Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Syrah on 28th March 2010, 2:12 pm

I'm 29 (11 months from 30) and couldn't be more excited about turning 30. Right around 27/28 I spent a LOT of time doing the soul searching...and let me tell you, this evaluation HURT and it took FOREVER! Evaluating the people in my life and the role they play in my life (and the role I play in their's). I looked at my "career" and did an assessment of what I did and did not like about it - what I wanted to stay the same and what I wanted to change (besides the salary). Evaluated where I was physically (my body and healthy), emotionally, financially, spiritually and sexually.

And what I realized after a LOT of writing, crying and driving (that's where I do my best thinking) is that despite being far from perfect (perfection is overrated anyway), I'm pretty content with a lot of the decisions I've made throughout life. Sure I've made mistakes (big ones: hello, men!) but none irreparable.

My 20's were all about "exploration" - figuring out what I wanted out of life (who I wanted in my life, where I wanted to be, what I wanted to be doing and who I wanted to be doing it all with). I tried different careers, went back to school (twice - currently in school), dated and kissed some frogs and some princes that I simply wasn't ready for and am finally at a point where I think I've got most of the basics (BASICS I said) figured out.

At 29, I'm finally learning to be happy with ME - not what I'm wearing, driving, who I'm dating, where I'm working or what my business card says about me - but ME. My curly hair, my sometimes frustrating skin, that fold on my right hip that never seems to go away, my flat feet, skinny ankles and left boob that is starting to sit just a TAD bit lower than the right one. The fact that I can't shake my ass like the girls in the club who get all the attention, that I'd often prefer to be at home with a good book than at the bars, that sometimes I prefer Rachmaninov to Jay-Z and Soundgarden to Drake, that sometimes I'm over-analytical, other times too unstructured (yea, I can be flighty) and often hyper-sensitive despite the "yall can't phase me" attitude. That I will never be like my girl ________ who attracts the type of dudes I THOUGHT I wanted. I like me. And that feels good.

My 30's - I figure it's the perfect combination: I think I know what I want and will hopefully have the tools (and bag of tricks) to make it happen.

So yea, I'm ready for my 30's. I can't wait! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by LuvMeLuvMyFro on 5th April 2010, 9:14 am

cheers SCORE! I was looking the clapping hands but couldn't find them so I gave you the field goal instead. It seems like you have made peace with "YOU" and that is very inspiring.
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by kinksncurls on 7th April 2010, 1:41 am

I'm 24, will be 25 this September. I don't have any kids, but I got married really young. I got married at 19, my husband was 20 at the time. He was in the military and it was rough for the first year. My best friend of 10 years at the time, the person I thought would be my best friend for life, told me she didn't want to hang out because she didn't like my husband (whatever that means), and I went through a lot of issues with my family. Not because of my marriage, I was adopted and my adopted parents said some really hurtful things to me.

This year I truly figured out who I was. I realized that my family didn't define me, and that I didn't need anyone to validate who I was, the type of person I am, and who I should be with. It seriously took me 24 years to learn this lesson, but I'm grateful for every part of my journey. My natural hair has taught me patience and self love. I'm currently finishing up my master's degree (I should be done in may pending completion of my thesis). I had planned on going to a PhD, but didn't get in (with a 4.0 in my masters, three glowing letters of rec and 4 paper publications, because my GRE Scores were too low). I've gotten over it, and realized that God must have some alternate plan for me, so I'm going to go get a job, and succeed in the work place. I still have some ways to go in 20's but I'm confident that things will work themselves out for me, as they always have, and I'm finally happy with who I am, just the way I am.
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Heart2Worship on 8th April 2010, 11:22 am

@kinksncurls and Syrah--You ladies have some very inspirational stories! I agree with the both of you. Sometimes you have to take a time out and examine yourself. My motto is "I MUST HAVE PEACE!" There's nothing like it. I pray the both of you much success. And kinkncurls, it's great that you have it figured out now vs. being older and trying to pick up the pieces. I sure wish it didn't take me as long as it did.
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Nikcoils on 8th April 2010, 5:41 pm

