them are natural. So I'm very excited to see a community like this.

A little background - we have a great regimen going that has made her hair very manageable. We use only natural/organic products. I have learned to do twists, braids and cornrows, so I'm doing a lot more protective styles now that she is in school and we don't have a lot of time to do hair.

I've posted a picture of my daughter below. My first question is about her hair type. I've always just assumed it's 4a because of how tightly coiled it is. However, I haven't really seen a picture or description online which I can say "yes, that's her hair." The picture is of her hair about 10 minutes after it's been washed and conditioned, then with some moisturizing lotion put in it, it actually does shrink up more than this when dry. Are you able to tell from the picture what her hair type is?

Hi and welcome. I am not good with hair typing so I cant say. i just wanted to welcome you and your daughter to curl street. I have a two year old and am not sure what her hair type is, all I know is that is thin and curly. It is great that you have a regime for her because i am still lost with her hair. Althought my daughter hair is not as thick as yours, but i would love to know your regime. BTW she is adorable.

welcome! your daughter is adorable! i dont really get into hair typing so i cant help you there. I have a 3 year old daughter (10month old son) and jut starting to get a routine for her hair

Your daughter is absolutely adorable. I'm not great with the hair typing system either but if I had to guess I would say a 3c/4a combo.

Also check out www.beadsbraidsbeyond.blogspot.com for info about little girls hair.

Welcome to CN! Your daughter is adorable. Another helpful site for children: http://www.happygirlhair.com/

Thanks for the welcome!

I've been reading Beads Braids and Beyond as well as Happy Girl Hair for a while now, and they've really helped me with my styling! I also read any natural hair blog that I can find.

The reason why this is so important to me (besides having my daughter look good) is that I want my daughter to love her hair! I don't want her to ever look at my wash and go hair and wonder why hers requires a lot more work. Plus, I'm fighting a lot of "bad hair" stereotypes and prejudices in my husband's family. I mean a lot. And I don't want them putting their issues on my daughter, but unfortunately she's already heard a lot. I have a 15 month old son whose hair is in the 2 type. So what we always hear is "oh don't you wish she got his hair and he got her hair, it would be so much easier for you."

Hello and welcome to Curl Steet your daughter is adorable! I like the fact that you're teaching your daughter to love her hair.

Hi Welcome!! Your daugter is a cutie!!!

Your daughter is adorable! I'm not 100% sure about her hair type, but I'd say a mixture of 3C/4A.

She is adorable and it sounds like you have some good suggestions to go with. Welcome to Curl Street!

This is the current regimen I have going with Keke.

Shampoo with Curls Curlie Cutie Cleansing Cream and Deep Condition with Curls Curl Ecstasy Hair Tea Conditioner - I do this once every two weeks, on a Saturday if I'm giving her a protective style the next day or Sunday if I'm not. I comb the conditioner through, put in a few braids, put on a heat cap and let it sit for 15 minutes. Then i rinse it out with the braids still in.

Co-wash with Curls Coconut Dream Conditioner about every 3 days.

I follow any wash with an application of coconut oil, then put in braids for bed.

Daily comb with Curls Moist Curls Moisturizer/Detangler.

Any styles I do, I use the Curls Whipped Cream for styling.

When she goes swimming (once a week) I dampen her hair, spray in some Giovanni Leave In Protein Treatment, then put on a swim cap.


As you can see I like the Curls product. They were the first line I found here in Canada that was natural/organic and for curly hair. I've tried other organic products that weren't specifically made for curly hair and I didn't like the results. This regimen and these products have made her hair so manageable. But now that I'm learning about different products and seeing that some of them are available here without going online, I'm willing to try others.

Here are my current goals:

-Find a better styling product. I like the Whipped Cream for when her hair is in a puff, but I'm looking for something else for when I do braids and twists.
-Keep those ends moisturized! She has very dry ends. They're getting healthier but they still need some more TLC and I'm not sure if this is a product thing or if they just need more attention.
-Figure out what I need to do for winter. We walk to school every day so she'll be out in the cold more and I don't want her hair to feel the effects. I'm thinking of deep conditioning every week, more protective styles and maybe looking for some other moisturizing products.

Welcome to the Curl Street Journal. Your daughter is adorable with a beautiful head of thick hair! All hair is good hair, and it's too bad that her father's family is already making her see her hair in a bad light. I'm glad you're trying to get her to understand otherwise.

I am not 100% accurate with hair typing, and have even guessed what my own hair types are (I will be updating my blog by tonight with my hair textures). I would say she's mostly 4b with 4a (There's coils in the back it looks like). HTH

You seem to have a good idea of what to do, looks like you've past the trial and error part already.

Have a good day.

I like Curls products for me and my girls too!!!

So my big problem with her hair right now is in the morning when I take her hair out of the sleep braids, it's hard and crunchy. A bit of water and detangler gets it right back to normal, but I'm wondering what I'm doing that would make it crunchy.

My theories are:
-I'm using too much coconut oil (I really don't think I'm using that much.)
-I'm braiding it too soon (it's not fully dry)
-Too many products (after co-wash I use detangler to comb again, then put in the coconut oil.)
-it's the leave-in conditioner with protein that I'm putting in her hair before she swims (she does wear a swim cap, but I wet her hair a bit and spray in leave in because water can still get under the cap.)

Any suggestions?

Oh my goodness, now I understand how women can become product junkies.

