Re: Black women and hair in the Caribbean/West Indies, Central a

by BajanPrincess82 23rd June 2010, 12:59 am

Its crazy that people's parents and families will put them down for wearing their natural hair. I mean, where do they think YOU got it from?? lol

by HAMPTONSFNST 23rd June 2010, 3:58 pm

It's so amazing to read everyone's stories from the many different islands of the West Indies. My family is from the States so naturally I have mixed blood of African and Native American ancestry. I've always admired natural hair and my mom is my best example of how beautiful it can be. She wears her hair very low and because of our NA blood her "waves be on swim" without the doorag! Growing up near a reservation all I saw were natural waves and curls and envied their hair from afar but now I embrace my natural pattern with it's many different textures.

My boyfriend is Bajan and he loves my natural hair. His mom recently texturized but I'm hoping she will eventually transition to natural bc she can achieve that same look without the chemicals.

by Juices-n-Berries 23rd June 2010, 4:36 pm

I'm Liberian and I recently went to a family event and that side of my family saw my hair for the first time. The first thing my Aunt said was "Oh, look at Kunta Kente". Now mind you my aunt is full blown born and raised in Africa, but still refers to natural hair as "Kunta Kente hair". I've heard Americans joke and say "you look like a nappy headed african" in regards to natural hair. But I was SHOCKED to hear such a comment from her. And GET THIS! MY AUNT IS NATURAL!!! However, she wears a low cut TWA. For some reason, I think a very low cut natural haircut is more acceptable among people than actually having natural hair with length. Her following comments weren't negative. She actually said she liked it. But the kunta reference just goes to show that even in Africa, we have all been bamboozled.

by VonAngel 23rd June 2010, 5:17 pm

My ex is from Bermuda, so I've spent some time there, and THIS is exactly what I noticed!! Most of the women I saw there (keep in mind that I didn't see everyone) rocked their natural hair, which was mostly 3a/b hair (probably due to the reason Moni explains below; my ex's dad is actually biracial). His mom has been rocking a TWA [by choice] for years. We were together back in college, during a time when I wore weaves...A LOT...and he always frowned on it. Naturalness is what he knew, and it was actually one of the many issues in our relationship. That was some years ago, but I see that much hasn't changed. He now finally gets to see my natural hair and is like Shocked

He expected my natural hair to look like what he's used to seeing in Bermuda. I always said that he needed to get out more.lol

Moni wrote:I'm from Bermuda (in the US for school) and natural hair is not uncommon here, though there are definitely more perms than naturals. Many women wear twas (including one woman who has had her twa dyed in a black and blonde checkerboard pattern for years!), as well as longer curly styles. "Pretty" hair (curly hair) is more common, thanks to a higher degree of past racial intermingling. It's a lot more rare to see a woman with natural 4b/c hair ("picky" hair), both because there's an underlying stigma against it and because its just less common naturally here.

My mom wasn't thrilled when I went natural, but now she loves my hair. As someone whose hair is neither "pretty" nor "picky", I got a lot of comments like what are you going to do with your hair from my family. My brother also jokes that my hair is hard or that it's going to cut him, even though it's soft and he has the exact same hair that I do. Now that it's grown I mostly get good reactions or none at all. There's still a subtle good hair/bad hair mentality hair, although it isn't phrased in those terms.

Differences between Bermuda and the US:
-Much more women wearing twas as a style choice. Amongst the natural community in the US, it seems like most women view twas as means to an end: longer natural hair. In Bermuda, women wearing twas for years is fairly common.

-Almost all little girls are natural. It's rare to see a mother perm her daughter's hair before she hits double digits or even her teens. Consequently, most women know how to care for natural hair (although not my mom) and extensions for little girls are pretty uncommon.

-Little girls aren't "required" to have their hair pressed for special occaisions. There are a variety of "acceptable" natural styles that girls wear for special events (cornrows with twists, straw sets, etc), not just the ole press and curl. For example, my niece was a flower girls in a wedding and wore her hair in cornrows in the front with twists in the back.