I will be 32 at the end of this month. When I turned 30 I felt like i got my swag back, I lost 20 lbs of my baby weight and was back to the size I was when I got married. When I turned 30 everyone was saying how 50 was the new 30 and yada yada yada. When I turned 30 I said, "I am the new 30!" I wasn't trying to re-live any past era in my life. I went to college right after high school, did plenty of traveling, partying and dating. I've been married since I was 25 and had my daughter at 27. My twenties were all about learning about me, my husband and motherhood. Career wise I am where I need to be, where I can focus on my family and God. I am actually less stressed in my 30's then when I was in my 20's as I look back at where God has brought me from. I am finding out since rocking my natural tresses I get more compliments that I look like I am in my 20's or I still get carded. I think that has alot to do with me being happy with who I am and would not change any of my past experiences cause they make me who I am today faults and all. And that I am a Work in Progress. In the words of the Whispers "It all gets better with time".
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by jjleo on 14th April 2010, 8:56 am

Hi Everyone,
I am new to this board. I joined because I wanted to post to the Henna thread, but this topic interests me as well.
I have been in my 30s for 4 years and counting and its been not as bad as I thought it would be. I remember when I turned 30, I was already married and my daughter had just turned 2 weeks before that. It was a perfect time to settle down from my wild and reckless 20's. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]I would like to forget a lot of my 20s, I think I was always searching, searching and relentlessly insecure. Now that I am in my 30s, I can honestly say that my resounding theme is "I don't care what other people think." It feels so good to be mature and yet so completely comfortable in my own skin. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by BekkaPoo on 14th April 2010, 12:50 pm

JJleo, I can definitely relate to the 20s and wanting to forget them..lol I think life definitely has only gotten better as I got older, but I learned a lot of lessons the hard way in my 20s.

I'm a bit of a late bloomer in life.. had my first real bf when I was 19, didn't move out of my parents house for good til I was (don't laugh.. money was tight!) 29, and I recently turned 35 and became engaged to the love of my life. He's 29 btw... hehe. I don't have any children yet, and if they are meant to be a part of my life then it will happen. For now, I am "Auntie" Bekka to the children of my friends. That works for me..

I am looking forward to what the next few decades bring. I like exploring, travelling, creating, and experiencing as much of life as I can. As long as I'm physically able to I will keep seeking adventure to keep me busy..
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by jjleo on 14th April 2010, 1:28 pm

BekkaPoo wrote:JJleo, I can definitely relate to the 20s and wanting to forget them..lol I think life definitely has only gotten better as I got older, but I learned a lot of lessons the hard way in my 20s.

I'm a bit of a late bloomer in life.. had my first real bf when I was 19, didn't move out of my parents house for good til I was (don't laugh.. money was tight!) 29, and I recently turned 35 and became engaged to the love of my life. He's 29 btw... hehe. I don't have any children yet, and if they are meant to be a part of my life then it will happen. For now, I am "Auntie" Bekka to the children of my friends. That works for me..

I am looking forward to what the next few decades bring. I like exploring, travelling, creating, and experiencing as much of life as I can. As long as I'm physically able to I will keep seeking adventure to keep me busy..
Hi BekkaPoo,
If I had the choice to stay in my parent's house until 29, I would do it too. Though I didn't live with my parents until that age, I don't think I was really independent until I was around 24 or so or maybe even 29, because I always lived with someone. I have only lived alone going on 4 years now.
Funny thing I wanted to add is that my bf is 28. Same age difference. How do you find the relationship? I am struggling with the age difference. My ex is now 40 and I can relate to him better than the 28 year old. We had bonded over liking the same type of old school music, but I am finding it challenging. He doesn't seem to care and hates when I bring it up, but I say that I am from the x gen and he is y, so there is definitely a separation there. What do you think?
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by BekkaPoo on 14th April 2010, 1:52 pm

jjleo wrote:
BekkaPoo wrote:JJleo, I can definitely relate to the 20s and wanting to forget them..lol I think life definitely has only gotten better as I got older, but I learned a lot of lessons the hard way in my 20s.

