Afraid to BC, last time was mentally draining, HELP!

So, I am preparing for my second BC. I BC'ed November '09 and loved it, twas great, but I started to realize that I had shrinkage to the MAX, I mean my hair was literally down past my chin, but when curly, was maybe 1/3 of your pinky long. My stylist said she had never seen anything like it, I mean we would blow it out and it would last a day. So I let her texturize it, which was ok, got a little bit of stretch there, but still not what I was looking for. So finally, she told me that I would never get any hang time with such tightly coiled hair, so I let her relax it back in August '10. Now, my hair is back to falling out and shedding all over the place and looking a mess, bc chemicals + my hair = disaster. So I am now ready to BC all over again, and will this Friday, however, I want to avoid the pitfalls that made me relax previously. What oh what can I do to stretch out hair that is seriously shrunk? I mean as in although my hair is growing, looks borderline the same length for months and months? Please respond while I try to dig up photos!

Maybe you could try banding I read about it being a good way to stretch.....

I suffer from shrinkage too but it sounds like you have shrinkage to the max lol I find that doing twist outs are great for stretching the hair and dry twist outs I find work great as well.