Did He Just Say What I Think He Said!?!?!?

Former lurker stepping out...

I reconnected with a friend via FB, we had been friends before but he kind of dropped off the Facebook earth so yesterday, low and behold I had a friend request from him. So I couldn't sleep and we ended up talking over the phone since he was awake as well. We always tended to have deep, philosophical conversations and naturally our convo rolled into one. Ironically it was about the female perception and deep connection to hair.

"I mean weaves are okay, but must they be platinum blond and hang down your a$$? I prefer a natural look." I'm thinking he meant for the weave to look natural, which is understandable. He continued.

"You should be proud of your hair, females just need to stop relaxing, like, what's the point?"

"Really? Well there are plenty of naturals that feel the same way, and are in fact very proud of their hair."

We then proceed to talk about his gorgeous APL locs (he hadn't loc'd last time we spoke) and I expressed my desire for Sister/Micro locs in the future.

"Well you can't do that with that perm in your hair, maybe you should just stop, I'm sure your natural hair is beautiful."

All my FB pics are of my relaxed hair, he's only seen me with long relaxed hair, and thus far I haven't worn my natural hair out yet because I wanted to transition much longer than I actually did and I personally want more length.

"Well, I am natural, I cut off all my hair a few months ago."

...Silence....

I'm thinking oh my, here we go. He's about to go off like everyone else did about cutting my hair, mind you his hair is long and 2b/c-3a, so my "natural" and his "natural" may clearly be two different things, but I digress...

"I want a picture, I bet it looks great on you, I love the natural look." He asked if it was short now, which I answered honestly, and he didn't shun me or anything.

"You do understand my hair isn't like yours, right? I have a small fro." I explained.

"So what, all hair can be good if you take care of it, I just prefer natural, not a specific kind."

He then went on to say that whenever he had kids he wouldn't let his daughter get a relaxer because she was beautiful regardless, and other really sincere comments.

It was nice to have a positive perspective coming from a guy friend. Thus far, he is the only one with anything positive to say really, and I just wanted to share that positive experience with you ladies.

Ok I think I like your friend ... LOL but for real I really like where his mind is at. What a great conversation I'm so glad you shared it!

great guy! thanks for sharing!!!

Thank you Thank you THANK YOU for sharing !!

I came into this discussion expecting something negative, but what a great surprise! Girl you need to marry him...just joking [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] , but seriously, I like his way of thinking.

Thanks for sharing. It's encouraging to hear males like nice healthy hair and it doesn't always have to be relaxed and straight!

I think its great when a guy loves Natural hair

how awesome is that..i get so excited when i read stuff like this...it just warms my soul when a guy is into natural hair lol [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I was just as shocked guys, I was cheesing hard, like really? Could you please teach a seminar to other guys and teach thing your wisdom, lol.

@LaToya, um yea, I'm crushing kinda hard, lol.

Pft, my ex liked my natural hair, but he was a doofus lol. Hopefully I can find a guy like that! He sounds nice

@Muz, well its a start, I'm sure in time it will get better! I'm just hadn't heard anything positive from my guy friends, but now theres hope for the rest, lol.

JulezDeLaCurlz wrote:@LaToya, um yea, I'm crushing kinda hard, lol.

LOL don't blame you at all!

LaToya28 wrote:I came into this discussion expecting something negative, but what a great surprise! Girl you need to marry him...just joking [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] , but seriously, I like his way of thinking.

I'm not joking...marry him!

@Sisterboyd, I want him bad, lol, just today he was inquiring where his picture was, I was like, ummmm.....

"I'm not them, or like them (referring to my naysayers), you're beautiful inside and out, your hair will grow back, I'm expecting a picture within a few days..."

My jaw dropped. While everyone else is calling my BC mutilation, he calls it a blessing and a beautiful thing...

Wow! How inspring, I love hearing positive comments about natural hair... Thank you for sharing!!!

Despite loving our curly natural hair, I know us ladies do worry about the way guys perceive it...

I agree with the others - MARRY HIM! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

I concur.. you guys need to get together !!

Hopefully he has some friends who share the same intellect.. who happen to live in FL.. just kidding lol (maybe)

That's soooo beautiful! I'm glad that he likes you for you! And I'm hoping y'all can make a love connection!

JulezDeLaCurlz wrote:@Sisterboyd, I want him bad, lol, just today he was inquiring where his picture was, I was like, ummmm.....

"I'm not them, or like them (referring to my naysayers), you're beautiful inside and out, your hair will grow back, I'm expecting a picture within a few days..."

My jaw dropped. While everyone else is calling my BC mutilation, he calls it a blessing and a beautiful thing...

Please send him that picture

@Au Naturalle, yea, I'm so sick of explaining my decision to those who don't matter, it was nice to engage in positive intellectual conversation, instead of rude comments.

@mverde3, I know right, I keep telling him to hand out pamphlets to young brothers and educate, he thinks I'm playing.

@CocaColaCutie, we're just friends , for now. It was just a shock I think, I wanted to let you ladies hear a positive story...Cuz I'm cheezzziiinnnnggg!

@SisterBoyd, I'm working up to it... He just won't quit, so I guess I'll have to.

I love my fro, I can't wait til its huge! IDK about dating a guy with longer hair than me, lol.

Thanks ladies for the comments!

You know I've been playing with the idea of dating a guy with an afro or even locs. I'm the lover of a bald head, but I guess I might need to broaden my horizons too. ;0)