NEED A NATURAL BIG SIS TO HELP WITH FIGHTING THE URGE TO RELAX

I STARTED MY NATURAL HAIR JOURNEY ABOUT AUGUST/SEPTEMBER 2009. I CUT OFF THE REST OF MY RELAXER IN JUNE 2010 AND THE RESULT WAS SURPRISING. I HAVE A REALLY NICE TEXTURE TO
MY HAIR, I THINK, AND HAVE ENJOYED THE FREEDOM OF MY "AFRO". I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HAIR TYPE I HAVE SO I CANNOT ANSWER THAT QUESTION. I HAVE BECOME FRUSTRATED BECAUSE IVE SPENT A LOT OF TIME, ENERGY AND MONEY TRYING TO INCREASE THE MOISTURE IN MY HAIR. WHEN I WASH AND CONDITION MY HAIR (USUALLY EVERY 7 DAYS OR SO), THE TEXTURE WHILE WET IS VERY CURLY/WAVY, BUT ONCE ITS DRY ITS ALMOST AS IF THE CURLS DISAPPEAR. IVE LOOKED AT NUMEROUS HOW TO VIDEOS AND TRIED JUST ABOUT EVERYTHING TO OBTAIN NOT ONLY MOISTURE BUT THE BEAUTIFUL CURLS I SEE WHEN I WASH MY HAIR. I AM CONTEMPLATING GOING BACK TO A RELAXER BECAUSE IM NOT SURE IF IM DOING SOMETHING WRONG...I AM REQUESTING A BIG SISTER BECAUSE I REALIZE THE DAMAGE RELAXERS HAD ON MY HAIR AND I NEED A BIT OF ADVICE ABOUT WHERE TO GO NEXT.....PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP BEFORE I MAKE A MISTAKE AND DO SOMETHING DRASTIC...

THANKS,
JESSICA

What products have you tried? Tell me your washing process.....You step in the shower, then....(you take it from here..products, what order you use them in, etc)

briana2k,

I experienced much of the same issues with my hair when I first BCed. I beg you to hang in there! I can understand the frustration of seeing curls after a wash, only to have them disappear after the hair dries. It will take time, but you are going to have to love your hair for what it does, not for what it doesn't do. If you still long for texture, try twist-outs. I did a bantu-knot set for the first-time yesterday and took them down today and now I have a cute curly afro. There are tricks to get the results that you long for, but the first step is to love your hair as is. I'd love to be a big sister to you! Believe me, I've been there.

Hi jessica,

We are here to help you avoid the calling of the "creamy crack"....fight the urge my sistah! If you can determine your hair type (not curl pattern), then you may be able to select product that can help for your hair. My hair is very fine and overly porous, which requires extra protein rather than lots of moisturizer. Before I realized this, I overdid it with moisturizers which resulted in no curl and weighed down hair.

Check out livecurlylivefree.com to get details on your hair texture, porosity, etc, as well as ingredients to use or avoid based on your hair type.

Hopefully this helps!!!

Mel

OMG!! I AM SO OVERWHELMED AND EXCITED WITH ALL THE LOVE I AM RECEIVING FROM YOU ALL! THANKS SO MUCH AND I AM DEFINATELY GOING TO DO MORE RESEARCH ON THE TYPE OF HAIR I HAVE (AND NOT THE CURL TYPE). AGAIN, THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT AND ADVICE.

BTW, HOW IN THE WORLD CAN I ADD A PROFILE PIC? SORRY, LADIES, IM A NEWBIE AT THIS...LOL

Click "profile" in the menu below the forum header, then click "avatar" , you'll find options to add a picture there.

LIVECURLYLIVEFREE.COM IS A GOOD WEBSITE. I WAS ABLE TO LEARN THAT I HAVE FINE (WHICH REALLY WASNT A SECRET) AND OVERLY POROUS HAIR. IT SEEMS AS THOUGH MY PROBLEM IS NOT THAT I NEED MOISTURE?? IM GOING TO CONTINUE TO READ BUT ALL THE LINGO IS OVERWHELMING SO IF ANYONE HAS ANY IDEAS OF WHERE I CAN START, AS FAR AS PRODUCTS ARE CONCERNED, IT WOULD BE APPRECIATED.

THANKS SO MUCH SISTERS!!

JESSICA

Jessica (my Curl Sister)

We are in the same boat! LOL! Protein, Protein, Protein! I do Henna treatments every 2 weeks(it's a protein treatment..the best ever). I'm actually steeping tea to mix up some now!

As a moisturizer, I use Extra Virgin Coconut Oil. It's light enough to use everyday, but will not weigh my hair down. I have realized that Coconut Oil is a great styler as well, so I don't use many gels or styling creams. I use a coconut oil/lavander/water spray as a leave-in, daily spray. Again, it's light and seals my hair enough to control frizz. This is my major styler.

I wash and condition with Phyto products (recommended by my stylist) it's pricey, so I'll be doing some research in order to switch to something with the perfect combo of moisture and protein, but not breaking the bank!

Also make sure you get/mix products with the right ingredients. Ingredients like, honey, aloe vera, veggie glycerin are humectants and draw moisture to the hair. For us fine, overly porous curlies, extra moisture is not needed. Therefore, I use them sparingly. Anti-humectants like coconut oil and shea butter, act as a sealant and repel moisture. Cocount oil, unlike shea butter penetrates the hair shaft to add moisture as well as seals it in.

Hope this helps! Keep the questions coming...we'll make sure you don't go back to the "crack" Because "Crack is Whack"...

MelMelBee wrote:Hi jessica,

We are here to help you avoid the calling of the "creamy crack"....fight the urge my sistah! If you can determine your hair type (not curl pattern), then you may be able to select product that can help for your hair. My hair is very fine and overly porous, which requires extra protein rather than lots of moisturizer. Before I realized this, I overdid it with moisturizers which resulted in no curl and weighed down hair.

Check out livecurlylivefree.com to get details on your hair texture, porosity, etc, as well as ingredients to use or avoid based on your hair type.

Hopefully this helps!!!

Mel

Very good info! The information on that website is very helpful. Thanks for sharing!

Thanks Diego2memphis! You know we have to keep "educated"