-Almost no stigma of natural hair being unprofessional, even in the most conservative settings. I'm a law student and have worked in legal jobs in Bermuda and the US. In Bermuda I felt free to wear any style from twists to comb coils and my boss would compliment me. In the US I mostly wore buns and puffs, keeping my hair as conservative as possible. I realize that many people wear unconservative styles to work in the US, but in Bermuda I didn't even have to think about it.

-No centralized natural community. Naturals in Bermuda don't really bond together. There's no forums, online groups, meetups, etc, at least as far as I know. I'm always thrilled when I see a fellow Bermudian on any forum or blog that I frequent.

Sorry for writing a book!

by SeanymphPrincess 24th June 2010, 1:43 am

Both my Parents are form Barbados, My mother hates nappy hair. She despises it. My father on the other hand loved our natural hair, but had no problems telling who he felt had "good hair" or wavy hair like his mother. Me and my other two siblings have different hair textures, My mom felt that my hair texture was the best. So I basically was known and still am known as the girl with the long pretty wavy hair, until recently. This past Monday I cut my hair from 36 inches to 3 inches which set my mom on fire, She looked like she was going to keel over. It was no holds bar for her. Growing up with two bajan parents hearing them talk about who has n*gga napps, and who has that "good coolie hair" really takes a toll.

by chocolate-kinks 24th June 2010, 2:27 pm

I'm Antiguan (not born, but my parents) and I notice that the majority of Antiguans have a relaxer. I remember when I went home last year, my aunt told me she did not like natural hair. She told me it looks like 'pickinaga hair" which means childrens hair. Some of the children I saw had natural hair and it looked really coarse. As some one say, it looked like "steel wool". Their hair looked so dry and brittle. I wish they could have the resources to learn how to take care of natural hair. It just seemed like the majority of women who had a perm just relaxed it and slicked it back. No huge styling, just the slick back in a bun.

by NaturallyPrecious 24th June 2010, 6:42 pm

My parents are from the Trinidad. My mother frowned her face and had a quizzical look at the idea of me going natural. I even convinced my sister-in-law to go natural who has Native American blood. I say that to say this. When my sister-in-law did her BC my mother went on and on to another natural of how BEAUTIFUL my sister-in-laws hair was, but when the convo turned to my recent BC'd 4a/b hair, she just frowned and turned her head. I was like, wow really!!! Ain't this the same hair you have on your hair Miss Lady??? I'm telling you brainwashing to think negatively about our God given hair sure is something!

by CurlyPA 25th June 2010, 12:51 am

LOL....I too am Haitian and it's such a relief to know I am not alone. I have been natural for 6 yrs and my family still gives me grief. I recently did a BC to get rid of a lot of heat damaged hair. Oh man have I been hearing it. My Jamaican hubby loves it. But my mom reminds me every chance she gets how much she doesn't. She always says "what happened to my daughters" You see my sister who has never relaxed in her 29 yrs of her life now wears her air curly. It kills my mom.
She has go so far to make appointments at the hair dresser for me, given me money....LOL... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]....CRAZY LADY. I will just keep taking her money to support my PJism....LOL and when she asks what happen I just say it was hot and the press didn't last....LOL

by HAMPTONSFNST 25th June 2010, 10:26 am

This is so awful [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] to read that those closest to you, that you admire and respect are so ignorant about the various textures we as people of color have! It angers me to know that the women that raised us to be strong,proud women of color can be our hair's worst enemy. Harsher than a relaxer. I'm so happy my mom is supportive. I have a mom that just doesn't care what other people think;family or unrelated and it doesn't hurt that I have aunts that have been rocking TWAs for years.

by bambiix2 25th June 2010, 9:17 pm

I'm from Barbados, lived here all of my life. It's full of weaves, braids, relaxed hair and locs. To find someone rocking a big ol puff is very rare .

