Nu-Jay2011

Hi my name is Jay and Im so excited to be apart of this forum and read everyone's comments and stories. I was originally planning on being a long time transitioner (1yr). So on my blog about a month ago on November 16th, I wrote a post about it. I want to insert that first because I basically already wrote my whole story up until this point. Read the next post about my big chop.

The beginning of a transition: Going from relaxed to natural

As you can see from the title, I want to talk about transitioning from a relaxer to natural. I am currently attempting such a feat and let me tell you, it is HARD. I can’t even remember the first time I got my hair relaxed, that’s how long I been relaxing it (I’m only 21). I went from thick and sometimes unmanageable tresses to very sleek and straight hair…ask my mom (hi mom!). So for the past 8 or so years I have been a faithful ‘permer’. I was the girl that said ‘Oh, I need a perm (relaxer) to manage my hair or else I cannot deal with it.’ Yep that was me. One thing that the relaxer box don’t tell you is how to keep your hair up and take care of it right. My hair went from long to short pretty darn quick and every since I became aware of this frightening fact (8th grade), I have been trying to grow my hair out back to pre-relaxer length every since to no avail. I tried so many things, braids, twists, ponytails etc, etc but bottom line is, I did not know how to properly take care of my hair. At the end of my freshman year in college, I got frustrated so I did what any smart person would do: I bought a book. I grabbed Ultra Black Hair Growth 11 by Cathy Howse from Amazon and I read it multiple times. There was a lot of common sense stuff in it. The main things that I took out of it were to moisturize, wash my hair more than once every freaking 2 weeks, and reduce heat. Plain and simple. I saw results immediately. She did push her products a lot and I admit, I almost gave in but I was an unemployed college student, so I had to make due with what I could afford (what mom bought lol). I would wash my hair like every 3 to 4 days, put some moisturizer in it, let it air dry (yes, each time) and flat iron it and wouldn’t touch it until the next wash. I would not put heat to my head unless it was after I washed it in order to maintain moisture and not dry out my hair. I felt a difference in the way my hair felt (it felt healthy) but 3 years later my hair has not gotten too much longer. I have had my moments where I had some length but I soon as someone went near my head with scissors, sadly I had to start over again.

So here I am, cutting out the creamy crack because the fact of the matter is, I have (had) bad split ends and breakage so I would gain a few inches, only to have it shred/break off again. This summer my hair was the longest it has been in like forever. I love it and I was flaunting it. But of course, it began the upward spiral. About a month into my senior year (so about mid September), I was due for a relaxer but I didn’t feel like spending the money. My two friends, Gabby and Alisha, suggested (threatened) I go natural. Gabby went natural about 1 ½ ago and Alisha has been natural her whole life. Both have some very luxurious hair, so like a follower, I agreed. It’s been about two months since this conversation and I have been very tempted to buy a relaxer many many many times. I’m not used to my roots curling up every time I sweat or my curls not holding when I flat-iron it. My hair was so uneven that I told my other friend Lanisha to work her magic, make me even, do as she please because I was seriously thinking about going for the BC (big chop) and rocking a banging afro. I came to my senses. Now I am in a very irritating in between stage where I only throw my hair in a pony (which I freaking despise) but with a semi-cute hump in the front.

Hopefully I will have enough new growth by May so I can just wet my hair and let it curl up for the summer months (less maintenance). I have approximately 2 inches of new growth since July so that is very good for a 4 month span (you typically growth a half inch every month with proper care). I bought a new conditioning shampoo that don’t have any of the harsh and bad chemicals in it (Google bad hair ingredients) and a deep conditioner so I can DC at least once a week. I am going to decrease the comb (only wide tooth to detangle) and brush (especially the brush since I just picked it back up last week) usage and see where I go from there. My flat-iron doesn’t really work on my hair anymore because the new growth is extremely picky and the relaxed parts are too short to style it the way I want so I am just gonna use it once I find a good way to style my hair that I like. So here I go, wish me luck. I am already on week 16!!!
Last Relaxer: July 24 (I always keep track)Last Color: October 19 Last trim: November 5

(http://oneandonlyjay.tumblr.com/post/1593413226/the-beginning-of-a-transition-going-from-relaxed-to)


I was little but look at all that hair
This was the length that I hovered around
The longest I have been since relaxers (This summer)
My ‘id care’ face and my hump (Now), well then