I'm a bit of a late bloomer in life.. had my first real bf when I was 19, didn't move out of my parents house for good til I was (don't laugh.. money was tight!) 29, and I recently turned 35 and became engaged to the love of my life. He's 29 btw... hehe. I don't have any children yet, and if they are meant to be a part of my life then it will happen. For now, I am "Auntie" Bekka to the children of my friends. That works for me..

I am looking forward to what the next few decades bring. I like exploring, travelling, creating, and experiencing as much of life as I can. As long as I'm physically able to I will keep seeking adventure to keep me busy..
Hi BekkaPoo,
If I had the choice to stay in my parent's house until 29, I would do it too. Though I didn't live with my parents until that age, I don't think I was really independent until I was around 24 or so or maybe even 29, because I always lived with someone. I have only lived alone going on 4 years now.
Funny thing I wanted to add is that my bf is 28. Same age difference. How do you find the relationship? I am struggling with the age difference. My ex is now 40 and I can relate to him better than the 28 year old. We had bonded over liking the same type of old school music, but I am finding it challenging. He doesn't seem to care and hates when I bring it up, but I say that I am from the x gen and he is y, so there is definitely a separation there. What do you think?

Hrm, well my opinion is that age is just a number, and that what really matters is how well do your personalities mesh.

Me and my sweetie have a good personality match so I hardly ever notice our age difference really. I do at times, but it's not so much that it is a problem. Anyways, I get carded more than he does! lol In my relationship we're both working class folks with creative streaks (I paint/crochet, he plays bass), so I guess that's why things work for us. I hope that your sweetie can do some catching up to your level..

Btw, have you ever seen the movie "Harold and Maude"? Talk about an age difference.. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Curly_Aquarius on 16th April 2010, 12:22 pm

BlondeByDesire wrote:Well I'll be 41 this year ... time sure does fly ... these years are just rolling on by. I will have been married for 21 years come this September.

I too was a young Mom -- my oldest will be 23 ... and my youngest will be 16 this year.

I feel really good for my age and I always get carded. Most of the time when I'm out people think my kids and I are siblings.

@Chrs - wow I wish you much luck and success in TTC this year or when ever you are ready. I'm sure you will have a happy healthy spoiled Baby.

I got a tubuligation after the my third kid - at the time it was the right choice for me. Sometimes now, I regret it and then not. But I also think I only have 2 more years before my youngest is off to college and it will be just me and my Hubby ... that's a great feeling too. Looking forward to one day having grand-kids and spoiling them and then sending them home.

I've learned a lot during my 40 years thus far. I'm enjoying life and greatful each and every morning I wake up and see another day.
I'm in the same boat about the TL situation, My youngest a boy is 7, 8 in August and I kinda wish for more children sometimes. My other two are 14 a girl and 9, 10 in June a boy. I kinda wish i was done with school already, but it took me years to find out what I truly wanted to do career wise. I married at 19 so it was very little we could do by our self but depend on each other. I love being my age 32. Although my sisters say I am older acting then I look, I still get some people that swear that I am in my 20's it makes me feel good, My 20's I was raising children, figuring out marriage and going to school. So my age rocks for now
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Syrah on 17th April 2010, 9:30 pm

jjleo wrote:Hi Everyone,
It was a perfect time to settle down from my wild and reckless 20's. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]I would like to forget a lot of my 20s, I think I was always searching, searching and relentlessly insecure.

I think there's something to be said for the "wild and reckless 20's"...not necessarily getting buckwild, but actually living your twenties as a twenty year-old should.

Nothing worse than seeing 30 somethings trying to recreate their 20s, or even worse, 40 somethings trying to recreate their 20s.