This year I have noticed that alot of women are growing locs. And many have long flowing locs with beautiful unique designs and colours

Others have the pretty coloured weave and so forth, but those women usually come from "Certain" communities.

Natural hair is not frowned upon at all. Well , let me rephrase, I have not heard of anyone in my 20+ years of life ... getting on negative towards natural hair. There is a good hair- bad hair issue , which annoys me , but it is triggered alot from the Trinidadian hairtypes.

Mothers usually relax their children's hair because it is unmanageable or for when they get into "secondary school". At this point most children do their hair themselves and tend to prefer and rely on the relaxed look for ease. Then I suppose it all goes downhill from there. I must add though that MANY girls in secondary school from about 11 - 15 still have natural hair ... It's the older teens that get addicted to the relaxers.

by goombagirl 28th June 2010, 11:52 am

NaturallyPrecious wrote:My parents are from the Trinidad. My mother frowned her face and had a quizzical look at the idea of me going natural. I even convinced my sister-in-law to go natural who has Native American blood. I say that to say this. When my sister-in-law did her BC my mother went on and on to another natural of how BEAUTIFUL my sister-in-laws hair was, but when the convo turned to my recent BC'd 4a/b hair, she just frowned and turned her head. I was like, wow really!!! Ain't this the same hair you have on your hair Miss Lady??? I'm telling you brainwashing to think negatively about our God given hair sure is something!

My husband is a Trini and NONE of his family wears their hair natural. Well, I take that back. Those who have more Indian in them wear their hair natural. Me, however, being a 3/4 combo, garner those looks and well meaning comments because apparently I should'nt wear my hair in it's natural state. The...um...racism and classism is shocking to me-especially since Trinidad is one of the most multicultural places I've ever been to. But that is another post entirely.

by dajewel 28th June 2010, 11:58 am

goombagirl wrote:
NaturallyPrecious wrote:My parents are from the Trinidad. My mother frowned her face and had a quizzical look at the idea of me going natural. I even convinced my sister-in-law to go natural who has Native American blood. I say that to say this. When my sister-in-law did her BC my mother went on and on to another natural of how BEAUTIFUL my sister-in-laws hair was, but when the convo turned to my recent BC'd 4a/b hair, she just frowned and turned her head. I was like, wow really!!! Ain't this the same hair you have on your hair Miss Lady??? I'm telling you brainwashing to think negatively about our God given hair sure is something!

My husband is a Trini and NONE of his family wears their hair natural. Well, I take that back. Those who have more Indian in them wear their hair natural. Me, however, being a 3/4 combo, garner those looks and well meaning comments because apparently I should'nt wear my hair in it's natural state. The...um...racism and classism is shocking to me-especially since Trinidad is one of the most multicultural places I've ever been to. But that is another post entirely.

interesting because i get the most compliments from my hair from indo-trinis no matter if i wear it in twists or out.

by goombagirl 28th June 2010, 12:20 pm

dajewel wrote:
goombagirl wrote:
NaturallyPrecious wrote:My parents are from the Trinidad. My mother frowned her face and had a quizzical look at the idea of me going natural. I even convinced my sister-in-law to go natural who has Native American blood. I say that to say this. When my sister-in-law did her BC my mother went on and on to another natural of how BEAUTIFUL my sister-in-laws hair was, but when the convo turned to my recent BC'd 4a/b hair, she just frowned and turned her head. I was like, wow really!!! Ain't this the same hair you have on your hair Miss Lady??? I'm telling you brainwashing to think negatively about our God given hair sure is something!

My husband is a Trini and NONE of his family wears their hair natural. Well, I take that back. Those who have more Indian in them wear their hair natural. Me, however, being a 3/4 combo, garner those looks and well meaning comments because apparently I should'nt wear my hair in it's natural state. The...um...racism and classism is shocking to me-especially since Trinidad is one of the most multicultural places I've ever been to. But that is another post entirely.

interesting because i get the most compliments from my hair from indo-trinis no matter if i wear it in twists or out.

