Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

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Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

Post by Karyn on 18th February 2011, 2:49 pm

Okay, so this morning when I was sitting in my school library, this guy said something that has been bothering me all day. He was talking with his friends (they're all my acquaintinces) and they were talking about what they were as far as race and their family etc etc etc (he's Turkish, there were two African American girls, and a white & black biracial girl). And the dude goes "No offense, but black girls would be so much prettier if they didn't have that hair texture. Like white people's hair. I love white people" and my face was like Shocked and I wasn't gonna say anything until ALL the girls agreed and were like "yeah, i totally agree. i wish i had like...asian hair. it's so nice" i went from shock to just disgusted and angry No Knowing the type of person I am though, I didn't even get loud and put them in their places. I was just like "wow, really? i'm actually very offended" and just continued with what I was doing. He was just like "sorry" Rolling Eyes I'm usually the person who says "relaxed vs natural: it's really not that deep", but maybe it really is that deep. I'm still (hours later) left feeling some kinda way and I've just been in a bad mood since that happened. Idk.

What do you think? I'm in high school btw and these people were sophomores and juniors.
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Re: Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

Post by BajanPrincess82 on 18th February 2011, 3:00 pm

I can see how that would hurt your feelings and offend you. That conversation would have bothered me too at that age. People can be so ignorant, but what can you do except live your life and do YOU!
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Re: Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

Post by TiffNotANY on 18th February 2011, 3:08 pm

I think people that make comments like that have little to no knowledge about our hair. I understand how it bothers you but keep moving and know that you're not trying to please anyone but yourself. I have a guy friend who looks at my hair with a disgust look, while everyone else loves looking and touching it.
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Re: Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

Post by Indigo.Blue on 18th February 2011, 4:31 pm

Awww Karyn...no, I don't think you are being too sensitive. It hurts whenever anyone says they don't like something and that something just happens to be who you are. As we learn as a collective how to take care of our hair, I am sure that perception will slowly change. Unfortunately, the bad examples tend to represent the whole even when their are plenty of examples proving otherwise.

Kudos to you for defining your own style instead of searching for a way to fit in. It is exponetially harder to deal with the negative perceptions as a teen but don't waver, stand firm. You are light years ahead of the crowd.

Also remember that everything is not for everyone. I have heard comments like that about other ethnicities such as: Asian men might be cute if they were taller; white men would be dateable if they had swagger; White men look nasty when they sweat; don't date Indian men, they are too much of momma's boys...

So Karyn, take it all in stride. Everyone will not like everything about you. I used to get offended if a guy said he did not like tall women because I am tall, but I later realized that he was not making a personal attack on me...it was just his preference, which he is entitled to. There are plenty of people from other ethnicities who loves the texture of our hair so...don't lend your energy to those who don't. Give your energy to those who do.
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Re: Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

Post by Karyn on 18th February 2011, 6:35 pm

thanks everyone. i've gotten over it kinda. i'm not sweatin it too much cause tomorrow i'll be on a plane to vegas!


i know everyone isn't gonna like me and i wasn't really upset with the fact that he said it in front of me cause i have natural hair (one of the girls that he was speaking too, also is natural but her hair looks [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]). i was more disgusted and taken aback by the girls who actually agreed! like um....how does someones hair texture make them more or less beautiful?! idk. self-loathing thoughts (especially something that hits so close to home for me) are just kinda frustrating to hear.
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Re: Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

Post by TXCHOCLTE on 18th February 2011, 8:41 pm

Miss Karyn...hold your head up hi & keep rockin' your beautiful curls...it sounds to me that these individuals were never taught to love themselves...God made us all different and we should love everything about ourselves as HE does...and remember "Ignorance IS Bliss!!!"
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Re: Do you think I'm being too sensitive?

Post by Nali1987 on 18th February 2011, 9:58 pm

"Miss Karyn...hold your head up hi & keep rockin' your beautiful curls...it sounds to me that these individuals were never taught to love themselves..."

Cosigns.
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