Need a Big Sis!!

So I have decided to go natural not only for myself, but for my daughter as well. I grew up with low self-esteem because I was SUPER self-conscious of how I looked and how people thought of me. I don't want her to be the same way. After talking with her about her hair and her appearance, I discovered that she wanted to me "like mommy and have pretty, straight hair and not not ugly, knotty hair." That did not make me feel good at all. My little girl has beautiful, soft, curly hair that I was envious of because she had absolutely no need of a relaxer. That's when I realized that I need to be an example for her to follow, so I needed to started loving myself and my own hair first.

This is a little scary for me because I am so used to doing what everyone else around was doing because it was convenient, but I am 30 now and WAAAY past time for me to stand on my own two feet and stopping worrying about what everyone else thinks!!! I am a single parent, raisin two kids by myself and I don't hesitate to let people know when they have overstepped the line when it comes to raising them, opinions are like bills-everybody has some; so I just need to transfer that same energy into doing the same for myself. My mother, of course does not agree with my decision at all. She doesn't think I will stick with it because she knows how much I hate walking around with my hair all over the place, and I know NOTHING about styling hair since I have been getting a relaxer since I was 4!!! Currently, I am wearing microbraids, but I don't want to stay with them because I end up losing all the hair at the hair line. I have been comtemplating doing a BC, but....I don't know. I've had short styles before, all through high school, but that was a relaxed short styled and I will admit, I am nervous and scared to death about the reaction I will get from people if I do it. Then I am worried about how I am going to style my hair...?!?!? I can't even cornrow hair!! My mother mostly does my daughter's hair when she gets it braided. And I have put the fear of God in here not to add any weave or a relaxer. LOL.

This is something that I really want to do, but my lack of support and ability to style myself have be afraid that I have bitten off more than I can chew....

Raniesaj

Hi Raniesaj!!!! My name is Pamela and I was recommend to be your Big Sis by NylaColis!! I am here to support you!!! I am a single mother of 2 great boys, Kendall 2 (Dec 28) and Deontae 14!! I truly understand how you feel and I am here to support you! I did the big chop in Sept 2007, when I was pregnant with Kendall and like you I've always worn short relaxed styles and for YEARS I wanted to go natural! So I did it!! You will be absolutely amazed by the reaction you get from people both the negative and the positive, but it will be mostly POSITIVE!! You will stand out from everyone else and your natural beauty will shine through! Please email me I have more information for you, but due to forum policy I cannot discuss it! I will just tell you to google koils by nature.

Hope to here from you soon!

Pamela
pamelasjenkins@gmail.com

Thanks, Pamela!! I'm really trying to embrace this not only for me, but for my daughter. Working in a corporate environment, coupled with the lack of support from my family, makes this even more difficult for me. I orginally goal was to wear the micros until mid-Feb, then BC if I have at least 2inches of new growth, but the time is going by so fast, I am starting to get cold feet...

I had thought about transitioning long term, but I am impatient and I'm starting to think that if I get used to doing my hair while it is short, I can learn as it grows...

I will email you so that you have my personal email address...

Raniesa
raniesaj@gmail.com

Glad that you ladies connected!

I thought this would be a good connection!

Raniesaj- I wish my big sister had her own natural product line! You are a lucky girl!

Thank you NylaCoils for suggesting this forum. I have been a regular visitor on CurlyNikki for quite some time and had a bunch of questions before I even seriously considered transitioning. Your idea for this forum was like a Godsend for me!!!

Thank you so much!!!

Be Blessed!! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

LOL!!! @NylaCoils!!! Raniesaj this transition will be a smooth process!!

@ raniesaj - I am so happy this idea has been a blessing!


The natural way gets lonely! I am so glad that you have your daughter and koilsbynature to travel on this journey! or as she is known on the forum as KbN!

Thank you both!! I am glad to FINALLY meet some women who are not ashamed of their curls!!! I can't wait 'til I 'grow up' and become a Big Sis to another transitioning curly!! LOL!! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Be Blessed!!!

Ok. I have seen a LOT of abbrev throughout the website and I still can't figure out what half of them mean... What in the world is EVOO? and ACV? and CG? Does anybody have a cheat sheet?? [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] This is worst that texting... LOL [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

raniesaj- here is the link...


Hope this helps

EVOO- in honor of rachel ray- extra virgin olive oil
ACV- apple cider vinegar
CG- Curly girl method- consist of not using shampoo to wash- use a conditioner. You can google that Curly Girl Method


http://www.curlynikki.forumotion.com/general-f3/natural-hair-dictionary-detangling-the-terms-t47.htm

OH!!! Thank you!!! Now I get it... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Ok. Now I can follow the conversation intelligently. LOL!! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

Ok. I get what cowashing is now and understand somewhat why it is not a good thing to shampoo every week, but I am reading a lot about different regimens that other ladies are doing to their hair. Should I be doing something to my hair every day? week? month? And what should I be doing. Right now I am sporting some microbraids that I am ITCHING to take out, but I have no idea what to do with my hair once I do. And I am so used to shampooing and conditioning my hair every Saturday, now I'm hearing that this is probably not a good idea, so what should I be doing to it and how often?

Also, what's the difference between unrefined shea butter and the stuff you can pick up at the beauty supply store? And what would I use EVOO for? I cook with it and I know its good for the skin, but what are the benefits for my hair? And how clean are we really get our hair if we aren't using shampoo? I mean, I know I am still reverting back to what I have always been taught, but I am used to my hair being 'squeaky clean' after a good shampoo, can I really achieve this with just a cowash? And is what you are really trying to say is that the 'squeaky clean' feeling that I refer to as a 'good shampooing' not actually good for my hair at all?

And how do achieve length? I have always wanted long hair-straight or curly-but my hair always seems to stop growing and start breaking off just above my shoulders. I could never get it to grow healthy past chin level. What's the secret?

And if you have any tips for my daughter, that would be awesome as well. How often should I wash-or cowash-her hair. What products would you recommend that would be a good mositerizer, but not too harsh for her scalp. And what about styling? Right now I put beads at the ends of her braids secured with rubber bands, but is that healthy. I will admit they are pretty tight because I'm afriad they'll fall off. And when I do her hair, I always put it in little ponytails all over (with rubber bands) and twist the hair (cause I can't braid), then put the beads at the end (she loves the beads).

Sorry so many questions, but this is really the best time for me to ask because of my schedule and the kids, so I have to cram in everything I have been thinking about during the day before I forget again. LOL!!

I did it!! I BC'd on Dec 30th!! It felt GREAT!!!! It feels GREAT!!! I don't know why I ever hesitated!!! I should have done this YEARS ago!!! LOL!!! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

BTW, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year's!!! How have you been?

I am so happy or you..Here are the instructions on how to post a pic


-Click on the image above that looks like a polaroid with a blue computer disk in front of it
-Browse your hard drive for the image, and click 'host it'
-Copy the 2nd (middle) code that says 'image', and paste it into the body of the text
-Click on the image above again to close the box

That's it

Thanks!!

I love my BC!!! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

...trying to post a pic, but its not working... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] I can't paste the url to the text... [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]