Kids developing complexes about natural hair.

Hey ladies! So my 11 year old cousin has beautiful, long natural hair. Unfortunately her mom doesn't know how to care for her hair, nor does she have the patience to learn. So my cousin was left to fend for herself. She is currently wearing her hair straight and I asked her when was the last time her hair was washed, and she replied "IDK, in months." She also said that she doesn't like her natural hair and she wants to keep it straight or get a relaxer. I quickly figured out why, because she NEVER had her natural hair properly taken care of, therefore she views her hair as something bad and unmanageable. She thinks the only option she has is straight hair. It makes me so upset to see someone with such beautiful hair not appreciate and love it. The same thing happened with her older sister, and now her older sister's hair has fallen out and she has to wear weaves. SMH!! So of course I told her I would help her take care of her hair, and teach her how to take care of it herself. This cycle has to stop! We need to teach our fellow black women that there's nothing wrong with their hair, and that their hair can be manageable. So many black females walk around with jacked up weaves and damaged relaxed hair because they think there's no hope for their natural hair!

UPDATE: So my cousin came over and I washed and deep conditioned her hair. Even though she's natural her hair smelled like it was relaxed, and she had so much breakage and shedding. I tried everything I could to convince her that natural hair is beautiful. I showed her all of my natural inspiration photos, taught her how to properly detangle her hair, etc. But all she kept saying is my hair is NAPPY, I don't like Nappy hair, and that she wants her hair to lay down, not poof up. She was practically begging me to flat iron her hair, and her mom even called me and asked me to flat iron it because " you can't comb out her natural hair." UGHH I was so frustrated but I just gave up and flat ironed her hair, I guess she's just going to have to learn the hard way.

When I was younger, everyone would tell my mom that my hair was so nappy, she better put a relaxer in my hair. So when I was five, she put a relaxer in my hair so it would be more "manageable." Her hair was always pressed so she doesn't know what it's like to take care of hair properly in it's natural state. Growing up if you're black and don't have a relaxer, people look at you like you're crazy.

I agree, but now we have natural hair sites to help our sisters/cousins/aunties take care of their natural hair daughters.
Its just a matter of time before we spread our knowledge.

I had this same issue with my younger sister last yr. She has such beautiful hair, it's long and really curly but no one in her house knws what to do with it. She started begging me to straighten it and I realized it was a bad idea because she wanted it because she thought she NEEDED it. So thats what actually made me start paying attention to my hair and learning about it. Now both my sisters are learning to love their hair...

my lil sister who was excited to go natural cuz i did (im her hair idol) so of course i didnt expect her to BC cuz she's only 14 and i also KNEW she wouldnt be able to handle the "terrible 2's". she loved the MJ buttercreme and held out for a good 4 months, however, today i found out she couldnt take the heat so she got out the kitchen! she's like "i cant cut my hair off like you cuz im only 14". i said noooo you cant cut your hair off cuz you care what other people think about you. you know your hair doesnt grow past your ear and you constantly have split ends and breakage but as you get older you'll learn and realize whats best for your hair.

I have no problem with perms, my hair grew gorgeously long with one but thats becuz i took care of it. perm or natural can only work when you maintain it well and take pride in it. her generation equates long hair with beauty cuz they watch too much of the dmn BET videos.

NubieNattyTwn-kisha wrote:my lil sister who was excited to go natural cuz i did (im her hair idol) so of course i didnt expect her to BC cuz she's only 14 and i also KNEW she wouldnt be able to handle the "terrible 2's". she loved the MJ buttercreme and held out for a good 4 months, however, today i found out she couldnt take the heat so she got out the kitchen! she's like "i cant cut my hair off like you cuz im only 14". i said noooo you cant cut your hair off cuz you care what other people think about you. you know your hair doesnt grow past your ear and you constantly have split ends and breakage but as you get older you'll learn and realize whats best for your hair.

I have no problem with perms, my hair grew gorgeously long with one but thats becuz i took care of it. perm or natural can only work when you maintain it well and take pride in it. her generation equates long hair with beauty cuz they watch too much of the dmn BET videos.

UGH Tell me about it! You had to hear the things she told me, I was completely flabbergasted. I told her that if she kept using heat her hair would break off and she replied "oh well, I'll just have to wear a weave." and she also told me that the lady at the hair salon told her she couldn't get a rollerset because her hair "doesn't take rollers." WTF??

My five year old wants to have "yellow straight" hair. She has been saying this for at least a year now (I have been natural for eight years, all her life). Anyway her BFF is Caucasian has very curly brown hair and she had now decided that that is the type of hair she wants. I explained to her the other day that her hair is long but it grows out while her bff hair grows down and I thought she had me on ignore (as she seems to do when I am talking about her hair) but last night when I was combing her hair she was explaining to my husband that her hair grows out and not down. I was so overjoyed but I pretended that I wasn't listening to their conversation. I also talked to the bff's mom and she told me that her daughter is now requesting hair that grows out because she wants to wear puffs. LOL Kids gotta love them!