Live in the moment but prepare for the future....
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by tashafawn24 on 23rd April 2010, 9:46 pm

Hello everyone, I can definitely relate to a lot of these posts on here. I think jjleo said it best about wanting to forget my 20's. I had a lot of ups but plenty of downs. I look at my 20's as being a learning experience. I joined the Army right after high school, went to Iraq, got out and went to school, got married at 22 and had my first daughter at 26 and had my youngest daughter at 27 (I was 2 weeks shy of turning 28)! I'm 29 now and what a ride that was! I never partied at clubs, never experimented with drugs, I was pretty much a goody girl to a certain degree.

I think I spent more time in my 20's searching for someone to love me because I didn't love myself (Looooong story). But yeah, the 20's are far behind me and now I am ready to embrace my 30's like a soldier! Besides, I think as long as you take care of yourself then you can wear your 30's and not have your 30's wear you. I've seen some ladies (not on here [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] ) who are in their 30's look like they've had it really rough and you can tell it in their faces.
Don't be sad about turning 30 because I think I look way hotter now than I did in my 20's (I guess I am the fine wine type; it gets better with age) [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
I am going to be a hottie until gravity fails me!
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by luvinlife225 on 26th April 2010, 12:49 pm

Hey Ladies!

Wow, I've truly enjoyed reading this.. The last couple of years I've been dreading the end of my 20's, knowing the big 3 0 was lurking so when I turned 29 in Feb I was totally surprised that I was disappointed I wasn't turning 30! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] I feel almost about turning 30 the way I felt when I was anticipating my BC... A little apprehensive because I didn't know what changes it would bring, but READY because I was tired of transitioning.. Right now I feel my life is in transition, and it's awesome! I have goals I'd like to reach and I'm excited to see where I'll be in relation to those goals at 30. So I can't wait!! My 20's have been a wonderful jouney filled with twists, turns, ups and downs with some self discovery (like most here) and I can't wait to see what awaits in my 3rd decade. [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
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30 is not half bad

Post by bcflorida_queen on 8th June 2010, 9:41 pm

I turned 30 last November (will be 31 in another 5 months). Turning 30 was a non-event. Nothing changed for me. I feel the same and there were no physical changes. I'm still on the same mission that I was on in my last years of my 20s: (1) improve my health and fitness, (2) successful career, (3) find someone who loves me for "me". I am single w/no children so I hope that my 30s will bring relationship success and possibly children. So, in that sense my 30s should be exciting.

To ring in the big 30 I took a Mediterranean cruise with several of my college friends who were also celebrating their big birthday. It was a fun way to bring in a new decade. I started the 30s off right so I expect that this next decade will be fulfilling.

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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Napp_Napp_Cat on 11th June 2010, 12:36 pm

Wow you ladies are sooooo great! I love it! I'm actually only 21 years old but I can honestly say that I feel as each year goes by I gain more maturity and grow a bit wiser and stronger as well.

Some of my friends who are in their 20's as well are always worried about finding a boyfriend or getting married and ready for the "married & family" life without really enjoying their own life. I think I'm one of the few people that I know that loves my 20's, and I enjoy every moment of it. When I make mistakes, I look back and learn from them. I try not to dwell on negativity and try and realize that everything happens for a reason.

I feel like being 21 is fun and I'm happy to say that I'm ready to grow older...well sometimes lol! But I'm not afraid to grow a day older. If my boobs start to sag as time goes...so what!..if I can no longer drop it in the clubs..that's cool to lol! I'm not afraid anymore and I'm enjoying every day of my life that God gives me.

When that time comes for me to get married, start my career, have children, etc I will be happy with it. When can never predict the future but we can only be happy with it.

Best Wishes to everyone and also I have been reading everyone's replies and I have noticed that a lot of you don't really look your age. You all really do look a lot younger..I guess it's true when they say "black don't crack" hehehe! Stay beautiful everyone and enjoy life to the fullest!
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by suqiit on 15th June 2010, 3:38 am

bump?

Love this thread btw!

So I turned the big 3-0 last year and I'm not loving the way 31 sounds. But I spent the majority of my 20's living the way society told me I should and was always rebellious. Things just didn't settle well in my soul. I married at 18, had my son at 21 and my daughter at 24. By 27 I could not continue on anymore. My gypsy soul gave me a reality check! Happy? NO! Hippie? YES! Bohemian? YES! Gay? YES!

