Family and Friends Reaction to Your Hair

When I told my mom that I was going natural she was so excited. She has been trying to convince me for years to leave off "those chemicals." She thinks this is a stepping stone to me locking my hair...well I wouldn't go that far lol, but I enjoy being natural.

My biggest complaints though have come from my best friend, who has been really negative. When I told her that I was going natural she was shocked, she said you're going to wear your hair nappy? I have seen girls who happily embrace "naps" but I knew that she wasn't embracing it, coming from her it was an insult. While video chatting a few weeks ago she saw my hair and went, "Wow, you look like a little black girl." I had to set her straight and let her know, that I have always been black. And that the purpose of a relaxer was not to be less black, and that if that was what everyone was trying to do then they should just give up the relaxer and go natural. Because the texture of your hair will not stop you from being black.

I feel like she takes my decision to go natural as a personal attack on relaxers. Hell I'm so contrary that if anything her attitude has motivated me to keep going, transitioning is hard lol! I can't wait to finish my transition, because I will be a BOLD NATURAL [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] !!!!

My family and friends were mostly supportive when I went natural (1st nappiversary was June this year!). It took my mother a while to get used to it, especially because started transitioning after she moved out of state too and didn't see it often, but she's never been negative. She's amazed at how much it's grown since I stopped perming it and completely loves it. I was mostly worried most about my 86-yr-old grandmother who, while never having a perm, has always had a press-n-curl. She really hasn't said much except for wondering at my twists; she never saw it out (lives in the same state as Mom but farther away and I see her less) and in it's full glory until this past weekend when I took my small braids out and let it all hang out. Good Lord, it was big. And boy, did she say something then. "Why don't you straighten it", "you'll never find a good man with your hair like that", "just let me press it". I wasn't offended, because I wasn't surprised. And she wasn't mean about it either, she just didn't understand it. I just said "if a guy doesn't like my hair then I can't be bothered". My Mom however, was too through. "Ma, you have that white mentality. It's 2009, not the 1960s"... She was going OFF, LOL. I just sat there grinning and taking pics of my hair on my phone to send to my girlfriends... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

When I went natural I just washed my hair and it curled up. My hair was always been at my mid back my family just always warned me not to cut my hair. "Its your beauty" ugh I was so tired of that. But yea they were ok with it because I had perms b4 but I never had to do a big cut or anything. So I guess I just get my ends cut and go. But ill just do it like that. Graduatly get my ends trimmed and stuff. But yea my family likes it. They say long as I don't cut it off. But I have the ppl n my family that's like "its cute but my hair can't do that. You have good hair" I was confused I thought having hair was a good thing. My friend like it I like it. Hmm don't think my bf likes it cuz well idk but he doesn't like anything. Only thing that matters is if I like it

My bf is my biggest supporter and has loved it natural from the very beginning. He even claims it was his idea for me to go natural. After listening to me talk about my hair far too much, he knows far more about hair than any man should. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

My friends were mixed. When I first BCed, one told me I was rocking the sexy Iyanla Vanzant look. Another friend looked at my bf and I and stated "Your kids are going to have the nappiest hair" and burst out laughing. Other friends just said nothing at all. Now that it's longer, almost all of my friends/acquaintances love my hair. I think that's partially because it's longer and partially because it now appears to be more kinky/curly, as opposed to just kinky, and therefore more socially acceptable.

My family were mostly negative when I first BCed, though a few people liked it. My mom said that it looked dry and when I started wearing wash and go's she said that they looked messy. So I was shocked when she told me that my hair looks nice in a simple puff! The rest of my family mostly likes my hair now, though occaisionally ask if I'm going to straighten it. My brother and dad are a different story. They like hair long and straight. They'll joke that my hair is hard and tough, even though it's very soft. I went natural for me, not anybody else, so it really doesn't matter what they think!

I've recieved mostly positive comments from my co-workers in my dept who are mostly Hispanic, White and Asian (My Chinese coworker loves to feel my afro puff which can get aggravating [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] ), But some of my A.A. close friends are like "girl when you getting a relaxer" a kindly say never... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I was transitioning and had hoped to do several mini chops but beause my hair got tangled after taking down some braids, I had no choice to do a big chop. Everyone was surprised, myself included, that I went from BSL to TWA but everyone has been supportive. Just some people shocked at the drastic change. My dad had the funniest reactions when he saw me. He said "Look at you with your jheri curl!"....I had to explain to him that the curls were my own. Gotta love that [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

My mom says i have "African hair"... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] ... I tried to convince her to not relax (she is in the 3b range) and she went and put a relaxer on from root to tip. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

My youngest sister likes my curls...I think if i can convince anyone it will be her!