Would they be on the younger/Americanized end of the age spectrum?

by LadyMika 28th June 2010, 12:32 pm

HAMPTONSFNST wrote:This is so awful [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] to read that those closest to you, that you admire and respect are so ignorant about the various textures we as people of color have! It angers me to know that the women that raised us to be strong,proud women of color can be our hair's worst enemy. Harsher than a relaxer. I'm so happy my mom is supportive. I have a mom that just doesn't care what other people think;family or unrelated and it doesn't hurt that I have aunts that have been rocking TWAs for years.

It's usually the ones closest to you who do you the most harm. This isn't to say that my mother and her relatives are horrible people (they're not), but the relaxer is what they know best. So they push that on you and when you resist, it becomes an issue. My mother and I didn't talk for a few months, but when she saw me with my natural hair, she was "okay" about it. Now she's come around and she loves it--she's the only one so far. The rest, I don't know and I don't care about. To me, they're just people I share a bloodline with. I don't consider them "family", so their opinions/thoughts/concerns are worth less than a penny. IF that.

Didn't mean to go off. But I saw one of the wenches on Saturday. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] faces both ways--she kept staring. *I* kept it moving. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

by krissyc39 29th June 2010, 1:38 am

I was born and partially raised in Jamaica and ever since I've emigrated, visiting in the summers have really made me notice the various social stigmas that are placed on my people with their hair, complexion etc.

I have family in Kingston and the country and I find that the natural scene is different in each place. In Kingston, you see a lot of people (mostly young adults & teenagers) with crazy weaves and wigs in basically every color of the rainbow. A good majority have relaxed hair and others have thier natural hair in twists, puffs, TWAs, or cornrows. There are also white, spanish and indian influences in our culture and its not uncommon (at least not to me who has family in uptown Kingston) to see people who are mixed or racially ambigious. It seems that the only people who wear their hair out in wash-n-go type styles are the "coolies" and people with looser textured hair. I feel like only certain types of natural hair is accepted because most people are quick to tell "nappyheaded" that they need a relaxer while they praise those with loose, flowing curls.

In the country there are a LOT of people with natural hair either in cornrows or braids and, agreeing with what someone above already said, this is a religously influenced decision. There is an increasing number of people (again mostly teenagers/young adults) who have perms and weaves however. There aren't a lot of "coolies" there and the lighter members of my family (myself included) are addressed by strangers as either Ms. Chin (racist much?!) or browning or coolie and get waay more attention than the darker "average looking" folks. I personally hate the attention I get from anyone who addresses me in that way as it exudes pure ignorance.

I'm sorry for writing this much but I'm really connected to this issue and I think we as a people have a long way to go before we reach a level of acceptance of our natural selves...

by dajewel 29th June 2010, 11:08 am

goombagirl wrote:
dajewel wrote:
goombagirl wrote:
NaturallyPrecious wrote:My parents are from the Trinidad. My mother frowned her face and had a quizzical look at the idea of me going natural. I even convinced my sister-in-law to go natural who has Native American blood. I say that to say this. When my sister-in-law did her BC my mother went on and on to another natural of how BEAUTIFUL my sister-in-laws hair was, but when the convo turned to my recent BC'd 4a/b hair, she just frowned and turned her head. I was like, wow really!!! Ain't this the same hair you have on your hair Miss Lady??? I'm telling you brainwashing to think negatively about our God given hair sure is something!

My husband is a Trini and NONE of his family wears their hair natural. Well, I take that back. Those who have more Indian in them wear their hair natural. Me, however, being a 3/4 combo, garner those looks and well meaning comments because apparently I should'nt wear my hair in it's natural state. The...um...racism and classism is shocking to me-especially since Trinidad is one of the most multicultural places I've ever been to. But that is another post entirely.

interesting because i get the most compliments from my hair from indo-trinis no matter if i wear it in twists or out.