During my 20s I felt compelled to comply to societies standards even though my soul cried in my chest in resistance for years. I could not fight my heart anymore. I started my gypsy/bohemian life over with kiddies in tow. My life in my late 20s/early 30s resembles little of my early 20s. In my early 20s I still had my hippie background (RAISE IN CALI!) but I was somewhat conservative (hated it). I stayed home with my children, worked from home as a real estate agent, but did a lot of volunteer work. I even worked as a breastfeeding counselor for sometime.

Now that I am FREEEEEEEEEEEEE, lol.... I am a full time mommy, full time college student, full time hippie, full time bohemian, full time activist and part time artist. 30 was a much smoother transition for me, because I no longer denied who I was to anyone. My home is full of love, art, books and incense. There is something about, no matter the age, claiming who you truly are and embracing it to the fullest. So ladies, who cares how old you are! Just STAY TRUE TO YOURSELF. And always remember.....

*art washes away from the soul, the dust of everyday life* ~Pablo Picasso
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by CrissyQ on 15th June 2010, 3:16 pm

34 soon to be 35 and lovin it. I liked my 20's but i can say i love my 30's.
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Neems on 16th July 2010, 5:05 pm

I'm only 22 and so far things are going well. Definitely learning a lot about myself. It's surpringly how much one grows in the face of adversity.
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by TheRYL1 on 16th July 2010, 6:44 pm

I'm just seeing this thread!

Well...I am 40 and a half! LOL And I must say...I'm thankful to have made it this far! From ages 16-19 I lost so many good friends (this was during the Crack 80s...when many of y'all was babies or not even born yet...LOL) to drive-bys and other nonsense. That's not even counting those locked away FOREVER! So to be my age, from around my way, is truly a blessing!

My life, my life, my life! I've taken care of myself and everyone else since I was 14 years old...then I had my own child at 21...so right now at 40, I'm 20 again! :-)

Like many of you young women here, I didn't have the opportunity to learn what I liked and/or wanted to be at a young age...I had survival to deal with. So, currently, I'm working on obtaining my B.A. in Psychology/Polical Science (not sure which route to go...possibly both?). I'm also working to make sure my 18-year old daughter can make it through college as smoothly as possible, but I know she'll be ok because she has me to help her get over, around, and/or through any barrier...something I never had.

So...whatever age you're about to be...enjoy and be thankful! No fear...just prepare to be better!

Right now, I have a new love and it's very satisfying, might I add! It's come at the right time...I'm free to enjoy us and whatever we want to do. Life is good right now. I'm pleased! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]

And for the record, I can still get out on the dance floor and teach you how to Dougie, teach, teach you how to Dougie! [You must be registered and logged in to see this image.] Ask The Man...he gets hot cuz the brothaz be on me! LOL
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by LuvMeLuvMyFro on 23rd September 2010, 4:41 pm

The Thirties: not quite old, not quite young
http://thebig30sblog.blogspot.com/
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Kez on 28th October 2010, 10:31 am