On Wednesday December 8th, I did something big! I cut off all of my hair! OMG, right? I had just got to the point where I was dreaming about it in my sleep so when I washed my hair this night, I grabbed the scissors and the rest was history. But it wasn't easy. It took me a good 20 minutes to finally get the courage to put the scissors to my head. That first cut was the hardest! After I cut a small section, I freaked out and called my friend Gabby. She screamed and yelled for me to come down to her apartment, so I did. She helped me cut the rest off and was good moral support. It felt so weird not to have hair at first. I would shake my head, to get my hair out my face, only there wasn’t any hair. I would try to wring my hair out when washing, only there wasn’t any hair. IT HAS BEEN A PROCESS!
But I love my new hair. I love being able to wash and go, of course after putting some moisturizer in my hair. I love not putting on a shower cap when in the shower. I like taking a nap and not wake up with messed up hair. I don’t have to worry about wrapping my hair up at night, only to still have my hair mess up during the night. I love not having to completely worry about my hair during the day. Yea, I have to stop sometimes and moisture when my hair is feeling dry but thats it! I am having a smooth transition into this no hair thing. Everyone has been really supportive. Now I can achieve my goal of having natural hair without my relaxed hair there to remind me of the completely straight and easy times.
My hair is a decent twa (appx. 2inches) right now, but Im excited for it to grow so I can see my real curl pattern and do the little cute hair styles I seen the other all natural girls doing. If you are going natural and are thinking about the big chop, I say go for it. Its been very liberating. Yes, it takes time to adjust to having short hair but at this point, you will learn to love your face for your face not because of how your hair frames it and makes it look. Find a friend or two who knows you are going natural and are supporting you and talk to them. Asked them to continue supporting you, talk about the cons and pros of cutting your hair. As long as you have that support system, things will go easy. If you don’t have that support system, go online and view the sites dedicated to womens hair care, going natural and getting the big chop. That helped me a lot to mentally prepare myself. I realized that its just hair! It will grow back, most likely better as long as you take care of it! You are not your hair. Your hair is not you.

Sort of kinda regimen:

I co-wash every other day with V-05 Conditioner. Either MOISTURE MILKS PASSION FRUIT SMOOTHIE
MOISTURIZING CONDITIONER (.89 at Walmart) or CALMING CHAMOMILE NOURISHING CONDITIONER (also .89). I alternate each time.

After I co wash, I oil and seal the moisture in with a whip shea butter mix I made using unrefined shea butter, EVOO, and a few drops of oil I had lying around from the dollar store (I wanna say African Best but I don't think it was). The oil had different types of oil such as jojoba and coconut, within it and I pretty much used it to create a nice fragance because I hate, Hate, HATE the smell of EVOO.

Since I am an employed but still poor college student, I haven't been able to buy a quality deep conditioner or leave in one so I been using my conditioners I have lying around (not my V05 but Tressme and Motions) as deep conditioners.
In between washings and during the day, I use a spritz mix using water (YAY), vegetable glycerin, and aloe vera gel. The next time I make this mix, Im thinking about getting rid of the aloe vera gel. I hate the way that smells also.

Additional products and materials include a ECO styling gel, a soft brush for my edges, head bands and a big tooth comb that I keep in the shower.

My hair feels awesome and super soft. I have some curlies that you can see and the rest you can feel. I love it!

Sorry for picture quality. All were taken on cell phones.

Kudos to my friend Gabby and her awesome phone for this
After the cut, its dry and uneven
My curlies after a wash
Up close after a wash I love it!

Welcome to Curl Street!!! your twa is sooo cute on you

I enjoyed reading your story. I like the way you described how you felt right after your Big Chop. I was so hyped I couldn't sleep. (I was up for almost 36 hrs straight)

You are so blessed to have the support of your friends, and you are going to love this natural journey!!

Congratulations and welcome to CS!!!

Thank you so much ladies! I am still having a hard time keeping my hands out my hair lol. Everyone's stories on here is so inspiring

Great story! Welcome to curl street!

Welcome Welcome Welcome to the Street..Enjoy the journey

Congrats on your BC and good luck on your journey!

Its been 3 days past one month since my big chop. Im really excited because I can see the growth. My hair is about 3 inches all over now. Funny thing is, I have been having dreams that my hair will never grow back LOL. That just prompted me to continue to take care of my hair. I am still co-washing but its every other day now. I mixed up a shea butter, coconut oil, olive oil ad jojoba oil concoction. It was initially too oily but I mixed in more shea butter to balance it all out. I have been mainly wearing my hair in wash and gos with an occasional headband. For Christmas, I did brush the sides of my hair up and had a frohawk and for NYE I attempted the Pompadour with a beanie. I washed my hair tonight with shampoo (first time since BC day) and it felt soooo good! It was Cream of Nature Detangling Conditioning Shampoo (something like that) and my curls immediately curled up so nicey. I had a product build up I guess. I then put its accompanying conditioner in to deep condition. I usually deep condition overnight (once or twice a week) by putting on a shower cap and my silk scarf. My hair is so soft and curly in the morning. Everything is going well with my natural journey. I have been encouraging other ladies around me to go natural. As soon as they say 'I thought about it, but Im not sure', I give them a list of websites (with CN at the very top), tell them them check it out, and I tel them that they have an official support system in me! My only complaint is that I can't find a lot of different hair styles for my length whenever I wanna switch up from the wash and go look.