Would they be on the younger/Americanized end of the age spectrum?

no, it is all ages, young and old, expatriats and people who still live on the island. i was on a plane to trinidad earlier this year and had my hair in twists. everyone was looking. i even got an amazing compliment from an indo-trini lady in her 60s. you can tell she is very conservative. even when i checked my luggage in, all the indo-trinis were just staring at my hair. it wasn't looks of disgust, but i honestly think they have never seen something like that before and they were just looking in admiration. i was dating an indo-trini who was older, and he said he loved my hair and never understood why black women relaxed our hair.

by NaturallyPrecious 29th June 2010, 4:28 pm

dajewel wrote:
goombagirl wrote:
dajewel wrote:
goombagirl wrote:
NaturallyPrecious wrote:My parents are from the Trinidad. My mother frowned her face and had a quizzical look at the idea of me going natural. I even convinced my sister-in-law to go natural who has Native American blood. I say that to say this. When my sister-in-law did her BC my mother went on and on to another natural of how BEAUTIFUL my sister-in-laws hair was, but when the convo turned to my recent BC'd 4a/b hair, she just frowned and turned her head. I was like, wow really!!! Ain't this the same hair you have on your hair Miss Lady??? I'm telling you brainwashing to think negatively about our God given hair sure is something!

My husband is a Trini and NONE of his family wears their hair natural. Well, I take that back. Those who have more Indian in them wear their hair natural. Me, however, being a 3/4 combo, garner those looks and well meaning comments because apparently I should'nt wear my hair in it's natural state. The...um...racism and classism is shocking to me-especially since Trinidad is one of the most multicultural places I've ever been to. But that is another post entirely.

interesting because i get the most compliments from my hair from indo-trinis no matter if i wear it in twists or out.

Would they be on the younger/Americanized end of the age spectrum?

no, it is all ages, young and old, expatriats and people who still live on the island. i was on a plane to trinidad earlier this year and had my hair in twists. everyone was looking. i even got an amazing compliment from an indo-trini lady in her 60s. you can tell she is very conservative. even when i checked my luggage in, all the indo-trinis were just staring at my hair. it wasn't looks of disgust, but i honestly think they have never seen something like that before and they were just looking in admiration. i was dating an indo-trini who was older, and he said he loved my hair and never understood why black women relaxed our hair.

Well just to clear things up on the personal note. I have many Trini relatives that have locs, some Aunts that have been natural for years. So please don't assume it's a Trini thing. It is simply that my mother thinks tightly coiled hair or even TWA's is I guess unkempt or not a good look on everyone maybe even me. When I'd shown her beautiful natural styles she was amazed at how lovely they were. Heck she said two-strand twist was nothing new in her book. "We've been doing those since way back" she says, lol. I think it's just a matter of re-introducing our natural selves to everyone including us that is the shocker.

by HAMPTONSFNST 30th June 2010, 1:09 pm

It's too much of a coincidence that certain cultures are more critical of natural hair than it to be a personal preference. All the ladies here that are representing various Caribbean islands have said the same or similar comments. These native islands are just as ignorant as the States when it comes to the perception of Black beauty.

It's our obligation as individual human beings to embrace our natural beauty and not conform to European, colonial ideology.

by krys419 5th July 2010, 12:05 am

I'm Jamaican with some Cuban, and Panamanian for the most part

On my mom's side, my grandfather was Cuban and Panamanian. He had thick hair that was slightly textured (He died 2 weeks ago. rest in peace).Her mother was Jamaican but she was mixed with Indian. Her hair was curls and soft..Not textured like most african Americans. My cousins from these grandparents (from my aunt)have coolie hair. My female 25 yr old cousin does not need a relaxer. She has curly hair that only needs a blowdryer then a brush to slick back and become straight. my mom's hair is thin and soft like her mom but more textured. She gets a relaxer so I'm not sure if she has curls, but I think she does because my little sister does.