hey everyone, just came across this thread and LOVE it! Mostly cos this has been on my mind lately, my age and on the first page I see a few ladies saying about being 27/28 nearing 30 - thats me!
Im 27, i will be 28 3rd March, which to me is nearing my 30's - which is cool. i dont mind that! What i do mind, is the speed at which it is approaching, life sure does fly, clique i know, but it does!
My childhood was my favourite as myself, Mum and my sister Vic lived with my Nan and Pamp, and what an amazing time did we have, i hated it whn we left (mum met who would become my stepdad of 15-16yrs and have my baby sister Paige -now almost 19yrs old), but i always missed Nan and Pamps, though remained ever so close. Teens, nothing unusual, pretty good, enjoyed school etc.
My twenties, this has shaped me soooo much! Its been some of the best and worst times of my life, I met and married my now husband Ant when i was 24 (and a half), bought my first house (well, mortgage obviously!), have had a great social life too, some lovely holidays, done pretty good work wise and salary wise, which leads to some crap (to follow in a sec!), and I have been making and selking bags this last 16mths or so adn almost at 200sales - so im setting up a business now all good and proper - with hopes to do this full time!
However, the salary front, I earn a good, well pretty decent salary, which gives me freedom to save for holidays, have a pretty nice car, afford my bills and mtg each mth, same as the husband, however, i dont enjoy it, and im bored, so im kinda trapped, i equally like the money, equal to disliking it and being bored, dilema, i rack my brains always, if i leave i'll be happy in job but less so financially and socially as cant do the things we love to do, holiday, meals, trips, shopping etc, so arghhhh - still figuring it out.
I lost my beloved Nan mentioned above who is one of if not the greatest love of my entire life, my heart aches for her desperately every single day, it makes me sick how much i miss her that sadly i switch off a little from thinking too much about her for which i have guilt, but i know she'd understand - i just thought she'd live forever in some silly naive way (i obviously knew she wouldnt but you might get what i mean!?), shes been gone 2 and a half yrs almost. However, i have Pamp (Granddad still) he was 93 2 days ago, wooooooooo, he too is another great love and inspiration.
Also, I have had a hard tme concieveing, have discovered Endometriosis, lost twins after 2 and half yrs of trying and having lots of fertility treatment, miscarried first baby and 2nd was ectopic, but alive and well at the time, i was about to rupture and could have died so had to have emergency surgery and lost my right tube, making trying even harder, i cant concieve naturally now. I also had 2 prior operations laparoscopies on my uterus and 2 surgeries on my tummy again for Skin cancer removal, Melanoma, i was really unlucky to have it they said - no Shit! (All clear now), I fractured my coccyx and have re-fractured and irritaed it 2 more times, all this in 3yrs - so my twnties have been a bloody hard lesson in life, sadly mostly bad, but whats good about it is that im a one strong woman, throw as much sh8t at me as you want, and i'll keep going, even through all the tears and weakness i feel at times, you cant keep me down . . so for that, im grateful, im also grateful for my husband, we have been tested in ways i wouldnt wish on anyone and we've been so strained we have 'alsmost' questioned if we can handle anymore - but the point being almost questioned, we never gave up - we are soulmates and we will get through anything, he is my heart!
However, im human and have a heart and feelings, and hope i get a better time of it soon to just 'be' and not figure things out or be forced to.
So, I have actually answered a lot, my 20's are making sense right in front my eyes as i type, they are for learning, experiencing the good and the bad, though more bad I feel, good WILL follow im sure! It has to....''every cloud...'' so they say. So from my 20's, i hope to be a strong, experieced woman, sure of myself ad my abilities. I will hopefully have a successful business up and runing - then my passion can over ride the financial worries/fears i mentioned, as long as i can bring in whats needed - the rest can follow, i hope to be a mother, the only good to come out of trying so hard is knowing if this baby comes, my goodness will it be loved and i know i will have the patience to be the best mother i can possibly be, the best thing i feel you can give a child is your time and I will give it.
Now, the less serious things, now im nearing 30's, i find im dressing a little more demure, im kinda a rock chic i guess at heart, but im enjoying blouses and tailored looks more again, but then, that'll change again in no time, but i do think, oooh im 30 in a couple of years, should i tone it down haha, 30's nothing, i think be dignified, but ya know what, if im looking good, i'm gonna keep having fun with my fashion!
Well, that was some unexpected therapy lol! Sorry to rant!
take care and i think lets all embrace the chapters or even the decades we are in, cos we wont be getting them back thats for sure! xxxxx
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by KinkyNappyHappy on 30th October 2010, 1:55 pm

Another great thread...and I'm going to give my take on this because I can. Next year I will be 50 years old. When I think about it...it seems so unreal. I mean...I don't feel 50, but I sure don't feel 20 anymore!!! LOL

When I was in my 20's I had a ball. My mom was strict when I was coming up, so all I wanted to do was party. I could have been married to my sole mate at that time, but he didn't want me to go out. So he married someone else. That hurt, but I didn't have time to dwell on that...I was trying to get my party on.