My mom doesn't like it when I wear my hair lose, she prefers my hair put in a knot or bun!

My husband likes my natural hair and when I wear my hair straight he is complaining and is putting a bit of water on it! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] And he makes a nasty face when my hair is straight!

My little nice got beautiful curls, blond/gold color she is 3,5 years old and her mother doesn't like curls! The last time I saw her she asked for straight hair [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] ! I was really mad about that and told her that her natural hair is beautiful! I think her mother is alway complaining about her hair, because she just too lazy to detangle her gentle! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Hi all, I'm new to the forum but love the site. I've been natural all my life but started pressing my hair my junior year of high school and have been a pressed natural until embracing my natural texture last year. For the most part my parents and sister encourage all things natural so they have been more than supportive, but I recently had a conversation with my cousin that caused me to use some restraint. I had a head full of two-strand twists (my first set, so I was a bit self-conscious), I openly expressed that I wasn't feeling the style and that it had to grow on me, she replied that I didn't have the "type" of hair for that style, (mind you she has had a relaxer pretty much all her life and practices the same ritual on her daughter's hair) she went on to say that I didn't have "pretty hair" but long hair (in it's pressed state) and that I had somehow confused these two concepts. This is where I utilized my restraint as I looked at her full head of weave and held my tongue reminding myself that she was my cousin and I loved her dearly...I had to walk away from the conversation to look in the mirror and remind myself of how fabulous I am. Can't wait to see her this thanksgiving !!

My daughter and youngest son loved it. My middle son told me he preferred it straight. It was the perfect time for a Bill Cosby explanation of why it is my body/hair to do with as I please and that the same applies to all women in his life. My mother freaked out when she heard and after she saw it (I was wearing it in a curly TWA at the time) she was convinced it wasn't my real hair. A few hours later she said, "would you be mad if I cut my hair and got a curl like you?" I had to really convince her that it was in fact my natural texture. My white/Asian/Latino cohorts and professors love it. Everyday someone tells me how jealous they are of my hair. Most people think it fits my personality as I'm known as the resident radical pro-Black feminist

OK so I am still on the fence about doing my BC now or wait until next year. I told a friend of mine that is natural, but is faithful to straight long hair, that I was going to do the BC now instead of later. She told me to my face "YOU ARE CRAZY!!!!" I was so taken back by that. I never should have told anyone.

I got tons of support when I went natural, I had lost almost all of my length after a bad relaxer damaged my hair. I was left w/ a TWA and decided to go natural. I love my natural texture... it is so much easier to care for! 10 years later i'm still learning about my hair, trying new products and styles

Intelligentbeauty wrote:OK so I am still on the fence about doing my BC now or wait until next year. I told a friend of mine that is natural, but is faithful to straight long hair, that I was going to do the BC now instead of later. She told me to my face "YOU ARE CRAZY!!!!" I was so taken back by that. I never should have told anyone.

has your friend ever BC'd? was she a natural all of her life? going natural in this society is, in essence, not conforming to status quo and doing the YOU that God intended you to be. so, yes, you will get a plethora of remarks. at the end of the day, you have to be happy with the decision that YOU made for YOURSELF. also, remember that BC is not forever; its a means to the end. the end is healthy hair, which will then be long.

She has been natural all her life. I feel everything your saying. I can tell I am still transitioning in my mind. I thought I had arrived past remarks, except my husband's (who by the way is now on board and wants me to BC now [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] ). But I guess I still have issue to contend with. Anyway, my plan was to just do it when I am ready maybe now, maybe 4 months from now (that's my cut off, it will be 1 year then). But not to tell anybody except my hubby. Because of those kind of remarks.

Ok, so I went to Chicago this weekend to visit family. My grandmother just stared at me. I asked what she thought, and she said she wasn't sure and it had to grow on her. My brother and uncle made jokes all weekend, but it was out of love. My mother can't decide if she wants to tease or get more information. One aunt and a cousin's boyfriend loves it!! I thought the reactions were funny, especially my grandmother's half frown/half smile.

My mom and my sis are both natural and I actually have also always been natural apart from one exception.
The people here in Germany are very excited about my hiar, because they've never seen it before and they're always like is this really your hair? can I touch it?how often do you wash it etc...
There's no one that teases be cause of my hair but a lot of other black female friends can't understand why I don't relax my hair and I get pretty much the same looks all the time