My father's side is Jamaican but his father is mixed with Scottish and his mother is mixed with Irish and native american. He has thick hair on this side. Not veeeery nappy, but very thick.

So my oldest sister ended up with medium thickness hair that is textured. Not many curls. My younger sister ended up with very soft thin hair that is a bit textured and some curls. I ended up with VERY thick hair that is textured. not many curls. None of us have the typical nappy hair but we defnitely do not have coolie hair. It would take much more than a brush to get my hair straight. I need a blowdryer, a flat iron, hair product and a comb to my root to make it straight. My hair is very hard to stay flat. It is just too thick with tons of body. I have accepted that my hair is not meant to stay straight.

All in all Ive noticed people in Jamaica have no problem with natural hair really. A lot of them prefer straight hair and white skin, but I have seen my fair share of jamaican women with natural hair. Mostly twisted up. I dont see the men like this though

by natural813 5th July 2010, 2:33 am

I was born on the island of dominica (not dominican republic). Alot of people have relaxed hair, But there are some girls that keep there natural hair no matter what, it is how they are raised and what they are taught about natural hair. The mentality of hair there is good hair/bad hair, my mom think straight hair is better so since she was 18 she relaxed and she still wont stop no matter what. I'm glad I learned to love my hair for what it is Smile

You would think caribbean people would love there natural hair more but they follow the lifestyles of the people they see on t.v., They might have there natural hair for a while but eventually they give in and get a relaxer.

by lena73 5th July 2010, 8:37 am

splitsun wrote:
D-Lish wrote:Splitsun, do you live in Brooklyn? I dont know of any carribbean spots like that in manhattan or queens. I can only think of Brooklyn who has that much carribbean family. I actually live near Eastern Parkway in Brooklyn and the bunch of caribbeans there do not wear natural hair, but weaves and extensions. I not carribbean myself, I'm native american. But I really didn't expect to see people born and raised in the islands to wear fake hair.

Hey D, you got that right. I live in Brooklyn with my closest trainstop being Crown Heights-Utica Av (Eastern Parkway) ^_^ (hey neighbour!)

there is a large caribbean section in the northern bronx also...being from the bronx (not of caribbean background) some of my best friends are west indian. actually my son's godmom is trini

nyc is such a melting pot (((HUGS))) to NYC

by dajewel 6th July 2010, 1:22 am

the one thing i have noticed about Caribbean men is that they love natural hair! and it's not the 'rasta' dem, but men in all socioeconomic circles. you must understand that Caribbean men love our culture, and part of validating the love of our culture is validating by showcasing our God given hair when properly taken cared of. i remember one guy in Dominica, Trinidad and in Dominican Republic said that they gravitate towards natural hair because all they see is permed/weaved hair, and natural hair is a 'fresh of breath hair and validates the awesomeness of our culture.'

by goombagirl 6th July 2010, 1:37 pm

Welp. It's confirmed. We're going to the family reunion in August. I'm just thinking of putting my hair in an old school Erykah Badu wrap and being done with it. I've got enough issues to deal with when it comes to his family.....

by kinksncurls 7th July 2010, 7:01 pm

I'm from Trinidad also. I was born there and moved to the U.S. in 98. It's interesting, because my mother was completely against relaxing my hair and I was 4a/b hair. She used to take her time braiding my hair and taking care of it so I wouldn't relax it. She passed when I was 12 and I moved to the U.S. and my family here promptly relaxed it.
But the majority of my family have thick 4 a/b hair and they are all natural. I have noticed though from my secondary school photos that quite a bit of the girls in the photos had their hair relaxed. And some of my friends there still do, but some are also natural. But I didn't have a hair complex growing up, but maybe it was just my family.

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