This past week I visited the HoneyFig (www.honeyfig.com) store here in Toronto. I was looking for a stronger product to use when I do Keke's twists and braids because they don't seem to be lasting long. (Any suggestions?)

I almost died. The number of products in there that I have read about online, and they are natural and organic! I wanted to bring them all home, but being that I'm a stay at home mum who takes care of the finances, I knew I could definitely not afford it (and I can sneak in small purchases without my husband noticing, but he'd notice if I came back to the car with large bags.) But I want to try it all!

I ended up coming home with the Qhemet Biologics Amla and Olive Heavy Cream. I haven't had a chance to use it yet since her hair was in twists this week, but I plan on doing box braids this weekend so I'll give it a try then.

I'm so jealous of my daughter's hair and these products aren't helping. When I was a kid I wanted curly hair so bad and I went to the salon to get a perm and by the time I came home the curls had fallen completely. I couldn't even get chemicals to curl my hair! So now I get to live through my daughter.

How cute, please take pictures of the box braids so we can see them.

Wonderful that you found a shop you love! I would also like to see the box braids. Have fun!

Oh, and about the twists, mine don't last long either, maybe try a twisting gel, or any gel really, and maybe they'll hold longer??? I haven't tried that yet. I just re did a few twists in my hair, but just with my AVJ mix and jojoba oil and Hawaiian silky. The only thing that happens is the back will frizz up, but they hold longer than the front does

kekesmum wrote:

I'm so jealous of my daughter's hair and these products aren't helping. When I was a kid I wanted curly hair so bad and I went to the salon to get a perm and by the time I came home the curls had fallen completely. I couldn't even get chemicals to curl my hair! So now I get to live through my daughter.

Hi and welcome to Curl Street. It's so great that you're learning to care for your daughter's hair. I have a few bi-racial cousins and friends and their hair was always a source of frustration for them. They even lamented that they wish someone had taught them how to care for their hair when they were younger.

Although I don't have the same texture hair as your daughter,I bet she'll appreciate the time you spent on her hair once she gets older. When I was 3 my mom had an accident leaving her with her limited fine motor control in her hands, needless to say combing two daughters' hair at night was a tremendous feat, but somehow she did it. Looking back it never stopped her from making sure our hair was washed and deep conditioned on a bi-weekly basis. The older I become the more I see how selfless it was to take care of our hair. Hey, she even got our dad to help out a couple of times, but we quickly begged to her tell him to stop, lol.

Neems - that is a great story about your mom, thanks for sharing it! I know my daughter loves her hair, she tells me so and I hope that she looks back at this time together as a positive thing.

I'm trying to get my husband to pay attention and learn what I do for her hair but he just brushes it off. I know in his head he thinks "if I ever have to be the one doing the hair, I'll just take her to my sisters." At which point everything I don't want done to her hair will be done! So I think I'm going to write down everything I do, step-by-step instructions as plain as possible and tell him that if I'm ever not here, I will haunt him if he doesn't follow my plans.

So, the box braids. Well, I didn't take a picture, and I apologize. I'm terrible when it comes to pictures. They turned out really nice, pretty even considering I have a terrible time with parting.

But...within only a day or two the top braids were fuzzy. I'm not sure if it's that she has new hair growth, or if she has breakage, or if I just did something wrong. I'm going to have to ask my friend about it. So I'm just trying to get creative with barrettes and headbands so I can stretch them out until the end of the week.

Lol Keke, I love how you said you will leave hubby detailed instructions.

Not sure what to say about the braids though. Hopefully your friend has given you some advice.

kekesmum wrote:So, the box braids. Well, I didn't take a picture, and I apologize. I'm terrible when it comes to pictures. They turned out really nice, pretty even considering I have a terrible time with parting.

But...within only a day or two the top braids were fuzzy. I'm not sure if it's that she has new hair growth, or if she has breakage, or if I just did something wrong. I'm going to have to ask my friend about it. So I'm just trying to get creative with barrettes and headbands so I can stretch them out until the end of the week.

your daughter is so beautiful!!

its normal for the braids/twists to be fuzzy after using a shealoe mix or sometype of combo of gel and condish while twisting. its just the nature of her hair. its probably fuzzy cuz of new growth. to minimize fuz i wrap my twists at night (just like people wrap when they perm or press their hair) and at least at moisture and seal to downplay the fuzzyness.

Can I just say how much I am in love with the Qhemet's AOHC? Like really in love!

I just took out her braids and her hair is so soft, I've never seen it so nice after braids or twists. Each day during the week I did but a bit of coconut oil on her hair, and on Wednesday after swimming I used our regular conditioner, then redid the ends with AOHC.

I didn't have to fight to get the braids out (a lot of time her hair tangles while in braids for a week) and her hair looks beautiful. I am so pleased with the product.

I think this week I'm going to cornrow the front and then go into two strand twists in the back. The weather here is cold now so it's definitely going to be protective styles from now on.

Hi & welcome!

Your DD is cute! Frizz is a major issue when my hair is in twists and braids. You can try to add a non-water based product to it at night before putting a scarf on her hair at night. Many get good results with shea butter. The Qhemets may help also since it is thick and creamy.

You sound like you have a great regimen for her. Keep reinforcing how great she and her is and she will grow up to be a confident young lady and woman.

How is her hair doing now? I read that her hair was a bit hard. It could be the coconut oil. It can solidify in colder temperatures and with walking to school this may do it.