Help Me, Please?

Where to start! I've been natural most of my life, I had a relaxer 3 or 4 times in high school and post graduation after crying to my mom and grandmother, begging, pouting, stomping, rolling around on the floor pounding my fists, just wanting to be like everyone else so I wouldn't get made fun of anymore for being that girl with the long nappy hair. Hearing things like, oh she would be so pretty if her hair wasn't so nappy, on a daily basis takes a big toll on a person. I'm over 30 now, so I haven't had a relaxer in over 10 years

Hair is a big thing in my family, going way back, the ladies in my fam have had long natural hair. So you can just imagine the lectures and the "I told you so's" I had to endure when I lost alot of my hair having it relaxed. I made it a point to take better care of my hair and just get it back to a healthy state and figured that length would come naturally, but I had no idea about all the products out there for hair like ours. In my house, a bottle of Prell and a can of Blue Magic is the extent of our hair care regimen!

So now looking around the net and finding this site and seeing all the products that everyone uses, I'm at a loss. I had no idea that "grease" might be bad for my hair and actually blocking moisture! My grandmother has used it forever and has hair past her waist. So I need a little help from a big sis or a twinny trying to find something that might work for me.

I don't exactly have a regimin, I just shampoo and condition at least once a week, or whenever my hair looks or feels dirty. I was greasing my scalp after washing and just slicking some on my ends and edges throughout the week whenever my hair felt dry, but there was always a brittleness to my ends. I do get my ends trimmed regularly.

So since checking out a few other natural sites and all the advice given here, these are the things I have tried lately, unfortunately without much success:

Giovanni Smooth As Silk Shampoo and Conditioner
Herbal Essences Hello Hydration Shampoo and Conditioner
Herbal Essences Totally Twisted Shampoo and Conditioner
Organix Coconut Shampoo and Conditioner, Leave-In Serum, and the Coconut Milk
Kinky Curly Shampoo and Knot Today Leave In and the Curling Custard
Shea Moisture Shea Butter
EVOO
Waleda Rosemary Conditioning Hair Oil
Cantu Shea Butter Leave-In
Cantu Shea Butter Hair Pomade

(these are just the ones I've tried recently, within the last few months, and can remember off the top of my head, you don't even want to see my product drawers and baskets, we're a family that doesn't throw anything away [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] )

So I guess I need to find one product line, if possible, to stick with and try for a good while to see how well it works, instead of giving it up so quickly and I need a good moisturizer, that's the biggest thing that seems to be missing for me.

And to make matters even more complicated, I have about 3 or 4 different textures in my hair, I always have, even before the relaxers. The front of my hair is pretty straight and long, the back and crown are really dry and very kinky and a bit shorter than the front. The left side of my hair maintains curls better than the right side does.

I was pressing and flat ironing my hair every two weeks for at least 6 months or more in the last 2 years, but I have not used any heat on my hair for the last 6 or 7 months. I just let it air dry and usually twist or plait it before bed. I do tie my hair at night and sleep on a satin pillow case, which, I learned the pillow case thing from here!

When I get home tonight I will try to get some pics of my hair and post them. My avi pic is about a year old now, but the length and texture are about the same. I did get about 4 inches cut off a few months ago, but it's already growing back and is once again growing past my shoulders. The hair growth is mostly genetic though and may not be from anything I am doing, but then again, it might be, I'm so confused!

Maybe my regimin that is not a regimin works for my hair, but I still feel like something is missing and I would like to moisturize without the hair grease weighing my hair down and I would like to find a shampoo that doesn't leave my hair feeling so stripped.

Please don't feel shy if you have advice and havent been natural as long as I have, as you can see, I don't know much and any advice is appreciated!! Having natural hair was just normal to me and I never reached out for more support in taking care of it.

I do apologize for the long post, but me and my hair, we go through it on a daily basis and I have been lurking this site for quite awhile now, but haven't had the guts to really get out here and post, so I've had tons of questions building up!

I thank you all in advance for even reading all of this!