Ladies...when you have daughters don't keep them stuck to you and in the house, TALK to them and tell them about men, sex and relationships. You will create a bond that will never be broken.

Well at the end of my 20's I decided okay it was time to get married, so I did to the wrong man!!! So I spent my 30's getting a divorce and growing up for real. Single parenting will open you eyes to a whole new world. By the end of my 30's I realized that turning 40 meant that I had lived over half of my life expectancy and that for me was the turning point of my live!! I made decision that were best for me!! I mean at this point in my life I decided that I was going to be happy no matter what!!

So as I look at turning 50 in about 7 months...I feel the best is yet to come. I feel liberated, NOT old...I don't know how 50 is suppose to feel, but I'm so ready to do ME!! I put my life on hold to raise my sons alone, and now I'm ready to travel, go shopping and not make the boys/young men section my first stop when shopping. I think the first thing I'm going to do is buy something I really want, and not worry about whether it's on sale!! (I'll do this one time, then I'll get back to sales, sales, and more sales!!!)

You are living and learning so much about life, relationships and just surviving during your 20's, 30's, and even your 40's....but when you turn 50 man it is a feeling I can't explain. I'm looking forward to things like retiring in 9 years!! cheers I don't have to stay on a job if I don't want to past 58, and I hope my sons are doing well and I don't have a desire for grandkids. (not for another 10 years..LOL) I know I'm being selfish, but I need a minute to just do ME!!!

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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by sweetdrk1 on 6th November 2010, 11:03 am

tiashaunteƩ wrote:
HAMPTONSFNST wrote: There's this old Jewish proverb that helped me realize that I'm where I should be. "Man makes plans and God laughs." Our Creator already knows how things are going to turn out. We just have to use our mistakes to teach us what not to do.

I like that!

What Tia said!

I am 44 and I love me more now then when I was in my 20's and 30's! There something about 40 to me that sort of weeded out the nonsense. I am in full fledge doing me mode! In the other decades I was seeking acceptance and now? Uhm you are on your own! Lol! I will say this, it phase has a lesson, enjoy it!
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Sebastain13 on 6th November 2010, 5:33 pm

Im n my 40's and I feel that this is the best time of my life I learned to accep some things that I cannot change and move forward with my life
I have 2 adult children 21 & 23 and I had them young it was difficult but Im glad that had them when I did
I feel that Im smarter & wiser I dont do as much as I did in my 20s & 30s but I can hang when I want to but my life has changed so much & I am so grateful for the things that I have learned to make my life better
I wish that I had the same forsight n my 20s with raising my children bcause I wanted to be a better mother
The only thing I dont like is that I have NEVER been married & I get very lonely at hme alone but I jus pray and sometimes it goes away and sometimes it doesnt but I seem to manage
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

Post by Allwoman on 5th December 2010, 1:57 pm

Love this topic, it shows that life can be good at any age, as long as we ourselves are in control of it.

I will be 45 in 2 weeks!!!!!
I'm like, what, when, how????? What a Face

Getting older is alright in my book. So far it's just getting better, even though I had the time of my life in my 20's, Even though i was raising small children and married to Mr. Wrong in my 30's I still had a blast!

I even started over when I had my last child at 39 and married Mr. Somewhat Right, I divorced again this year and life is sooo good.

The past few years have been filled with trials and tribulations but a lot of good has come from it.
I transitioned from relaxed hair and from flat shoes, embraced my curls and my height.
I finally had a breast reduction, I figured I was worth it so I depleted my rainyday account.
I've been unemployed for a year and rethinking this whole work/employment thing.
If nobody wants me maybe I should create my own, let's see what my brain can come up with.

I am going to have a grand birthday with myself and be happy that even though I'm turning 45, I don't look a minute over 38!!!! Razz
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Re: Life: 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s, & beyond

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